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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28323957">365 Hours with Rufus Shinra</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/koulakoukoula/pseuds/koulakoukoula'>koulakoukoula</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Sandy's Canon World of FFVII [3]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Compilation of Final Fantasy VII</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Break Up, Dom/sub, Enemies to Lovers, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Light BDSM, Past Rape/Non-con, Porn, Porn With Plot, Rufus Shinra a softie???, Smut, main character dies twice lol, tried to keep rufus on character you're welcome</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-12-25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-26</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 17:20:51</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>79,346</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28323957</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/koulakoukoula/pseuds/koulakoukoula</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Hannah, the older sister of Reno, is a successful CEO of an Electric Power Company that -instead of Mako- uses coal as an energy source, only to have Shinra getting in her way and crushing the company that she has tried so hard to establish. Rufus comes to her rescue although he is no <em> knight in shining armour </em>. He asks for something in return, and she has no choice but to give it.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Elena/Tseng (Compilation of FFVII), Reno (Compilation of FFVII)/Original Female Character(s), Rufus Shinra/Original Female Character(s)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Sandy's Canon World of FFVII [3]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/2027087</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>18</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Hello, would you, kindly fuck off?</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>So, you can see the title is a reference to that cringy-all-smut movie <strong> 365 Days </strong> though I changed it to <strong> 365 <del> Days </del> Hours </strong> which are almost 15 days, and it is the duration of the contract that the OC signs with Rufus Shinra. </p><p>The events in this fic happen almost simultaneously as the events of <strong> Blood and Sympathy </strong>.</p><p>Enjoy!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><strong>HE HATED</strong> to be there. <em>God, </em>he hated it more than he remembered himself hating anything else. There was the sound of glasses landing on tables and counters, accompanied by the loud chattering of people, talking, and drinking, and having a laugh. The sound of champagne bottles, popping open, and being served to the guests of the <em>Shinra Family </em>that had gathered in the Presidential Residence at the very centre of Midgar. There were women in <em>fancy, </em>colourful dresses and expensive jewellery around their necks, their wrists, their ears. Even the President’s son was there even though he <em>loathed </em>to be.</p><p><em>Thirty years</em>. There had <em>already </em>been <em>thirty whole years </em>since the construction of Midgar. Thirty years of <em>sucking </em>the lifeblood of their very Planet. Rufus couldn’t complain. He’d never complain when it came to <em>money</em>, but, perhaps, that too was one of the many things that he <em>despised </em>about his <em>dear father. Greed. </em>He wanted to leave. He had far more important things to attend to than his father’s <em>insignificant</em> balls and <em>nugatory </em>guests. He couldn’t care less for the anniversary of a <em>cursed </em>company, that was killing the Planet and that everybody was applauding for.</p><p>But, instead, he just sipped on his <em>ridiculously expensive </em>champagne and stared down at his <em>dear father </em>while he talked, and joked, and entertained their <em>repulsive </em>guests. All of Shinra’s executives were <em>old, just like his father. </em>Uncle Palmer would never miss the chance of indulging himself with the <em>free </em>goods of their buffet. Reeve, and Heidegger, and Scarlett were too scattered around the ground floor talking to people. The jazz band played the jazzy blues and he tried to keep most of his attention on the music. It was certainly more important than that <em>chatter </em>that came from all these people.</p><p>Rufus stared down at the numerous people from the second floor. There were buffets, and waiters and waitresses on the second floor too, but the guests were lesser than the ones downstairs. He’d be escaping their eyes <em>for now. </em>Tseng was standing no further away. His hands trapped behind his back, assigned his protection, whilst Reno, Rude and Elena were scattered around the house, on guard duty. Rufus’s fingers tapped, and tapped, <em>and tapped </em>on the wooden banister of the upper floor. <em>God, </em>he <em>hated </em>being there.</p><p>But then something caught his attention and he couldn’t help but raise an eyebrow and stop the incessant tapping of his fingers on the wooden banister. She was dressed in red. A dark crimson. Everybody’s attention fell on her the moment she entered and he wouldn’t be surprised. Most of her back was exposed, not to mention that large V that let out half her cleavage, and that large slit on her dress that exposed more and more of her thigh while she walked.</p><p>“Oh shit,” Reno’s voice came from behind, as the young Turk hurried over the edge of the upper floor’s balcony. His eyes widened in alarm, pinning on the attractive woman. His fingers dug into wooden banister as he cringed and gritted his teeth in embarrassment.</p><p>“I see she caught your attention,” Rufus raised an eyebrow, and Reno tensed up immediately as he turned to his boss and cleared his throat.</p><p>“N- No, sir! She’s uh…” he rubbed his nape nervously, “…she’s my sister,” Reno choked out as his hand reached for his napkin, pulling it with his fingers and unbuttoning another button of his shirt. <em>Suddenly the temperature seemed to have increased dramatically</em>. Nervous he was <em>indeed. </em>“Uh… s-sir-?”</p><p>“Permission to go downstairs, granted,” Rufus pointed his chin at the young Turk before he nodded.</p><p>“T- Thank you, sir!” Reno hurriedly ran downstairs, regretting immediately telling her to come to this ball in the first place.</p><p>The bartender looked cute as he shook the metropolitan that she had just ordered. She rested her chin on top of her palm as she settled on a bench on the bar. She let the split of her dress fall wide open exposing her entire left leg, but she didn’t give a <em>fuck </em>if people stared at her. And when she heard her name coming from a familiar voice behind her, she rolled her eyes. She didn’t even have to turn at the man.</p><p>“What are you doing here?!” Reno <em>whisper-shouted. </em>He seemed <em>panicked</em>. She was <em>amused. </em></p><p>“What do you mean what I’m doing here? <em>You</em> asked me to come, <em>traitor</em>,” She said.</p><p>He groaned irritatingly as he pointed a finger at her. “Stop with that!” He scolded. There was indeed a reason why she always called him that. But <em>right now, </em>there were more urgent matters at hand. “I did ask you, but not <em>dressed like this!”</em></p><p>His hand reached for her dress, pulling it up and closing that schism, shielding her thigh with the red silky fabric. He nervously looked around only to see some <em>guests, discreetly, staring at them and murmuring at each other. </em></p><p>She sipped on her cocktail “Shut up, <em>traitor</em>. You don’t get to tell me what to wear,”     </p><p>Reno pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration “Look, sis, I know you’re mad-”</p><p>“Mad? No, that doesn’t even explain <em>half</em> of <em>what</em> I feel today,” She laughed.</p><p>“So, this is your sister, Reno,” The Vice President’s voice came from behind and Reno tensed up immediately.</p><p>“Uhhh… y-yes, sir,”</p><p>“Would you mind introducing us?” Rufus raised an eyebrow and Reno sighed in defeat.</p><p>“Mr. Vice President this is Hannah Sinclair. Hannah this is Rufus Shinra,” Reno introduced them briefly as he let out a loud sigh and Hannah offered her hand.</p><p>Icy blue eyes found hers as he caught her hand and pressed a soft kiss on the back of her knuckles. “Charmed to meet you, Mr. Vice President,” She gave him a wide smile. “Would you mind telling your <em>papa </em>to fuck off?”</p><p>Reno choked on his saliva and started coughing till his eyes felt watery and he was sure his face was the same colour as his hair -if not darker. He pinched his sister’s exposed shoulder and he shot her a glare.</p><p>“What the fuck-”</p><p>“Reno,” Rufus cut him. “Permission to go back upstairs, granted,”</p><p>Reno glared at his sister before he walked away just like he was asked to do. Rufus ordered a martini before he turned his attention back to Ms. Sinclair as she sipped on her own drink.</p><p>“Do you know what you celebrate today, Mr. Vice President?” She rested her chin on her hand, while pressing her elbow on the counter. He knew the answer, but something told him it wasn’t quite what she had in mind. “You celebrate your company, crushing mine,” She laughed. It was <em>funny</em> to think of <em>how </em>the <em>great</em> <em>Shinra Corporation</em> had achieved that.</p><p>He raised an eyebrow, whilst the tip of his lips quirked up slightly in amusement. “How so?”</p><p>“Oh, I’m sure you know Mr. Vice President, that Excel Corp uses coal as an energy source, and there’s no other place identical to the abundance of coal than the mines of Corel,” She smiled bitterly as she chugged down another glass of her drink, “I was supposed to be closing a deal today. Five <em>billion</em> tons of coal to be excavated and sold for <em>nothing</em>. And you know what your <em>dear father </em>did?” she leaned close. “He <em>bought </em>Corel,”</p><p>She threw her head back and laughed. She laughed wholeheartedly, but <em>-oh- </em>her company was <em>doomed. </em>The company, whose entirety she had built on her own from ground up, was going to be bankrupted by <em>next week. </em>Or at least, she’d be <em>lucky </em>if it even lasted <em>a week. </em></p><p>Rufus hummed amusingly. His lips curled into an ironic smile, “Dear father is quite the businessman,” <em>oh, how much he doubted that. </em></p><p>“Your father is quite the <em>asshole</em>,”</p><p>He laughed. He’d never say that he didn’t agree. He hated that man with all his might. But even <em>now, </em>he couldn’t deny that he <em>didn’t </em>grow an ounce respect for her. Reno, <em>sure</em>, had done a pretty good job at keeping everything about his sister a surreptitious secret. He hadn’t said anything. He hadn’t told him that his very sister was the CEO of the most competent Electric Power Company in Midgar. Yet again, it made sense that he’d keep it a secret. He was working for Shinra while his own sister was basically <em>rivalling </em>Shinra.</p><p>But there wasn’t much of a competition. The other Electric Power Companies just used inefficient sources of energy, and after lots of convincing, they gave up and agreed to merge with Shinra. The Excel Corporation used <em>coal. </em>Also an inefficient source of energy, but environmentally friendly, and that was <em>exactly </em>where they had based their <em>advertisement </em>on.</p><p>“I understand that you established this company of yours from the ground up. It must hold some sentimental value to you,”</p><p>She chuckled. “C’mon, Mr. Vice President, you’re the offspring of the most tremendous son of a bitch to have stepped on Gaia. I’m pretty sure you know that when it comes to business, there’s certainly no room for <em>sentimental values</em>,”</p><p>“That may be true, but you do want to save your company, don’t you?” He said and she fell silent for a short moment. Her fingers traced around the cold glass of her drink. Probably the third that she <em>now </em>had. “What if I helped you?”</p><p>She looked at him with an arched eyebrow and an incredulous look. “Aren’t you supposed to be on house arrest?”</p><p>“I used to be, until <em>dear father </em>asked me to come to this <em>time-wasting </em>event,”</p><p>She chuckled, but still took a moment to think. She knew that he had yet to tell her the end of the deal. “And what if I let you help me? What do you want in return?”</p><p>His eyes found hers. His hand reached for her thigh, pushing that piece of fabric back off, and revealing her thigh beneath. “I’m sure you’re smart enough to guess,” Her head rolled back and she laughed. She laughed until her eyes watered. It was <em>funny. Oh Gaia, </em>it was <em>hilarious! </em>Her hand reached for her stomach, clutching on the dress as she tried her best to ease the laughter.</p><p>“What do you think I am? I studied Endocrinology, not Literature,”</p><p>“Which means?”</p><p>“Which means, I’m not a dumb bitch who would spread her legs for you without you having to ask,” She tried her best to stop laughing and she was very aware of his smirk turning into a frown of annoyance. And -<em>oh Holy</em>- that only made things more <em>hilarious</em>. “Unlike anyone else in your life, I don’t work for you,”</p><p>“You might have to if you lost your company…” He threatened and her laugh disappeared. “…now, now… you wouldn’t want that to happen, would you?”</p><p>She let out a bitter chuckle. As much as she hated to admit, Rufus Shinra, and his <em>repulsive </em>father, and that <em>cursed </em>company of theirs had all the leverage, whilst her company would be bankrupt by next week, <em>luckily</em>. She couldn’t hope to wait for her employees to find new resources of coal <em>by next week. </em></p><p>She frowned. <em>Well, shit. </em>It’s not like it was going to be the <em>first time </em>she <em>spread her legs </em>for the sake of her company. “And how does this deal start, Mr. Vice President?”</p><p>His tongue flashed across his lips as he leaned closer and whispered “By you, taking off your knickers, and handing them to me,”</p><p>Her eyes widened in alarm. “Now?”</p><p>“Right here, right now,”</p><p>There was something so <em>commanding </em>about the way he said that. She didn’t know if she should slap him and call him something <em>very unpleasant </em>or do as he asked and see where it <em>goes. Damn him. </em>He was the son of her <em>sworn </em>enemy. Of the man who had nearly killed her brother and her <em>dumb brother </em>was still working for him. Alas, she knew Reno <em>loved </em>both his job and his boss. <em>His true </em>boss. The man standing in front of her with those icy blue eyes that shook her to the core the more he stared at her.</p><p><em>For now, </em>she had to bite back her <em>values </em>because -<em>let’s be honest</em>- <em>there are no values in business</em>. How long was <em>papa Shinra </em>going to last on his throne? Rufus was next, and everybody knew that, and he was the only one who seemed -at least, a little bit more- sane.</p><p>Hannah bit her tongue as her hands crept beneath her dress -as discreetly as possible. She wasn’t sure if people were staring and mumbling and gossiping. The <em>Vice President </em>sure didn’t seem to <em>give a fuck </em>about it either. She gathered the black, thin fabric of her panties in a ball in her fist and she handed it to him. He took it from her hand and she chuckled. <em>All men are the -fucking- same. </em>She finished her drink and got up to leave, but his hand grasped her forearm tightly, stopping her. His lips found her ear. His breath brushed warm against her earlobe.</p><p>“Tomorrow at 8, your brother will bring you to my place, to retrieve these,” He brought them up, with his index and middle finger buried beneath the black fabric. <em>Oh no. </em>She was blushing and she had to hide it somehow. She laughed. Cocky laughing always worked. <em>Right? </em>She turned at the Vice President and only then did she realise how significantly taller he was than her even sitting on the bench. A smile flashed across her lips as she lifted her hand and patted his cheek.</p><p>“I can drive my own fucking car,”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. would you, kindly, leave me the fuck alone?</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><strong>THE HEADQUARTERS</strong> were a mess and it made sense that they would be. There were people working maniacally, searching for the uncharted territories of all the continents of Gaia’s. There <em>had </em>to be coal <em>somewhere </em>else <em>except Corel</em>. She couldn’t believe that <em>this was the end of her company. </em>She had struggled so much trying to get there. She had entire villages that relied on her electric energy. The 12% of Midgar’s accommodations too relied on her sources which -<em>mind you</em>- was <em>a lot </em>in a City governed by Shinra, comprised of thousands of people that worked for it.</p><p>Hannah looked at the people. <em>Her employees</em>. She would have to fire thousands of them and eventually -most possibly- sell her apartment and her car to gather enough money to start over. <em>Perfect. </em>All because of that <em>cursed </em>company and that <em>asshole </em>that governed it. <em>Oh- </em>what wouldn’t she give for the chance to <em>strangle that man with her own hands. </em></p><p>She checked the time on the watch that she had tied around her wrist and she frowned. It was <strong>7:30PM</strong> and some of her employees were clocking out for the night. But she knew that the <em>boss can never really leave until</em> -at least- <em>midnight</em>. Until -at least- <em>some </em>solution was found.</p><p>And so, she stayed in her office. Her room, the only one that still had light in it. The monitor’s light reflected on her glasses as she scrolled and searched, <em>and searched. </em>She was unintentionally biting her thumb. Her eyes stung with exhaustion but she couldn’t go to sleep just yet. She really couldn’t.</p><p>And then she heard footsteps and a knock on her door. She was sure that everybody was gone and the security on her building’s gates wouldn’t let someone in unless that someone was <em>trustworthy. </em></p><p>The man entered her office anyway, and she rolled her eyes. “Did you come to check on your older sis, <em>traitor?” </em></p><p>Reno groaned and pinched the bridge of his nose in clear frustration. “Get your ass up, I got the chopper on the helipad. We need to get to Junon on time,” he checked on his watch and frowned.</p><p>“Junon? Right now?” For once, she took her attention off her computer’s screen and raised an eyebrow. When she checked the time, the realisation hit her. “Ohh! I got a <em>fucking </em>session with your boss!” </p><p>He hated how <em>normal </em>she made it sound. “Can you please use some other word? Like… a date? Or a… business meeting?” Reno hopelessly suggested.</p><p>“Yeah…” She took off her glasses and set off to turn off her computer, “…a business meeting where we’re going to <em>fuck</em>,”</p><p>He sucked a deep breath trying to calm down his nerves. “For fuck’s sakes, Hanney, I don’t like it any more than you do,”</p><p>She got up and walked around her desk to reach him. “Do I get the chance to change and freshen up my makeup or-”</p><p>“There’s everything you need on the chopper. Let’s go,” Reno grabbed her hand and started dragging her with him towards the elevator of her building. Hannah indifferently followed her little brother, yawning in the way to the elevator. <em>Dammit, </em>she was tired. She’d fall asleep during <em>sex</em>. She laughed.  </p><p>The two siblings waited in the elevator as it took them upwards. Reno crossed his hands against his bare chest and tapped his foot on the floor. She hung her bag by her shoulder and she looked at her brother with an arched eyebrow.</p><p>“Don’t tell me he’s even given you a dress,”</p><p>The answer took a minute to come and Reno pursed his lips and tried to look anywhere but her. He gave in eventually, sighing and loosening the tightness around his shoulders.</p><p>“<em>Yes</em>,” it came out silent. Almost a whisper, hoping that she wouldn’t have heard him, but she did and she laughed. She laughed until she had to press a hand on her brother’s shoulder to keep herself standing and she was pretty sure Reno was shooting her a glare. “It’s not funny, Hannah,” He growled.</p><p>“What do you mean it’s not funny? It’s hilarious!” Her hand reached for her eyes, wiping the tears. “How long has it been since he’s fucked somebody?”</p><p>“I don’t know, and I don’t wanna know,” Reno answered dryly. His eyebrow twitched in frustration as he tried his best to ignore his sister’s attitude. <em>Clearly</em>, she had no idea what she was getting herself into.</p><p>“Sounds <em>long</em>,”</p><p>“Hanney, listen to me,” Reno turned at her and his hand found her shoulder. “Rufus Shinra is not somebody you should be messing with,”</p><p>“No! It’s <em>papa </em>Shinra who shouldn’t be messing with <em>me</em>,” She poked a finger on his chest and Reno sighed.</p><p>“I’m doing it for your sake when I’m saying that you should walk up to him and end that fucking deal before it even fucking starts,”</p><p>“I’m not one to back off, and you know it, Reno,”</p><p>“You need to make an exception this time,” Both his hands found her shoulders as he stared down at his sister.</p><p>She might have been the oldest. She might have been the one who had basically <em>raised him after their mother gave them both up, </em>but he knew more about Shinra, and it was <em>his turn to protect her. </em></p><p>“I can’t, Reno,” She sighed. She hated to admit <em>but</em> “For once in my life, I’m beaten. My company is falling apart and it’s falling <em>fast.</em> This is the only quick solution that I can think of,”</p><p>“Fuck this company! You’re not gonna risk your life for it!” Reno insisted.</p><p>She chuckled and crossed her hands against her chest, shaking his arms off her shoulders. “Easy for you to say. You’re working for the company who’s crushing mine, <em>traitor</em>. You have no idea of the sacrifices I’ve made for <em>my</em> company. I -sure as hell- am willing to do more,”  </p><p>“Hannah, you’re my sister, I care about you, and for once, please, listen to me,” Reno had the most <em>serious </em>expression she had ever seen on his face. She sighed and walked out of the elevator once it reached the top and its doors opened.</p><p>“I make no promises,”</p><p>◄ ◊ ► ◄ ◊ ► ◉ ◄ ◊ ► ◄ ◊ ►</p><p>Indeed, there was a dress and makeup and time to put everything on. She knew Junon was far, and to make the distance in half an hour was only possible with a helicopter. One that the Vice President had visibly provided. Was <em>her </em>going to<em> him</em> so important? She didn’t really think it to be important. It was going to last <em>like what? </em>Ten minutes? <em>Twenty? </em></p><p>Yet, she couldn’t deny that she did have a pit in her stomach. It churned and twisted but <em>not in a bad way. </em>Everybody would want to sleep with the handsome son of the crazy rich businessman. The heir to the throne of the <em>biggest </em>company to have ever existed. She hated to admit, but her own company was far inferior. Still, it was the bitter truth, and she always accepted nothing but the truth.</p><p>The dress was exactly her size and she was sure that Reno had provided some information on that. It was a black, velvety fabric, with a V opening on the chest, but not large enough. Half her back was covered and it barely reached above her knees. And -<em>oh dear</em>- he had even bought her a pair of black heels. She had no mirror and no idea what to do with her hair, so she just let them loose and -<em>honestly</em>- <em>fuck the hair. </em>She never really cared. The blonde, wavy, long curls caressed her back in the movement of the night breeze as she walked out of the helicopter with her bag around her shoulder.</p><p>There was a large building that was certainly fit to be the residence of the Vice President for the last couple of years. Reno escorted her from the helipad and all the way back to the entrance of that very building. It seemed remote from the Junon City that probably lied a few more kilometres away, yet the building wasn’t something <em>extreme. </em>It was large, but normal. It housed one person only <em>anyway. </em></p><p>Reno opened the door for her and she entered, but stopped walking further when she noticed that he wasn’t following her. Reno stood outside, with his hands dipped in his pockets and a <em>not-so-very-pleased </em>look in his eyes.</p><p>“You just go all the way down the hall and enter the room to your right,” Reno said with a sigh.</p><p>“And then what do I do?” She raised an eyebrow.</p><p>“Call off the fuckin’ deal,” Reno said before he walked out, slamming the door shut.</p><p>She sighed as she turned and looked down the hall that spread in front of her. There were stairs leading upstairs but <em>heels and stairs </em>were never a combination that she was fond of. Besides, <em>Reno did say all the way down the hall. </em>The house looked bigger from the inside. It was all white and grey. Large canvases covered the walls and she didn’t really waste any of her time to stare at them. She just chuckled. <em>Greedy bastards. </em>She couldn’t even <em>hope </em>to have a similar house in the distant future even if she got to save her company. She never really cared about having a <em>fancy house </em>and a <em>fancy car. </em>For all she knew, most of the nights, she spent them passing out by her office, <em>trying </em>to keep her business <em>standing</em>.</p><p>It had been seven years. Seven years since she first established her company with the help of <em>nobody</em>. All that she could remember herself doing was <em>hustling. </em>Working, and working, <em>and working</em>. She would never complain. She had even brought Shinra in a tight spot, that is until Shinra <em>fucked her up </em>and <em>now </em>it was going to happen <em>literally. </em></p><p>Hannah didn’t hold back a laugh that reached her throat as she entered the room on her right, just like Reno had instructed. It was the living room, or <em>so it seemed</em>. <em>Huge. </em>Of course, it was huge. Expensive furniture with a large fireplace standing on the wall to the right. And -oh- <em>what do we have here? </em>A piano. A black, grand piano. It was open and she could even <em>hear it. Asking her</em> to come closer and start playing.</p><p>Grand pianos were always <em>amazing </em>to play at. Their sound was just different than the sound of wall, stand-up pianos. The one that she had in her own apartment.</p><p>Her fingers found the shiny, slippery surface of the piano. It looked old. Even though the black was a colour that would cover its age, the keys were an ochre colour that once must have been white. She sat on the bench and she didn’t really care whether he’d appreciate hearing her play, or whether it would be his cue to <em>punish </em>her somehow.</p><p>She didn’t care.</p><p>She just pressed a high note, and her left hand started immediately accompanying. It was a long story of <em>how </em>she learned playing. But an interesting tale <em>indeed. </em>Not one that she liked to think about though. <em>A minor. </em>The minors <em>are the sad scales. </em>There was something always so beautiful about <em>sad </em>melodies. Sad, and soft, and slow, and miserable, and lonely. Maybe the Minor scales were the only ones that could mirror something that she felt. She only played slow pieces, though. The fast ones demanded skill. Skill that she did not possess. </p><p>She didn’t know how long it took while she played. She just knew it took quite a while and -<em>honestly</em>- she didn’t want it to end. She didn’t want him to come. At some point, she just wanted to be left alone. She was tired, and hungry. It had been another tiring day at work and maybe agreeing to this deal was a bad idea. One that she had started to regret.</p><p><em>Well, fuck it. </em>These were the perks of being a businesswoman. She knew what she was getting herself into when she opened her company. Shinra, <em>used </em>the very <em>lifeblood </em>of their Planet for profit. It was a <em>terrible </em>mistake. One that she wanted to end <em>somehow</em>.</p><p>When she finished, she heard clapping. Slow, but loud clapping. She turned her head and saw Rufus standing by the entrance of the living room. He was dressed in this white, grey outfit, with the <em>ridiculous </em>amount of clothing layers, yet it still suited him. And then there was that sly smile across his lips while he pressed some of his weight against the wall by the entrance of the room, with his legs crossed.</p><p>“How long have you been standing there?”</p><p>“Long enough,” He approached her. “No stranger has touched those keys in quite a long time,”</p><p>“Then you should keep it closed,” she brought down the wooden fallboard. “Dust does not treat a piano well,”</p><p>“I shall keep that in mind,” Rufus lent a hand forward, for her to catch and help her up.</p><p>She just looked at his hand for a moment and neglected it. She stood up on her own and brought the bench closer, settling it beneath the piano before she turned to the Vice President. Hannah crossed her arms against her chest. She opened her mouth to speak, but he beat her to it.</p><p>“Food’s been served,” Rufus said before he turned around. “This way,”</p><p>She scoffed. <em>Great. </em>She will be wasting more than <em>twenty minutes </em>on this. She followed him though and kept her mouth shut. She knew if she’d part those lips of hers, she would be sending him <em>straight to hell. </em>But she would <em>send that deal to hell </em>well. The only deal that she hoped it would <em>save </em>her company.</p><p>And then an idea popped into her mind. <em>How does anyone choke on something purposely? </em></p><p>They reached the balcony where the table was set. It was large. There was the soft sound of the sea. The waves pushed and pulled, hugging the shore in a slow rhythm. There was that gentle breeze, slightly chilly, but not enough. It was April after all. And then there was the table, set in the middle where their dinner was served. He pulled back her chair for her to sit. She wasn’t expecting anything less from the son of the biggest businessman to have stepped on Gaia. <em>The biggest son of bitch as well. </em></p><p>He sat across her. The faint light of candles was the only thing that fell between them. He grabbed the bottle of wine. It looked old. <em>Of course, </em>it would be. <em>The older the better. </em>He popped it open like a bottle of champagne, and poured her a glass of the crimson, stiff, bitter liquid. But she didn’t grab the glass right away, nor did she start eating even though she was starving.</p><p>Could he have brought her there to poison her? It would make sense to poison the CEO of the only company that -at least- <em>tried </em>to stand in their way. Yet again, they were no longer rivals. She was forced to submit to this <em>deal. </em>Submit to this man that stood in front of her, and no matter how attractive he was, it was still just a deal. It was still just a desperate effort to save her company.</p><p>Hannah frowned as she grabbed the knife and the fork that rested beside her plate, and she started cutting through the beef that was served on her plate. It was delicious indeed, and her stomach growled for more but she knew she still had to silence it down, and collect herself. She had things to figure out.</p><p><em>How does one choke on something purposely? </em>She asked herself again, and then she realised that all she had to do was <em>breathe. </em>Breathe while <em>munching</em>. <em>Genius. </em>And it worked. <em>Hell yeah, it worked! </em>Next thing she knew, she was choking on a bite of food, and the <em>great </em>Vice President, of the <em>colossal company, </em>was on his feet, with wide eyes in alarm, pouring her a glass of water and patting her back. She would’ve laughed her <em>ass off </em>if she wasn’t limited on oxygen at the moment.</p><p>“Here, take a large sip,” Rufus instructed, handing her the glass and she did as he asked.</p><p>She swallowed down the food that was stuck in her throat, and she tried her best not to laugh. <em>Oh, </em>it was really worth it. She knew she had just met the Vice President, but that look on his face was <em>utterly </em>satisfying. He wiped it immediately though, and her vision was blurry enough from the tears that gathered from all that coughing. <em>Damn, </em>-she wiped the tears with a handkerchief, hoping that her makeup wasn’t ruined- she hadn’t seen much, but it was still <em>worth it. </em></p><p>His hand was still around her back as he looked down at her “Are you alright?” he asked, as he proceeded to sit back down to his chair across her.</p><p>“Yeah, thank you, Mr. Vice President. Excuse my carelessness. I can be quite… heedless, sometimes,”</p><p>“It’s alright, Ms. Sinclair,” He said, though, there was something about the way he said it. It was like he knew that she had done it on purpose. She hummed. <em>Smart, aren’t we? </em>It was so difficult to find a smart man. <em>So difficult. </em></p><p>“Though…” she caught his attention again. “…I would appreciate it if we sped things up. You and I both know wasted <em>time</em> is wasted <em>money</em>,” she took a sip from her wine and a smirk flashed across his lips.</p><p><em>Spoken like a true businesswoman. </em>“No dessert then,”</p><p>His butlers reached the table, gathering the dishes, the forks and knives, leaving only their glasses and the half bottle of wine. Icy blue eyes found hers when they were left alone once again. He gathered his hands in front of him on the table.</p><p>“365 <strong>hours</strong>,” He stated out of the blue and she found herself confused.</p><p>“Huh?”</p><p>“I give you three hundred and sixty-five hours to stay here. If you please me enough, I <em>might </em>consider saving your company,” He seemed dead serious about it even though she was certain <em>he must have been joking. </em></p><p>It was hilarious. <em>It was ridiculous. </em>She threw her head back and she laughed. She laughed till her stomach ached. “Fifteen <strong>days</strong>? Do you think my company will last fifteen <strong>days</strong>?” She wiped a tear that rolled down her cheek from the intense laughter. He maintained the serious look on his face no matter how much she laughed. Maybe he was being serious after all.</p><p>“Five billion tons of coal, am I correct?” His question ceased her laughter. “Isn’t that the amount you had to be extracted from Corel?” He leaned closer on the table. “We’ll start by 12,5% of the amount. It should more than suffice,”</p><p>She snickered, “And how are you going to convince your <em>dear </em>father to hand me six hundred and twenty-five million tons of coal? If I recall, you and your <em>dear</em> father aren’t on best terms,”</p><p>“My sources claim he’ll be dead by next week,”</p><p>At that her smile disappeared, replaced by an intrigued, serious look. “Now that’s interesting,” She admitted as she took another sip from her wine. “And how much will Shinra sell it for?”</p><p>“The price stays. However, you’ll do as I ask,” A smirk caught his lips as he brought his hands together, right below his nose. His eyes never leaving hers. “<em>Exactly </em>as I ask,”</p><p><em>Well, fuck. </em>Maybe <em>little brother </em>had a point when he said to never strike a deal with Shinra. But forty million tons of coal were <em>indeed </em>more than enough. It would last her company <em>more than a month. </em>Hannah sighed and she crossed her hands against her chest. She knew she was probably going to regret this. <em>No, </em>she was <em>definitely going to regret this. </em></p><p>“Alright,” she forced out. “Where do I sign?”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. would you, please, fuck me?</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><strong>GIVING HER A CONTRACT</strong> wasn’t quite what she had in mind when she asked <em>‘Where do I sign?’</em>, but at least <em>now she knew </em>she wouldn’t be getting home any time soon. She remained silent and so did he. Rufus Shinra wasn’t a man of many words, that much was clear. He wasn’t a spoiled brat either. A spoiled brat didn’t have such manners. But still, he always got what he wanted. He wanted the attractive woman he’d seen yesterday at the ball, and <em>now </em>he had her. He had trapped her with his manipulative words, and <em>pushed her in a cage. </em>One that she was afraid she might, one day, <em>not want </em>to escape.</p><p>Maybe he too was in a cage. One crafted by his very own father. Forced to live out <em>here</em>, away from the company and away from the City, with no chance to get back unless he was told to. She couldn’t imagine how it had felt like growing up as the son of that man. <em>The President</em>. A <em>jerk. No. ‘Jerk’ </em>couldn’t even begin to describe what he was. Nevertheless, this was still a mistake. A <em>terrible </em>mistake. But she had no other quick options, and time was of the essence. She hadn’t signed the contract yet though. He was giving her time and <em>that was</em> <em>something</em>, at least<em>. </em></p><p>The building was impressive. She slipped her gaze all around the white and grey walls, the wide corridors, as he led her upstairs, perhaps to his bedroom. She hadn’t asked where he was taking her. She didn’t have to. She knew what followed and she wasn’t sure whether she dreaded it or awaited it with impatience.</p><p>The bedroom was large and dark. He didn’t seem to care about switching on the lights. There was some moonlight coming from the window and maybe that was enough. The window was open, leading to a balcony. There was that small breeze that entered and brushed the grey curtain in a soft dance.</p><p>She would never admit, but she was so nervous that she was <em>shaking. </em>But she felt like laughing to herself about it. She had been through <em>so much worse. Well, </em>boyfriends? She had had many. But giving <em>body and soul </em>-so openhandedly- for business? She had done that before, and she was doing it again, and she knew it wasn’t the last time.</p><p>She had peeked a few times at the piece of paper that she carried in her hands. A contract asking her <em>to do whatever he asked. </em>She was forced to accept into being the <em>loyal dog </em>of the man that she <em>hated</em>. <em>Well, not as much as she hated his father. </em>But <em>now, </em>that she stood in that room. In this <em>darkness </em>with no one but that man and the closed door behind her, she was afraid of <em>what </em>he was going to ask of her. <em>What </em>he was going to do to her. She was going to think thoroughly about these before signing the contract. But she also had her company to save. <em>Yes. </em>She should stay focused on that.</p><p>She felt his hand slithering around her waist, pressing her back against his chest. Her breath hitched halfway down her throat and he noticed. He noticed the tension in her shoulders. Her hands that were brought together trying to ease the shaky movement. She was afraid, and he hated knowing that. But it made sense that she would be. They were strangers, after all.</p><p>His breath found her ear as he leaned in. He smoothed her hair over one shoulder. His lips were warm and dry as he trapped her earlobe between them gently. She shivered and bit her tongue. “Nothing will happen that you don’t want,” he whispered against her ear.</p><p>Were these words supposed to soothe her? <em>Well. </em>They did. He felt her muscles relaxing. He heard a sigh of relief coming from her as she finally released her hands and let them hang by her sides, still holding on to that piece of paper that was inevitably going to seal a bond between her and a man she barely knew. She had played that <em>game </em>before. She knew she couldn’t touch him unless he said so.</p><p>His hand slipped away from her waist, and back up. Warm fingers travelled from her belly, to her breasts, till he reached her neck. His fingers spread on her bare, white skin, squeezing slightly, forcing her to lean her head back against his shoulder. He looked down at her and she looked back up at him. With their eyes locked, his hand slipped away from her neck and reached for her dress.</p><p>He pulled down the sleeve, exposing her shoulder. Dry warm lips found her skin and she sighed, closing her eyes slightly. He gave a gentle bite on her shoulder, releasing a wave of shivers that coursed down her spine. But he stopped there. He stopped kissing, and withdrew. She turned around to face him, <em>confused</em>.</p><p>His hand found hers bringing it up and pressing a warm kiss on her knuckles. “Which means, I will not touch you without your consent, that is, until you sign the contract,”</p><p>His eyes found hers and she could discern their colour even in the dark. She raised an eyebrow. Again<em>- he must have been joking. </em>No one ever did that. Anyone else would just dig right in, and walk through the deal as fast as possible. No one cared about <em>what </em>she wanted. No one cared about <em>consent</em>. This was new. This was foreign to her. She wasn’t used to people asking her opinion on anything else but her company.</p><p>But Rufus Shinra wasn’t just <em>anyone. </em>He was a man of his word. He wasn’t going to touch her until she allowed him to. Maybe that’s why he was giving her 365 <strong>hours. </strong><em>Fifteen</em><em> <strong>days</strong></em>. Fifteen <strong>days</strong> to get to know him. Fifteen <strong>days</strong> to make her <em>his. </em>She would have laughed at thought if he wasn’t staring at her like that. The look of a hunter staring at his prey, though it was very well hidden beneath a mask of <em>kindness, </em>and <em>tenderness. Tender</em>? <em>Rufus Shinra?</em> <em>Tender? </em>It was unbelievable but there he was, promising things that no one ever did. He was a smart man. Intelligent unlike no other. He would make sure he let her know.</p><p>He let go of her hand and turned to leave. He stopped halfway to her door, as if he was reminded that he had something to say. “Reno will bring some stuff of yours by the morning. You should be able to settle in…” he turned and looked at her, “…breakfast is served at 9:00…” his eyes found hers and she found herself biting her tongue. “…don’t miss it.”</p><p>It sounded like a warning. Maybe he’d let her starve if she didn’t follow that order. He closed her door and she was left there, in the darkness of her <em>new room, </em>still dumbfounded unlike she had ever been.</p><p>She frowned as she switched on the lights and she stared at her new room. <em>What in the world had she gotten herself into? </em>Yet again, she had worked for the street gangs of Midgar’s Underworld -not just in the Undercities, but in the upper levels as well- so <em>sleeping in a fancy house of the son of a jackass </em>wasn’t something that should terrify her. And it didn’t.</p><p>She was going to settle in like he had asked. She was going to read that <em>damned </em>contract and whatever was in it, she knew she was going to sign it. She simply had no other option and <em>going back to her pals in Midgar’s Underworld </em>would be a <em>terrible </em>idea.</p><p><em>After everything that happened… </em>She shook her head. It was pointless to think of stuff that had happened and had long passed. It was time to go bed and she doubted she was in the mood to be reading contracts at this hour.    </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. would you, kindly, lemme fucking sleep</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><strong>THE NEXT MORNING</strong> was just like any other. She woke up with a terrible headache. A feeling identical to one of being hit by a truck. <em>Ah, yes, sweet, sweet morning sleep. </em>It always <em>sucked </em>when it came to her. Other people would wake up refreshed, whilst she would wake up feeling like a <em>zombie. </em>But maybe that was because of the nightmares. <em>So, so, so many nightmares, </em>all involving the past couple of years that she had tried so hard to forget. She wasn’t getting any sleep. She never really did. </p><p>Wishing she could die -once more- she turned and looked at the clock that ticked and ticked <em>and ticked </em>beside her on the wooden bedtable. <strong>11:27AM</strong>. She chuckled. That was <em>way </em>past nine. She just switched sides and shut her eyes again, burying her face further into the fluffy pillow of her bed, and further nuzzling into the bedsheets.</p><p>That bed wasn’t so bad. <em>As a matter of fact, </em>she had never slept in such a comfortable bed. It was soft, and the sheets were a dark grey, with a smooth silky and cool feel as they’d brush on her skin.</p><p><em>Well, </em>those were the perks of being the son of the President of the -currently- most successful company.</p><p>She knew she should probably have her stomach gurgling hungrily, and she should probably go find something to eat. But she wasn’t <em>hungry. </em>She was already too tired to get off the bed, and <em>honestly, </em>since she wouldn’t be going to work -not any time soon, at least- it was a great opportunity to just <em>sleep. </em>She had forgotten how good a long sleep felt. All these years all she did was work and work <em>and work, </em>trying to keep her company standing against Shinra.</p><p>Maybe she should have relied on other sources of energy than just <em>coal. Well, </em>no matter. The damage had been done. She couldn’t expect her engineers to figure out other power resources in <em>fifteen </em><strong><em>days</em></strong><em>. </em></p><p>She wasn’t sure whether she wanted to sign that contract or not. Unbeknownst to her, she was staring at that piece of paper that she had rested on her bedtable from last night. She frowned and she shut her eyes, switching sides once again. She didn’t want to do anything <em>for today. </em>All she wanted to do was fall asleep <em>again </em>and <em>never wake up. </em></p><p><em>Fuck </em>the contract. <em>Fuck </em>her company. <em>Fuck </em>Rufus Shinra. <em>Well, </em>that wasn’t far to come. She chuckled at the mental joke that she made and buried her hand further beneath her pillow whilst she rested her cheek on top. Her blonde hair was a mess against her pillow and <em>frankly, </em>she didn’t <em>give a shit </em>about it.</p><p>She didn’t know how much time passed until she heard footsteps in her room. She opened her eyes just to see her brother settling a couple of bags beside her bed.</p><p>“Morning, <em>traitor</em>,”</p><p>He let out a heavy sigh loudly. “It’s <strong>1:45PM</strong>,” he informed her and she laughed.</p><p><em>Holy crap! </em>“Time flies when you sleep, am I right?”</p><p>“You missed breakfast,” Reno said. He wasn’t so happy about <em>any </em>of this and she could pretty much tell from the look on his face.</p><p>“Oh, no, is your boss going to punish me about it?” she raised an eyebrow jokingly.</p><p>“He’s not even here,”</p><p>“Oh?” She settled a pillow on top of her head, shielding her eyes from the morning light that entered from the windows. “Then, where is he?”</p><p>“That’s classified, Hanney”</p><p>“Classified? Well, of course, <em>traitor</em>,”</p><p>A groan came from Reno “Stop with that!”</p><p>A smirk caught her lips. It was always so <em>hilarious </em>to get on her little brother’s nerves. She knew he hated that they were both working for the two rivalling companies even though they were siblings. She was sure people in Shinra probably didn’t even know he had a sister. She would never blame him for not telling. None of her employees knew that her own brother was a Turk.</p><p>She heard footsteps as he approached her bedtable and grabbed the contract and started reading. He scoffed and tossed the paper back down on the wooden piece of furniture.</p><p>“This is ridiculous! Are you actually considering this?!”</p><p>“Well, I’ve got fifteen <strong>days</strong> to decide. It’s either that or I lose my company,” She reasoned.</p><p>She felt weight on her bed as he sat beside her and pulled the pillow off her face. She shut her eyes trying to keep the sunshine out of her sensitive sight. Her face wrinkled in an expression of annoyance. Her hands reached out for her pillow again.   </p><p>“Give me back my pillow, you pillow-thieving jerk!”</p><p>“Tsk, tsk, tsk, where are your manners, Hanney? Calling your own brother a jerk.” He teased.</p><p>“You fuckin’ are!”</p><p>“That <em>fuckin’ jerk </em>just carried some of your useless stuff from Midgar all the way out here, and you’re still not listening to me when I say…” he grabbed the contract, “…do <em>not </em>sign this bullshit!”</p><p>At that, she opened her eyes, blinking a couple of times trying to adjust to the light. “You’re a <em>traitor, </em>you do not get to tell me what to do with <em>my </em>company,” She snatched back the pillow and settled it on top of her forehead, shielding her eyes once again.</p><p>Reno groaned irritatingly, “Honestly, going back to Corneo would make me feel less worried than knowing you’re doing… <em>this</em>,”</p><p>She sighed. “I can’t go back to the street gangs. You know how much it cost me trying to erase my… <em>previous employments.</em> I couldn’t be a CEO otherwise,”</p><p>Reno groaned once again in irritation. He knew his sister’s stubbornness more than anyone and he hated to admit it, but her stubbornness was probably all that helped her establish a <em>big ass </em>company. He stood back up, tossing the contract by her bedtable where it previously rested, and he walked around her bed to leave.</p><p>He opened the door, but he stopped halfway. “At least, reconsider your decision,” he advised. The smile that he always had on his face, for once, disappeared replaced by a worried look. “I don’t want to see you get hurt, sis,”  </p><p>“Sure thing,” she said and he was very much sure that the only reason she agreed was an effort to make him leave. He shook his head, cursing a couple of times before he walked out and shut the door behind him.</p><p>When she was once again alone, she pulled off the pillow from her head and stared at the white ceiling for a couple more minutes. She couldn’t deny that it was her cue to worry when Reno acted like that. He was chaotic and <em>stupid </em>most of the time, but being serious like that about something, was indeed something worrisome. Yet again, he could be working under his boss’s orders. If she gave up, then her company would inevitably <em>disappear </em>and there would be no one left to rival Shinra Corp. <em>He is a traitor, after all. </em></p><p>She got up and took a shower, and brushed her teeth before she went back to bed. She didn’t really want to walk out of this room, and since the Vice President wasn’t there, she really had no reason to. She crossed her legs as she nuzzled in her pitch-black sweater and took her time to stare at the contract. <em>Thank goodness, </em>Reno had brought her stuff. It took her a few minutes to settle in.</p><p>She settled the few changes of clothes in the closet beside her bed. She settled her laptop on the small table. She would have tried contacting her PA to give her a briefing of the current situation of the company, but she realised, she didn’t have the password of the network. She groaned and just abandoned the idea of working <em>for today at least. </em>Her phone was charging, and she was left sitting cross-legged on her bed, with her glasses resting on top of her nose, and the contract in her hands.</p><p>She frowned the more she read. He was basically asking her <em>to</em> <em>do everything he asked </em>whatever that meant, and not question it. <em>Am I applying to become a Turk or something? </em>Instead, she wasn’t asked to <em>kill, </em>but she was asked to let him do <em>everything </em>he wanted with her, in exchange for 12,5% of the five billion amounts of coal that she had ordered from Corel. He said he would take out his father sooner or later and she -honestly- found that <em>very </em>tempting.</p><p>She sighed. No matter the appeal, it still didn’t feel <em>right.</em> Well, nothing ever felt right when it came to business. She had been through <em>so much worse, </em>this shouldn’t be bothering her <em>so much. </em>Hannah rested the contract back on the bedtable and she lied back down on the bed. An instant feeling of warmth and comfort came the second she lied down. She always loved beds so much.</p><p>Once again, she ignored the gurgling sound of her empty stomach, and she pulled the bedsheets back over her body. She tried her best to wipe the memory of last night. But she had finished with settling her stuff, and taking a shower, and reading the contract, and she had nothing else to do to distract her.</p><p>She could still feel the warmth of his lips as he pressed kisses on her bare shoulder. His arms that were tight around her waist. His warm fingers that spread on her stomach. His soft voice, and the warmth of his breath as it brushed against her ear. She had to shake her head and cast those <em>ridiculous </em>thoughts away.</p><p>There was no doubt that Rufus Shinra <em>had it all. </em>The appearance, the intelligence, the <em>money</em>. But she wasn’t one of those women who would <em>kill </em>to be there. Those women had zero self-respect. She, at least, had some dignity, and <em>didn’t want </em>to be there, no matter how <em>alluring </em>he could be.</p><p>She didn’t care how long she stared blankly at a random spot in her room, but she knew it was minutes later when she heard a voice that startled her to the core.</p><p>“Enjoying your new bed?”</p><p>She couldn’t remember if she let out a yelp, but she knew she jumped up and looked at the direction the voice came from. She couldn’t believe it was the Vice President. She instantly looked at the clock beside her bed.</p><p><strong>4:16PM</strong>.</p><p>Time flies <em>indeed</em>.</p><p>She looked back at the man who was sitting on the armchair across her bed. He had his tie loosened with three buttons of his white shirt unbuckled. He wore black pants and for once he wasn’t wearing all those layers of clothing. His elbow rested by the arm of the armchair as he rested his cheek against the palm of his hand while he stared at her.    </p><p>She tried to ignore the heat that caught her cheeks. <em>Damn him. How did he get in here? </em>And <em>how long has he been standing there? </em>She couldn’t quite tell, but it was <em>his</em> house, after all. He could walk in and out of any room <em>whenever</em>. She lied back down on the bed and pushed the sheets further up her body, trying her best to ignore him.</p><p>“Quite,” she answered briefly.</p><p>“You missed breakfast… and lunch,” He reminded her, and she shrugged, suddenly finding the ceiling a <em>very interesting place to look at.</em></p><p>“You’re gonna… punish me for it?” she raised an eyebrow.</p><p>An amused chuckle came from him. “No,” He got up and approached her.</p><p>He climbed on the bed and for a moment she was about to cower away, but he didn’t seem to be a threat. He didn’t seem <em>dangerous, </em>even though he crawled on top of her. His body hovered above hers as she lied back down. Their eyes met. He had a smirk on his lips. The smell of his cologne reached her senses whilst his hands propped himself on top of her on the soft mattress, at the level of her head. His knees planted around her waist. He had her trapped but she did not feel <em>scared</em>.</p><p>There was something so <em>oddly </em>amusing about the way his icy eyes traced her body. He wasn’t touching her. He just had her pinned down, trapped between his body and the soft mattress of her bed. He wanted to take her, <em>right here, right now, </em>but he was holding back and that much was clear. It was so amusing to know that <em>not signing the contract </em>was a torture for him. One that she knew she was going to try to delay for as long as possible.</p><p>His platinum hair, for once, messily fell on his forehead. His white shirt had just a few buttons unbuckled, and only revealed some of his skin beneath, but it was still a sight that was difficult to neglect. His black tie was loosely passed around his neck, and <em>now </em>hung, barely touching her own chest, as he stared down at her.</p><p>Her blonde hair had a few black locks merged beneath, one tiny detail that he didn’t expect to <em>like</em>. But what he liked the most, was that she wasn’t cowering away like anyone else would have. She was just staring up at him, returning the smirk and the confidence that he himself possessed.</p><p>He peeked at the contract on the bedtable, and he was disappointed to find that she hadn’t signed. He smirked. <em>Yet. </em></p><p>“If you like the bed so much, I could join you…” he leaned in, till their lips were just inches apart and his nose was barely brushing against hers.</p><p>He breathed against her lips. Her eyes focused on his own. They were wet and soft and for a moment all she wanted was to lift her head up and finally <em>fucking </em>kiss him. But, <em>no</em>, she couldn’t give in. It was exactly what he wanted. It was exactly why he had her trapped beneath him, and it was exactly why he was looking at her like that.</p><p>His lips found her cheek as he dragged his way towards her ear. She closed her eyes, cursing her body and her hands that trembled in need. Her hands twitched. She wanted to touch him. She wanted to tangle her fingers into his silky hair and maybe pull that tie and that shirt away. She tried her best to hold back and scold herself for her heavy breathing.</p><p>But then he let out a low chuckle against her ear and she found herself biting her lip and her hand reaching for his shoulders. He caught her hand right away, forcing it back down and pinning it against the pillow beside her head. “…not until you sign the contract,” he reminded her, before he let go of her hand and slipped away from her.</p><p>He stood back up and he tugged his tie away from around his shoulders, gathering it in a fist in his hand. Rufus turned around to leave and she was just left there, desperately trying to ease her breathing, and ignore the heat that had started awakening between her legs.</p><p>“Oh,”</p><p>He stopped halfway to her door with another chuckle as he turned and looked at her, as if he had just remembered something. His hand dipped into his pocket and he pulled something out, tossing it back at her. She caught it with her fast reflexes right away.</p><p>“I came to give you this back,” He turned around again to leave. “I expect you to wear it tonight at dinner,” he said before he closed her door shut.</p><p>Hannah stood in silence for a moment, with her teeth gritted, and those black knickers in her hands. That moment she knew, she wasn’t going to last long from signing the contract.</p><p>She punched the mattress.</p><p><em>Damn him! </em>      </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. would you, please, stop making me want to enjoy this fucking contract?</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><strong>HANNAH SINCLAIR</strong> wasn’t one to back off easily. Her stubbornness was <em>indeed </em>all that helped her establish a company from the ground up. She never backed down in her life, and she wasn’t going to back down <em>now. </em>She walked out of her room and proceeded downstairs. She hadn’t taken the time to memorise the endless maze of halls and corridors of the building, and she didn’t really care to do so. She knew she was going to be spending most of her time in her room since eating wasn’t really a necessity.</p><p>No matter how much her stomach growled, she was just used to being hungry. Being hungry was a lesson she had learned in the harshest of ways when she was little. She chuckled bitterly and shot the thought away. She had been through so much, much worse than <em>this. </em>Giving her body to a man such as Rufus Shinra had started sounding less than a curse and more like a fortunate outcome of this entire ordeal.</p><p>She had given her body to much, <em>much worse </em>people.</p><p>But these days were long gone, and her pride was restored when she opened her company. Maybe that company was all that she owned, and that’s why she was so desperate to keep it. She had <em>fought </em>so hard trying to <em>keep it. </em></p><p>Hannah stared at the contract once more, before she proceeded to walk out of her room. She had a dinner to <em>attend </em>and as much as she hated it, she was going to pass out if she didn’t eat at least something for <em>today</em>. But she stared at the contract and all she thought about was her company. The importance of keeping it working outweighed all other intentions. <em>Sure, </em>she -more than adored- the idea of torturing that desperate man, but her company was more important than a <em>silly game</em>. It was more important than her self-esteem, self-respect, her values.</p><p>She chuckled mockingly on the last one. <em>Values? </em>She never had the luxury of having <em>values</em>. Both herself and her brother were <em>stripped </em>of their <em>values </em>when they were abandoned in the streets of Wall Market.</p><p>She let another bitter chuckle as she thought of those long-gone, childhood days. Her hand reached for her temple as she sat back down on the edge of her bed. She hadn’t realised her hand was shaking as she rubbed the ache that had started gathering on her temple. It was either a side-effect of her starvation or just the memories that crept back to her.</p><p>She gritted her teeth. <em>No. </em>These days were long gone and she was a different person <em>now. </em>She had a place in this <em>wretched</em> world and that was her company, and she couldn’t lose it. <em>No matter the cost. </em>She sighed exasperatedly as she grabbed a pen and did what she knew she was inevitably going to regret.</p><p>She signed the paper and carried it with her downstairs. She navigated herself within the Vice President’s residence, till she found the dining room where she found him waiting. She wasn’t expecting herself to remember where that was, but she always had a good memory<strong>. </strong></p><p>As expected, he was sitting on his side on the table. He hadn’t touched the food yet, instead he had a book in his hands. A title that she didn’t quite catch. It looked old, wrapped in black leather. He was wearing a white shirt. His sleeves were slightly rolled up over his elbows. He was wearing a black, loosened tie, and two, or three buttons of his shirt were unbuttoned. He wore black pants, with a pair of glasses that rested at the tip of his nose. A focused expression laid across his face as he read, dedicated to the contents of the book that he held.</p><p>She didn’t know he wore glasses to read, but -<em>oh boy</em>- they suited him. His bright blue eyes stared behind the lenses. It was obvious that he had noticed her standing there. Though the food was served, he hadn’t started eating. <em>Not yet</em>. He was waiting for her.</p><p>Her stomach growled at the smell of the freshly roasted, garnished steak that was served on her plate. A plate filled with green salad rested in the middle, and a bottle of red wine rested on the side. She made her way towards the table that stood in the middle of the grand veranda. There was a soft night breeze that slipped past her clothes, as she approached the Vice President and handed him the contract.</p><p>A smirk flashed at the corners of his lips as he looked at the signed paper and then he looked up at her. <em>She resisted long enough</em>. His hand reached for the paper and she pulled it back before he could take it. He looked up at the cold look on her face.</p><p>“I want you to know that I only do it out of great necessity, and nothing more,” she rested the paper beside his plate and she turned to reach for her seat.</p><p>She was wearing a different dress this time. It was black, and her back was exposed until her waist. The sheath dress reached above her knees. It had a straight cut and was nipped at the waistline, complimenting her curves. He found his gaze resting on the exposed, white skin of her back. Her hair was picked up in a bun, with a bang falling at the left side of her face. She wore no makeup except for maybe that blood-red lipstick. She didn’t look like she needed to put anything more to make herself <em>beautiful</em>.</p><p>Her fingers found the table, and before she sat down, she turned to look at him, “You have me cornered, Mr. Vice President…” she bit her tongue, “…I give you credit for that,”</p><p>She sat down and he took off his glasses after making sure everything was settled with the contract. He put aside, the contract, the book, and his glasses and ran a hand through the silky platinum strands of his hair, pushing them away from his forehead.</p><p>“On the contrary, it is my <em>dear father </em>that has you cornered. I simply wish to help,” Rufus said and he heard a bitter, doubtful chuckle coming from her as her hands reached for the fork and the knife. He frowned. “You realise that signing that contract means that you’re at my full submission, consensually,”</p><p>She pursed her lips in displeasure. “Yes,”</p><p>“Good, then…” his hands reached for his own fork and knife before he started cutting through the steak. “…my first order is <em>eat</em>. I did not bring you here to starve,”</p><p>She tried her best not to throw a murderous glare at the man. “Yes, sir,”</p><p>She cursed mentally. She was never going to get used to it. She was never the submissive kind, but for once, maybe she could change her ways. Besides, the contract stated clearly. <em>After </em><em>365 </em><strong><em>hours</em></strong><em> of service, the client is free to recede. </em></p><p>So, she just had to make it through this for <em>fifteen </em><strong><em>days</em></strong><strong>. </strong><em>How hard can it be? </em></p><p>They had their dinner in a comfortable silence. She was in no mood to get to know him, and neither was she in the mood to talk about the fake past that she had constructed for herself. Though, she was sure, that the Turks would have no problem discovering everything about her. All those things that she had done, that she had tried so, <em>so</em> hard to erase.</p><p>She couldn’t deny that from the brief looks that she stole from the man sitting across her, he <em>indeed </em>had it all. A well-built body beneath that white shirt of his. His hair, a beautiful blonde. A few locks found their way on his forehead whilst he delicately chewed on the delicious meat. But other than that, she tried her best to oblige to her body’s need for food. She hadn’t realised she was starving until she started eating.</p><p>Her dress was one that she usually wore during professional meetings. She found all of her dresses were the same. She didn’t have the time, nor the money to spend on expensive dresses that she would never use. Being a CEO required dedication. Her salary was the lowest compared to the one of all the other employees in her company. Simply, all the money that she made was invested in her company. </p><p>“I trust you find the food to your liking?” Rufus said, cutting the silence.</p><p>She shot him a confused look. <em>Does it matter whether I like it or not? </em>This was probably the first time he was doing this. The first time to <em>hire </em>someone for such… <em>services</em>. Her previous <em>employments</em> were much <em>different. </em>She doubted it though. She was sure that he was just playing nice.</p><p>She pushed all thoughts aside, and she just nodded, avoiding his gaze once more. “It’s… delicious,”</p><p>He let out a pleased hum, before his hand reached for his glass of wine. It took a few more minutes of silence, whilst they finished dinner and now it was time for dessert.</p><p><em>Éclair</em>.</p><p>Hannah looked down at the fresh set of cutlery that was handed to her and she raised an eyebrow. Was she supposed to eat it with a fork and a knife? Usually she would just scoop it up with her hand and eat it like a <em>normal person. </em></p><p>She looked over at Rufus and noticed that he wasn’t having dessert. Rather he only kept the glass of wine, taking another sip. She raised an eyebrow. “No dessert for you, Mr. Vice President?”</p><p>He shook his head “There’s no need to be formal, Hannah. You may call me ‘Rufus’ if you so wish,”</p><p><em>Now that was unreal. </em>“Alright, Mr-” she cut herself “…uh …<em>Rufus</em>,”</p><p>A smirk flashed across his lips as she spoke his name. Her hand reached for the knife and her fork. She grimaced as she stared at the soft, fresh éclair wondering <em>how in the world she was supposed to eat it.</em> She sighed. This wasn’t going to work. She set both the knife and the fork down.</p><p>She didn’t really <em>give a shit </em>if she would disgust him by eating it with her hands. <em>Disgusting </em>him was probably a good idea at this point. “Please excuse my impropriety,”</p><p>She grabbed the éclair in her hands and took a bite. She heard a chuckle coming from him, but she didn’t pay much attention. The bittersweet taste of the black chocolate icing merged well with the delicious, smooth cream that was trapped between the oblong pastry. <em>Oh Gaia- </em>it was delicious. The food was at least something that she was going to thoroughly enjoy out of this deal. A touch of cream rested beside her lower lip, and her hand reached immediately for the handkerchief to wipe it away.</p><p>“Allow me,” Rufus offered as he reached out, with his own handkerchief in his hand.</p><p>She let him wipe that cream off her lips with a gentle brush of the soft cloth. His eyes never once left hers as he pulled back and brought the handkerchief close to his lips.</p><p>Her scent reached his senses. A mixture of lavender from her and vanilla from the cream. His tongue snuck out, gathering the cream from the handkerchief, piercing her gaze with his own. Hannah shifted uncomfortably in her seat as she took another bite of her éclair. The sweet white cream spread on her tongue before she swallowed it down and she tried her best to look anywhere but him.</p><p><em>Damn him. </em>She wasn’t supposed to find this <em>hot. </em>She was supposed to hate that man, not starting to think that this contract was actually a <em>good idea. </em>Hannah tried her best to focus on her dessert, and once she had finished eating it, her fingers were left with the sticky syrup that the éclair’s dough had in it. Her hand reached for her own handkerchief, to wipe her fingers, but she never got to do it.</p><p>“Lick them,” came the command from the man who sat across her.</p><p>She was caught halfway. She put down the handkerchief and instead looked at the icy blue eyes of the Vice President. She could tell he was biting his tongue. A few strands of his hair had found his forehead and she wanted nothing but to mess those locks with her own fingers.</p><p><em>Oh- </em>she had played that game before. She knew she could do nothing but what he asked. <em>Exactly </em>what he asked. She parted her lips and slipped a finger inside her mouth. She met the sweet taste of the syrup that was stuck on her finger. She closed her lips around it and drew away the sticky liquid with her tongue. She did the same with her other finger and she couldn’t help but stare at Rufus’ reaction.</p><p>It was so amusing to know that with merely <em>sucking</em> her fingers, she had the Vice President of the <em>great </em>Shinra Corp, hot and bothered. He loosened his tie a little bit more, and rested against the back of his chair. He bit the thumb of his hand that was propped on top of the table.</p><p>His butlers walked in to gather the dishes and whatever was left on the table. They made a quick work of it, before they vanished back into the house.</p><p>“Come here,” Rufus ordered again and she obediently got up and approached him.</p><p>He got up pushing the chair a bit further away from the table so that there was enough space for her to settle between him and the table. His breath brushed warm against her lips and he made another step closer, forcing her to make another step back till her hips met the edge of the wooden table. He closed the remaining space between them.</p><p>He looked down at her but she wasn’t looking up at him. She was trying to look <em>anywhere </em>but him. She couldn’t be getting turned on by <em>this</em>. This is <em>ridiculous. </em>She wanted to scold <em>so hard </em>at herself for being this way. For the wet heat that gathered between her legs, and maybe, meeting those <em>desperate </em>eyes of his, things were going to get much, <em>much</em> worse.</p><p>“Look at me, Hannah,”</p><p><em>Damn you, Rufus Shinra! </em>She did as she was asked and she hadn’t realised how <em>perfect </em>he was. Seeing him up close like that. White, flawless skin, light-green eyes. Perfect, soft lips. Platinum-white, silky hair that she wanted nothing but to tangle her fingers into them and push him down to her, and catch those lips between hers.</p><p>His hands reached for the table around her, making sure he had her there, trapped and at his mercy. Making sure to let her know that she was nothing but a helpless pawn, awaiting for its Master’s orders.</p><p>She breathed shakily, not really sure if this contract was a terrible or a terrific idea. <em>How can something be both? </em></p><p>He leaned in and his lips found hers. She let him in when his tongue met hers, and she tasted whatever was left of that cream on his tongue, accompanied with the sweet smell of wine. She drowned in it. Her hands twitched, suppressing the need to touch him. She wanted to grasp on his shirt and pull him close. She couldn’t do that though. Not until he asked.</p><p>But she found her eyes closing. She felt a sigh escaping her when his tongue met hers, and his scent, his taste filled her senses. He smelt of wine and an expensive cologne that she had smelled only once before. <em>Of course, he did. </em></p><p>He lapped his tongue against hers once more and a moan escaped her throat. <em>No. </em>She was enjoying this far too much. Usually, by <em>now </em>she should be feeling grossed out and disgusted, and inclined to pull back and walk away. But she didn’t feel any of this. For once in her life, she was going to enjoy doing <em>this</em>.</p><p>His hands found her waist. She felt his fingers digging on her dress and bringing her closer, clutching around her clothed hips whilst he deepened the kiss. His tongue found her throat and she gasped for air. But he didn’t seem to care, he just deepened the kiss and bit on her lip till it was rosy and swollen.</p><p>One hand reached for her hair, and with a swift move they were released from the bun, and they were brought down her shoulders. A thumb brushed warm against her cheek and she dug her fingers in the wooden edge of the table behind her, trying her best not to touch him.</p><p>He pulled back from the kiss and his lips dragged their way to her cheek. “Loosen my tie and unbutton my shirt, Hannah,”</p><p>She did as he had asked and he couldn’t help but admit that he was impressed. He could have never imagined that that stubborn woman that he’d met at the ball that night, was capable of such obedience. He hadn’t asked Reno much about her past. Maybe it was time he had the Turks make a thorough investigation on what she had tried so hard to erase. Nevertheless, he pressed kisses down her cheekbone till he found her neck.  </p><p>He trapped her skin between his lips, nipping slightly on her pulse point. She let out a silent gasp and she let her head roll back, giving him more space. She blindly undid his tie and the buttons of his white shirt, one by one whilst she felt his hands, hotly tracing over her waist, her back, her hips, bringing their bodies closer. She was pressed against his strong frame while the hard edge of the table dug in her hips.</p><p>Once she had done what he asked, she tried to touch him even though she hadn’t yet been given permission to do so. But she couldn’t help it. She wanted to push his shirt away and reveal more of his skin beneath. <em>Damn you. </em>She wasn’t supposed to be enjoying this.</p><p>He grabbed her hands before she had the chance to touch him. His grip was tight around her wrists, as he pulled back and looked down at her. Her breathing, uneasy and heavy, pupils, dilated. He was more than proud to see his effect on her, because, no matter how <em>hard to get</em> she was trying to play, there was no doubt she was <em>more </em>than enjoying this. </p><p>“Turn around,” He commanded. His voice, lower than he’d expected it to be. It sent shivers down her spine as she turned around just like he had asked.</p><p>One hand slithered around her waist, making sure her back was pressed against his chest. The other hand smoothed her hair to the side, revealing her nape and some of the bare skin of her back. He leaned in. His lips found the back of her shoulder, whilst his hands worked on unzipping her dress. He slipped it off of her, and before she even knew it, her dress lied on top of her heels. She stepped out of it and her muscles clenched in anticipation. She hadn’t imagined he would take this slow.</p><p>His hand found her belly once again. She was half-naked. His skin was hot upon hers as he pulled her back against his chest. His bulge brushed against her rear. He let out a breathy chuckle against her ear as he noticed she was wearing those same black panties. Once again, she had done as he had asked.</p><p>“Good girl,” he whispered in her earlobe, before his hand slipped down, slipping beneath her knickers and meeting the soaking heat that she had tried so hard to contain -to no avail, whatsoever. His index finger brushed against her clit. Slick and quivering. Her breath hitched halfway down her throat as he gave it a strong jerk. Her body pushed back against his and her hands reached for the table.</p><p>He let out another chuckle as he pushed two fingers in and she gasped. Her head rolled back against his shoulder as her tight walls sheathed him. His other hand reached for one of her breasts, pulling down the black bra and giving her nipple a tight pinch. She let out another gasp and he started moving his fingers inside of her.</p><p>He started slow, massaging in and out. She was so wet; he couldn’t help that smirk that caught his lips. Her back arched, her body pressed back against his once more when he picked up the pace. His fingers slipped deeper and he bit on her shoulder when she let out another gasp. This wasn’t enough. He wanted to hear her <em>scream</em>.</p><p>He hit against a spot that made her whole body tense and her hole clench. She bit her lip, trying not to make any more sounds than those gasps. She didn’t want to let him know to what extent she was enjoying this, but she knew it was too late <em>now </em>and there was no use in trying.</p><p>He quickened the pace and she pushed against him once more. He tapped and tapped and <em>tapped </em>against her sensitive spot until she came. She came with a cry and a gush of liquids slipping down her bare thighs. Her legs shook beneath her and her hands reached for support from the table once she realised, he wasn’t going to stop there.</p><p>She found herself facing the cold, wooden surface of the table, breathing hard and pressing her forehead against it. Her whole body clenched as he brought her hard down her orgasm, with a few more harsh thrusts before he pulled his fingers out of her, and gave her a moment to breathe.</p><p>She heard him unbuckling his belt and pulling down the zip of his trousers. He rolled down her knickers, tossing them somewhere in the room. Heavy, but measured, warm breaths brushed against her back as he leaned in and gathered her hands behind her back, tying them there with his belt. He fastened the grasp of the leather around both her wrists. She was so exposed, and so weak to do anything <em>now. </em>She was tied and at his mercy and she hated herself for how much she <em>liked</em> their little, <em>wicked game</em>.</p><p>She pressed her cheek on the surface of the table, trying to steal a glance from the back. His hair fell messily on his forehead. He had rolled his sleeves up over his elbows, and his lips glistened in saliva. <em>How dare he be so handsome? </em>And then she scolded at herself mentally once more.</p><p>He stroked himself before he guided his tip at her opening. Her lips parted in a silent cry as he pushed in. He filled her all the way in stretching her tight hole, reaching her far end. He let out a low groan that he had failed to hold back. She was so wet, and warm and tight. He gave them both a moment to adjust before he began moving.</p><p>His hand found her hair, fisting into the messy blonde locks and pulling hard, making her back arch and another gasp erupt from her lips. He pulled all the way out and thrust back in, hitting that spot and making her bite her tongue. She shut her eyes as he picked up the pace once again. Pulling in and out a little bit faster, and a little bit harder, each time hitting that spot and accelerating.</p><p>She tried to look back only to steal a glimpse of his body pounding mercilessly against hers. His hips hit hard and his hand fisted in her hair as he pulled her off the table and forced her back to crush against his chest. He breathed hard against her ear as her head landed on his shoulder and she shut her eyes.</p><p>“Are you going to come for me again?” he growled against her ear and she gritted her teeth.</p><p>She let out another cry when she came. Her body crushed back down against the table. Her hands twitched as she tried to reach for support, but they were still tight around her back and he was still taking her, <em>fucking</em> her through her orgasm till she was left helpless and shaking. Her body ached in exhaustion, but he didn’t seem to be done with her.</p><p>He pulled out of her only to unbuckle her hands and toss the belt away. Her wrists ached and she reached for support on the table when she realised her legs were no longer an option. His hands found their way around her waist, supporting her on her feet as he flipped her around, and picked her up, settling her body easily on top of the table.</p><p>He settled himself between her legs before he pushed back in. She let out another cry. Her head rolled back. Her eyes shut tight. Her legs closed around him as he stilled deep inside of her and dragged his lips all the way back to her ear.</p><p>“You may touch me now, Hannah,” he allowed her, and her hands reached immediately for his shirt.</p><p>Her hands snuck beneath his shirt, tracing his shoulders, his chest, till she found his neck. Her fingers found his cheeks and she guided him back down to her to catch his lips once more. He complied, catching her mouth with his and swirling his tongue against hers, tasting her. His hands tightened around her waist whilst they kissed.</p><p>He slipped back down on her neck, biting hard, adding another bruise and making her gasp again. Her hands found his hair. Finally, tangling into the blonde, silky locks and pulling him closer while he nipped and bit and licked on her neck. She had a feeling she wasn’t going to like what she’d see in the mirror tomorrow.</p><p>He pulled out and thrust back in, harder this time, knocking a cry out of her. He did it again, and again, <em>and again</em> until he picked up a pace that made the table creak beneath them. She tensed up again. She couldn’t believe she was ready to come <em>again</em>. But her eyes shut and every thrust was absolute bliss. Her head rolled back and the screams erupted from her throat one by one. He was licking and biting and marking her and for a moment she didn’t mind. She loved the wet stinging pain that came from her neck. Her burning nerves that stirred up once again between her legs for release.</p><p>His hand fisted in her hair, pushing her head back whilst he pounded into her and he pulled back to look at her. She let out a final shout before she came again. Her whole body shook and she dug her nails into his shoulders.</p><p>He pulled out of her, stroking himself till he came with another growl against her thighs. Both panted hard, taking a moment to catch their breath, before he zipped his pants back up and he looked up at her. He hadn’t realised she had lied back down on the table. Her body exhausted, totally spent. He tried not to smirk as he ran a hand through his messed-up hair.</p><p>She shook her hand. “You go. I’ll just… take a nap here,” she said breathlessly. <em>Letting a lady sleep on a table</em> was way beneath him.</p><p>“I’m afraid I have to object,” His hands slipped around her, gathering her limp body in his arms. He didn’t look like he was putting any effort into carrying her.</p><p>She let her head rest back on his hand, and she raised an eyebrow in confusion. Was he <em>actually going to take her to bed?</em></p><p>This was unreal.</p><p>
  <em>Rufus Shinra was unreal. </em>
</p><p>“Your kindness knows no bounds, sir,” </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. would you, please, stop being so fucking good at this?</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> <strong> SHE HADN’T SLEPT </strong> so well in <em>years</em>. Maybe it was because of the starvation and the exhaustion that she had experienced the previous day. But -<em>oh Gaia</em>- she hadn’t gotten so <em>thoroughly fucked </em>in so long. She found herself staring at the ceiling of her room with nothing but thoughts of what had happened that night. <em>The night before the previous one. </em></p><p><em>Yes, </em>there had already been two days since that night. It was the other morning that the staff let her know that he’d be missing for the next two days and where to, it was <em>classified </em>as they had stated. She could contact her PA and work online. It turned out they had told everybody that she had some weird, tropic, highly infectious disease and she couldn’t attend work for <em>months</em>.</p><p><em>Damn you, Rufus Shinra. </em>She was never one not to go work because of some flu. Nevertheless, after finishing another online meeting with her assistants and the other executives, she let her laptop rest and she just went back to bed. Maybe she could take advantage of that, and get all the rest that she had neglected for so many years trying to build a company.</p><p>All those sleepless nights. All those <em>sacrifices. </em>She was making another sacrifice <em>now </em>but she wasn’t sure how to feel about it. Was it really a sacrifice? Was it really a bad idea?</p><p>For all she knew, she was in a huge house, with delicious meals served at all times for free, and the only price was… not really a bad price? <em>Sure, </em>morally it wasn’t right, but she knew better than anybody that there’s no morality when it comes to business.</p><p>He owned her, though. For fifteen <strong>days </strong>he owned her.</p><p>But she genuinely didn’t find anything to complain about. Or at least, he had yet to give her a reason to complain about. She had twelve more days. She nodded to herself as she stared at the ceiling of her room. She could make it twelve more days. <em>Right? </em></p><p>It was just after noon. He was supposed to return by the night. She had nothing else to do but wait. Instead of waiting in her room, she got up and made her way downstairs, meeting a maid in the hall, and greeting her with a smile. Hannah made her way down the staircase and with little effort, she found the living room.</p><p>It was the first room that she had entered when she got there. It was where the piano rested. She pulled the fallboard back up and sat down on the bench. Her fingers were cold as they brushed against the ochre, shiny keys. Playing with cold fingers was a terrible idea.</p><p>But she didn’t care in the least. It wasn’t like she knew playing difficult pieces that usually required a warm-up.</p><p>She had learned to play during her time in Wall Market. Actually, playing the piano in the ‘Drunkards’ bar was the first job that she actually liked. <em>The only job </em>that she liked back then. She remembered <em>the day</em>.</p><p>The day that they walked out of a car, and that car left. It was the day that their mother had abandoned them. She was ten-years-old. Reno was eight. She remembered they spent two more years, begging in the dangerous streets of Wall Market. There was no one there for them. They had nothing but each other. She was the oldest. She had tried her best to raise Reno. To be both the mother, and the sister, and the father that he deserved.</p><p>And in doing so, she lost her <em>dignity. </em>Reno was too little to help. The only job that promised enough income for both of them was the only job that she wanted to avoid. Alas, she couldn’t avoid it. She could still feel <em>their</em> hands on her body. Her shouts were still loud in her ears as she would try to fight back, desperate to push them away. <em>Useless efforts</em>. They never stopped what awaited her.</p><p>But she was scared back then. She was fourteen when it began.</p><p>That’s why <em>now</em>, all these years later, she wasn’t afraid to sign such contracts. She couldn’t have something taken from her that she hadn’t already lost.</p><p><em>Men are disgusting. </em>She didn’t mean it for all, though. She had just seen so much in such a short time. And <em>now </em>she was pressing those keys, playing something slow. She couldn’t quite hear what she was playing as her vision grew blurry once she recalled such memories.</p><p> She should have never thought of these. But sometimes she couldn’t help it. The memories were still hers, and there were so many nights that she’d wake up from the nightmares and she’d cry herself back to sleep. She had sacrificed so much so that her little brother could attend the Turk Academy like he had always wanted. And now, he was working for the company that was crushing hers. She frowned. Traitor.</p><p>Something warm and slick slipped down her cheek and she stopped playing. Her hand reached for her face. She wiped that tear right away. She was glad she was alone. Only when she was alone could she allow herself to cry. Another lesson she’d learned from Wall Market.</p><p><em>Don’t let them think you’re not enjoying it or else they’re going to pay half the price. </em>She wiped another tear that slipped down her other cheek, and after making sure her eyes were dry, she continued playing. Playing the piano always helped. Besides, not all of it was <em>that </em>bad.</p><p>There was an old man in the ‘Drunkards’ bar. He was the one who had taught her how to play. The only good man that she knew in that wretched place. He owned that bar. He had helped them go through the first four years. He was the father she never had. Of course, <em>now</em>, he was <em>gone</em>. One good man could not survive long surrounded by so many bad<em>, bad </em>people.</p><p>“Excuse me, ma’am,” The voice of a maid drew her attention and she stopped playing. “The Vice President requests that you present yourself in the master bedroom,”</p><p>Hannah sighed as she pulled down the fallboard. She got up and settled the bench beneath where it previously was. “Very well…” and then she realised, <em>she had no idea where that was </em>“…would you mind taking me there?”</p><p>The young maid chuckled “Follow me,”</p><p>◄ ◊ ► ◄ ◊ ► ◉ ◄ ◊ ► ◄ ◊ ►</p><p>She had never walked by that side of the house before. But she still didn’t pay much attention. She just entered the room and the maid left, closing the door behind. Both his bed and his office were settled in it and it made sense that it’d be big enough. His bed laid in the opposite wall, with dark grey silky sheets sprawled neatly on top. A couple of signed papers laid on his desk that stood nearby. He was standing by the fireplace, with a glass of whiskey in his hand.</p><p>He was wearing a white shirt. His tie was loosened around his neck and his sleeves were rolled up his elbows. He turned and looked at her. He took another sip from his whiskey before he walked over his desk and placed it down. He tucked his hands in the pockets of his black pants and he sighed.</p><p>“The Turks made a thorough research on your past and I say with regret that they didn’t find anything. Whoever erased your data, they did a pretty good job,” Rufus said.</p><p>Hannah chuckled, “How come my brother hasn’t already told you everything?” There was no way he hadn’t told them. <em>Traitor. </em></p><p>Rufus shook his head. “He refused to speak. He said you’ll have to tell me yourself,” His eyes met hers and she knew that the silence that followed, was because he was waiting for her to speak. To spill out everything that she had done and she had tried so hard to erase.</p><p>Hannah frowned. She crossed her hands against her chest and looked away from him. “This wasn’t in the deal,”</p><p>“Alas, as per our deal, your protection lies in my hands. I want to know what I’m up against,” Rufus reasoned.</p><p>“If you’re worried about my protection, then you’re wasting your time. I’ve eliminated all that which threatens me,” Hannah said and she looked back at him. He was pressing some of his weight against his desk. His hands were crossed against his chest and he had a cold look on his face as he took a moment to think. He sat straight and let out another sigh.</p><p>“As you wish,”</p><p>She turned around to leave but his voice stopped her.</p><p>“I did not ask you to leave, Hannah,”</p><p><em>Oh- </em>she knew what that meant. She was in for a long night, wasn’t she? She had grabbed the doorknob to open the door and walk out, but she found she could no longer do that. She pushed her hand away and she turned to find him sitting by his chair in front of his desk. His elbows pressed against the wooden surface of the table whilst he brought his hands together, beneath his nose. The only sources of light in the room, were the fireplace and the lamp on his desk, and -of course- the lamps settled on the bedtables on each side of his bed.</p><p>“Come here,” She complied, approaching him. He pushed away from the desk, giving her enough space to stand in front of him while he sat on his chair. “Kneel,”</p><p>A shiver ran down her back as she knelt down and looked up at him. His thighs were spread around her. His groin was at just the right height. He looked down at her with a pleased smirk and he leaned in, resting his elbows on top of his knees. His hand reached for her chin, lifting her head up to look at him.</p><p>“Your compliance impresses me, Ms. Sinclair. Perhaps there’s something about your past that taught you how to obey,” He shot her a knowing look, letting her know that he had probably figured out much about her.</p><p>“There’s a great many things that my past has taught me… sir,” She tried her best not to slap him across the face. He shouldn’t be meddling with stuff she clearly did not want to discuss.</p><p>His hand found her face and he led her up to him till his lips found her cheek. He pressed kisses all the way to her own lips. He kissed her soft and slow, without invading her mouth like he had done the last time as if he was apologising for his curiosity. She felt her eyes closing as she just lingered on the kiss.</p><p>His taste and his scent reached her senses and she sighed. All thoughts of <em>murdering him </em>were gone and she wanted nothing but to do what he ordered. She had never felt this for a man before, and she honestly hated it. She hated being vulnerable. She hated being <em>used </em>but this time there was something about it that it didn’t make her hate it <em>that much</em>.</p><p>He broke the kiss as his hand reached for his belt, unbuckling it, and he unzipped his pants. She watched him, with an eagerness that she never knew she’d have for such a thing. But his eyes never let go of hers as he pulled his hardness out in his hand. Half hard, he brought his cock to her lips and she found herself biting her tongue.</p><p>“Suck,” He commanded and she complied right away. </p><p>Her lips closed around the tip, drawing gently on the sensitive hardening flesh. She listened to his breathing, as it tensed and she felt nothing but a smirk creeping across her lips. <em>Oh- </em>the things she could do to him with just her mouth.</p><p>His hand found her hair, pushing back the messy, blonde locks while she worked on the tip before she pushed him all the way in. He let out a low groan as she took his whole length in and pulled back out, soaking him in her saliva, and running her tongue over his tip, driving him mad. </p><p>The wet heat of her mouth, as she pulled him back in, was absolute bliss, and she tried to pull him out, but he stopped her. His fingers fisted in her hair keeping her in place as he let out another groan. </p><p>With a swift move, he was on his feet and her back was crushing against the wooden leg of the desk. He thrust his cock deep in her mouth till she was choking and tears were forming in her eyes. Her hands found his thighs for support as he grabbed her head and started fucking her mouth till the tip of his cock was hitting down her throat, and dribbles of saliva were rolling down her lips. </p><p>He pulled out of her mouth with a rough jerk and she was left there panting, sitting on the floor with her back against the leg of the table, and a drool of saliva clinging on her shirt. </p><p>“On the bed, now,” he ordered between his heavy breathing and she got up right away. </p><p>She sat on the edge of the bed and she watched him as he approached her. He had that hunger in his eyes. His cock was hard, glistening with her saliva. His hand found her neck, he didn’t squeeze, but he let her know that he could squeeze. </p><p>He pushed her down. Her back crashed against the bed and he parted her legs with his knee. He leaned on top of her catching her gaze once again. “Undress,” </p><p>She took off her shirt and set off to take off her pants. Her knickers were so soaked, it was ridiculous. A blush crept on her cheeks as she was left in her undergarments and she felt the tip of his cock pressing hard against her thigh. She took off her bra first, revealing her breasts. By now, his hands were resting on each side of her head. Half her body hung from the bed and the only thing that kept her from falling was his own body that was settled between her legs. </p><p>He pulled off his tie with a swift move and he caught her wrists, tying them above her head with a tight knot that’d leave her bruised. But she didn’t care. His hands reached for her knickers, tearing off the last piece of clothing that she wore. Now she was naked. The cold breeze that came from the window brushed against her bare skin and she shivered, but it wasn’t cause of the cold. It was his gaze that lingered on her skin. His fingers still dug in her tied wrists, making sure she’d keep them on top of her head. He pulled off his shirt, tossing it away, and he did the same with his pants, kicking them away before his naked body hovered on top of hers. Warm muscles, glistening in sweat, they tightened as he leaned back down on top of her.</p><p>His mouth found her breasts, starting by licking, kissing, nipping. His tongue lashed out against her nipple and she let out a gasp. Wet heat enclosed around her skin and she let her head roll back, but before she had the chance to breathe, he thrust into her.</p><p>She let out a cry, caught off guard. Her legs trembled as he pushed all the way in, filling her to the hilt with a hard groan against her neck. His hands were everywhere. Her hips, her thighs, her neck, her head, but mainly trying to keep himself from crushing her. </p><p>He pulled out and thrust back in with force, stretching her tight walls once more, and knocking another cry out of her. He leaned in and caught her lips between his. He nipped and bit hard on her sensitive swollen skin. His hardness stilled deep inside of her giving both a moment to adjust before he started thrusting. </p><p>He propped her legs on top of his shoulders, allowing himself to move deeper as he pulled out and back in. She would’ve cried out again if he wasn’t forcing his tongue down her throat. A hand found her tied wrists, pinning them against the mattress, making sure she’d keep them on top of her head while his other hand found her throat. His fingers clenched slightly around her airway just enough to let her know that he could choke her should he so wish. </p><p>He pulled away from the kiss only to bring their foreheads together. He pulled out and thrust back in once more. Her eyes shut, her head rolled back, her lips parted as another shout reached her throat, but his fingers tightened around her throat, forcing her to look back up at him.</p><p>“Look at me when I fuck you,” he ordered. His voice low, harsh and commanding and she found she wanted nothing but to do just that. Her half-lidded eyes met his and his hand let go of her neck and found her cheek. His thumb brushed warm across her lower lip. A strand of hair fell on his forehead and her hands twitched. She needed to touch him but, <em>damn him</em>, his fingers were tight around her wrists, pinning them on the bed above her head. </p><p>“Y- Yes, sir,” she stuttered breathlessly and a smirk flashed across his lips as he leaned in and kissed her again, but he did not give her enough time to kiss him back and she whined in frustration when he did it again. </p><p>He bit on her lip as he started thrusting. She let out a gasp and her head rolled back but tried her best to keep their eyes locked. The intensity flickered in his pale blue eyes as his warm breaths brushed against her lips and his hips took her. Each thrust going deeper whilst he dug bruises on her thighs trying to keep her steady. </p><p>He picked up the pace and she gasped once again. Her lips parted in a soundless cry when his hips started crushing against hers in a rapid rhythm, each time stretching her tight walls, filling her insides until he found that spot. Her screams resounded in the room and his mouth found her neck, biting harshly like a wild animal, giving her new marks to remember him by. Marks that would let everybody know that she was his. </p><p>She <em>was </em>his. He <em>owned </em>her. He let go of her wrists -satisfied that she was going to keep her hands there- and his hands reached for the mattress, propping himself so that he could thrust deeper. </p><p>He knew she was close. Her eyes shut though, defying his order and he stopped thrusting right before she had the chance to come. The sweet release was so close but, <em>damn him, </em>for stopping so cruelly right before she reached her edge. She let out a whine of protest. Her nerves burned. Her body was on fire. Her muscles clenched tightly around his hard cock that was deep but not <em>fucking </em>moving. </p><p>“Fuck,” she swore frustratingly and he let out a pleased chuckle. He was enjoying torturing her, <em>wasn’t he?</em> </p><p>“What was that?” </p><p>“Let me fucking come!” She growled behind gritted teeth, slamming her hands across his chest.</p><p>He leaned in. His tongue snuck out, dragging a hot, wet line from her cheekbone to her earlobe. “You’ll come when I say so,” </p><p>She groaned and he let out another amused chuckle as he pulled out of her and released her legs from around his shoulders. </p><p>Before she even knew it, his hands were around her waist, flipping her face down on the mattress with her feet hanging from the edge of the bed. She felt his hand pressing against the small of her back as he thrust back in. She cried out. Her hands fisted around a handful of sheets.</p><p>He didn’t let her breathe. He took her so hard, so fast that she just about screamed. Her eyes shut tight as his hand reached for her hair and pulled harshly on the blonde locks, pulling her head back up. His hips pounded hard against hers as he hit that spot again and again and she came. She came hard with another shout, and a gush of liquids coating his hardness as he fucked her through her orgasm. </p><p>He pulled out of her with a jerk, and he stroked himself till he came on her rear with another low growl. She felt the hot, sticky liquid on her skin and she sighed against the bedsheets. His hand reached for hers, untying his tie from around her wrists. His hands slipped beneath her and he helped her lie on her back and settle further onto the bed.</p><p>He didn’t say a word. He just grabbed the sheets and covered her body as she let her head rest back against the pillows. But she was confused. Was he actually going to let her sleep there? <em>With him? No. </em>This didn’t sound right. He couldn’t be letting her so… so <em>easily? </em></p><p>“Are you sure you want me to sleep with you?” She asked as she watched him pull out a fresh set of clothes from his closet.</p><p>She couldn’t help her gaze that rested on the shifting muscles of his back, complimented beautifully by the dim lights of the lamps and the fireplace. But she had a reason she was asking that. She didn’t want to wake him from her nightmares, but <em>how in the world was she supposed to explain that?</em> He wasn’t supposed to know much about her. <em>Heck, </em>he wasn’t supposed let her sleep with him in the first place.</p><p>“You’ve been -I admit- impressively obedient. You may rest with me as you please,” Rufus said before he made his way to his bathroom and vanished in the other room with no further words.</p><p><em>Well, </em>if she was to sleep with him, then she at least didn’t want to be naked. Once he was out of sight, she picked back up her clothes from where they’d been tossed, and she pulled them back on before she slipped back beneath the bedsheets.</p><p>Once again, <em>Rufus Shinra </em>was <em>unreal</em>.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. would you, please, stop being so fucking nice?</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> <strong> ONCE UPON A TIME, </strong> she <em>loved</em> rain. The pavement always shone silver beneath the streams of water that coated it. It had been raining for entire days and nights in the <em>newfound treasure vault</em> called ‘Wall Market’. <em>Yes. </em>It was new back then. A whole new City. The only one independent from Shinra. The only one that offered what Midgar’s upper levels could not. Alas, even Shinra executives visited that place.</p><p>She remembered that the only time it had rained, was just those couple of days. They had no visitors. No lonely wanderers to stop by and have a drink at the ‘Drunkards’ Piano Bar of Wall Market. The rain tapped, and tapped, <em>and tapped </em>against the ceiling and the sound always soothed her. She always loved rain.</p><p>But after that night, she learned to hate it. She hated rain so much afterwards.</p><p><strong>November 30<sup>th</sup>, [</strong><strong>μ</strong><strong>]</strong><strong> – </strong><strong>εγλ</strong> <strong>1989</strong></p><p>
  <em>“And these are the sevenths,” The old man pressed a chord on the piano keys and the fourteen-year-old girl leaned in to see the extra notes that turned the chord into a seventh.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>She raised an eyebrow. “So, you just add the seventh note?”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“Yes, and sometimes, you can even neglect the first,” He instructed before removing his finger from the first and pressing the chord again without the first. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>She frowned. “It doesn’t sound so nice,” </em>
</p><p>
  <em>“That’s because the B needs to move downwards or upwards in order to be solved,” he pressed another chord and it sounded perfect. Perfect harmony. Her eyes widened. She loved this. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>“Let me try! Let me try!” She cried out excitedly and her hands reached for the keyboard right away, repeating the man’s moves. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>He laughed and clasped his hands together. “That was amazing! You learn so fast, my little pianist,” </em>
</p><p>
  <em>She joined his laughter with her own as she tried again a couple of times before she turned at the old man and gave him a bright smile. “Aw, Mr. Hopkins, thank you so much,” she said in utter gratefulness. Their piano lessons were the only thing she looked up to those days. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>He gave her a stern look “Hannah, what did I ask you to call me?”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>She laughed “Mr- Er- Uncle Ben,” She couldn’t help it. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>“That’s better,” He gave her a smile, which faded right away when the harsh voice of a man came from behind. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>It was his son. A tall man in his mid-twenties who had inherited his father’s dark skin and his long-gone mother’s honey-coloured eyes. “So, pops! This is the girl you’re going to pass down the bar, ain’t she?” Both turned toward the young man, who wasn’t alone. A couple of his friends were standing back and Hannah cowered behind Uncle Ben right away but her eyes widened as the realisation hit her.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“What?” she turned at the old man. Was he really going to give her the bar? </em>
</p><p>
  <em>“What if she is? What is your problem?” Uncle Ben spat back “If you’re worthy enough, you’ll build something on your own!” Uncle Ben had always been disappointed in his son who had become a Mako addict. He’d talk to her sometimes about it, but she knew he still loved him. He was his only son after all. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>The man laughed “I’m sorry, pops. I ain’t ready to abandon the family business just yet,” he pulled out a gun and shot his father. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Hannah let out a scream of horror as the blood sprayed on her face and the white piano keys where suddenly covered in red. The loud bang of the gun hit her ears and the old man froze. His body leaned backwards. He would’ve fallen off the piano bench if she hadn’t caught him. Hannah’s hands found their way around the old man, supporting his back on her chest. She was shocked. Her eyes were wide in horror as she tried to understand what had just happened. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>The blood slipped out of the bullet wound and soaked the old man’s white shirt. Tears spilled down her cheeks as she looked down at the old man. No. No… he couldn’t be dying… He was the only one that had helped both her and her brother for the last four years. He had given them shelter. He had given them food. He had taken them away from begging in the streets and instead he had given them jobs and money enough to live with him. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>No one held such kindness in the Wall Market. No one would protect them as much as he did. What was she supposed to do now? How was she supposed to raise her brother? A sob reached her throat. She couldn’t breathe. Another tear slipped down her cheek as she stared down at the old man who was more than a father. He was her friend. Her friend was dying. He gave her a smile. Her hand found his and they both pressed against the bleeding, warm wound on his stomach. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>“It’s alright, little one. You’re strong…” he winced. A drop of blood slipped down his lip “…you’re too strong…” he coughed. He coughed harshly and his son started shouting and cursing and yelling, but she couldn’t hear him. Her ears still buzzed from the gunshot but all she could hear was the old man’s voice. “…you’re my lil’ pianist, after all,” he tried to give her a smile before his eyes slipped away and his smile faded and he stopped breathing. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>No. He couldn’t be dead. He couldn’t have died. First, she lost her father, then their mother became a Mako addict and abandoned them in the streets, and now this. Why does it all have to be so unfair? She sobbed. Her bloody hand found her mouth as she tried to ease her breathing. Her asthma wasn’t going to help now. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “Let me go!” She cried out as arms caught her. She tried to fight against the tight grasp of her captors, but she was outnumbered and powerless. The son leaned close till his breath reached her cheek. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>“Pretty thing. Young too. Corneo would pay good gil for you,” he growled. His hands reached for her pants, pushing them down and she tried her best to stop him, digging her nails on his hand before she was restrained by two more pairs of hands and she realised she could no longer move. “But let’s make sure you’re ready first,” </em>
</p><p>
  <em>That’s it. She knew it. She would never be the same after this. Never.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>The rest that she remembered was trying to fight them off. The bruises that she was left with after they had finished. Her shouts that reached the top of her lungs and left her throat hoarse.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“Please leave me alone!” </em>
</p><p>
  <em>“Please, stop!”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“Somebody!”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“Help!” </em>

</p><p>A shout and movement on the bed. They were enough to make him grab the gun that he always had beneath his pillow and point it directly to whoever made Hannah shout like that. But he found that there was no one. He switched on the lamp that stood on his bedtable and he turned to scan the room once more. There was no one there. Nothing indicated threat.</p><p>Rufus sighed as he ran a hand over his forehead and settled the gun beneath his pillow once more, and that’s when he noticed she wasn’t lying down. She was sitting cross-legged, with her face buried in her hands, weeping against them. Her whole body shook. He had never seen her like this.</p><p>She had shouted for <em>help</em>. Was she having a nightmare? Why was she having a nightmare? <em>What happened?</em> He wasn’t expecting himself to be worried, but he genuinely <em>felt curious. </em>Was it because of worry? <em>Don’t be ridiculous. </em></p><p>He still didn’t like the sight of her. He tried placing a comforting hand on her shoulder, but she jumped away. Her whole body tensed as she cowered away from his touch and she turned and looked at him. “No! Don’t touch me!” her voice trembled. Her eyes full of tears as she fended away. “I’m so sorry, but not now… please… not now,” she begged. Her breathing, uneasy, as if she was struggling to breathe.</p><p>He raised an eyebrow and didn’t touch her like she had asked. She had had a nightmare, hadn’t she? She was struggling to breathe. <em>Why does it sound familiar? </em>Then the realisation struck him. He never could have guessed that she was asthmatic.</p><p>“Hannah, take a deep breath,” He instructed as he crawled to sit across her. His hands reached for her face, to attract her attention but she fended away once more.</p><p>“P- Please, Rufus, stop… just go back to sleep-”</p><p>Both his hands reached for her face and he cut her off. His eyes found hers, making sure she was focused on him. “Breathe,”</p><p>His voice was calm, but determined. He looked like he knew what he was doing. Against her better judgement, she did as he had asked, sucking a deep breath and he nodded.</p><p>“Good, now let it out,” he instructed and she exhaled, then he asked her to do it again, and again till she could finally breathe. The tension started to slowly melt away. His thumbs wiped her tears, before he pulled his hands away.</p><p>Another tear slipped down her cheek and her hands reached for her face again. “I’m so sorry I woke you. I should go back to my room. You won’t be able to sleep with me-” she tried to push the sheets away from her body and stand up and leave, but his hand caught hers and he stopped her. </p><p>“I didn’t know you were asthmatic,” Rufus said.</p><p>She let out a bitter chuckle and she looked away from him. She could have never guessed that he would ever <em>help </em>her like that. For all she knew, Rufus Shinra may have been a <em>gentleman</em> but he was still a cold man when it came to business, and what they had was a business deal and nothing more.</p><p>“It doesn’t mix well with panic attacks, does it?” she chuckled bitterly as she wiped her cheeks once more. The tears hadn’t stopped dropping and he had no idea how to help. For once in his life, Rufus Shinra felt <em>powerless. </em>He wasn’t supposed to <em>want </em>to help. But he did want to make her feel better, <em>alas, </em>her condition reminded him of someone very precious that he had lost. </p><p>He just wanted to know <em>what</em> it was that made her cry like that. The strong woman who had built the entirety of a company on her own, she <em>now</em> looked like nothing more than a frightened child and he needed to know why. But he knew she wouldn’t tell him no matter how many times he’d ask. </p><p>He knew he shouldn’t. He knew he’d regret it and it made no logical sense in his mind. But his hands reached around her and he brought her close. She didn’t pull away nor did she fight against him like he expected her to. She just buried her face in his neck and she let him hold her. She was so cold and trembling as she cried against his shirt. Her whole body writhed. He hated it. </p><p>Rufus guided her back down on the bed, slow and careful. Each move could make her push him away. The two of them lied down and his hands slipped around her. He brought the bedsheets back up, covering both their bodies beneath, and slowly the sobbing and crying died out. He heard a sigh coming from her and he buried his face in her hair closing his eyes. He caressed her back with one hand, the other smoothed her hair away from her face. She was clutching on his shirt and he let her. </p><p>He just knew that whatever made her like this, it <em>angered</em> him.</p><p>It really did. </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. dear self, can you, please, stop being so fucking stupid?</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><strong>SLEEP WAS KIND</strong> to her <em>for once</em>. Alas, she did not remember herself sleeping like <em>that. </em>It was only <em>once </em>that she had woken up from <em>a </em>nightmare that night. Usually, she’d have <em>many </em>nightmares, and she’d wake up <em>many </em>times. But once the morning light penetrated her eyelids, and she opened her eyes allowing it in, she remembered it all. She remembered jumping up with a scream and waking him as well. She remembered him <em>helping </em>her out with breathing as if he knew <em>exactly </em>how to help her.</p><p><em>No. </em>It couldn’t have been. Her mind must’ve been playing tricks on her. <em>Yes. </em>There was no way he had <em>helped </em>her. There was no way he had <em>hugged</em> her afterwards and <em>helped</em> her sleep. But if that hadn’t happened, then she couldn’t explain why she didn’t have nightmares for the rest of the night.</p><p>And then, she realised, her head wasn’t lying on top of the pillow, <em>nay</em>- it was resting on a man’s chest, and that man could be no other than Rufus Shinra. She recognized the light grey t-shirt that he had put on before going to sleep. She listened to his heartbeat pounding rhythmically beneath his chest and she found her arm thrown across his belly. Her eyes widened. Panic struck her right away.</p><p><em>What the hell was she doing? No. </em>This was <em>wrong </em>in so many ways, on so many levels. Sure, they were on intimate terms because of their deal, but <em>this? This?! </em>If it happened again, things would get out of hand. She wasn’t supposed to sleep with him. She should have refused and retreated back to her bed, and sink in her nightmares on her own, because that was how it had been all these years, and she had avoided <em>useless </em>things such as <em>attachments. </em>She wasn’t supposed to be attached to <em>him. Of all people. </em>The son of the man who had <em>fucked </em>her company.</p><p>He was stirring from his sleep, and that’s when she broke away. Panic struck harder this time. She found herself in a sitting position. Her cheeks flushed a bright red and she hated that she couldn’t hide it somehow.</p><p>“I- I- I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to come t- this… this close…” she stuttered way more than she expected she would. <em>Oh Gaia- </em>this was <em>too </em>awkward. She pushed the bedsheets away from her and she tried to stand up “…I should probably leave and go get dressed for breakfast. You probably have somewhere to go, and I wouldn’t want to delay you-”</p><p>“Hannah,” He cut her. He sighed as he ran his hand through his hair and he propped his head above a second pillow. “People greet each other <em>good morning </em>when they wake up,” He said sarcastically and she found herself trying her best not to punch him across the face.</p><p>“Right,” She said, and from the silence that followed, she realised what he wanted her to do. “<em>Good morning</em>, Rufus,”</p><p>“Good morning, Hannah,” He turned his back on her and buried a hand beneath his pillow. “Get back to bed, we got six more hours,”</p><p>She raised an eyebrow. “For what?”</p><p>And that’s when he remembered he had forgotten to tell her “We fly for Costa del Sol in the evening,”</p><p>
  <strong>◄ ◊ ► ◄ ◊ ► ◄ ◊ ► ◄ ◊ ► ◄ ◊ ►</strong>
</p><p>They had arrived the same night. The summer vacations were near and there were already people coming to stay in that place and enjoy the sun’s heat and the numerous resorts that rested by the largest beach in the world.</p><p>Hannah found herself staring around her in amazement. The only reason she had visited Costa del Sol in the past, was to strike deals, and even back then, she wasn’t staying in five-star hotels. This one definitely <em>did </em>look like a five-star hotel, even though, she had never been in one. </p><p>He had booked a suite, so it seemed. Their stuff was taken upstairs and what was more surprising, was that it was just the two of them. No Turks or guards to keep watch. Just her and him, but an extra suitcase filled with guns <em>only</em>. She guessed he <em>did not need</em> bodyguards.</p><p>She didn’t know why they had to come to Costa del Sol, but for <em>now, </em>they settled their clothes in their shared closet and it turned out that they were going to share that suite. Which meant <em>one bed. </em>Which meant she would either sleep in the bathtub on the floor.</p><p>
  <em>There was no way she was letting herself sleep with him again. </em>
</p><p>They were going to stay for seven days. If she remembered correctly, they were already five days into the deal. Ten days were left. <em>What could possibly go wrong in ten days?</em> </p><p>Hannah checked the time, briefly opening her phone. <strong>8:48PM.</strong> She set it back down on the bedtable as she sat on her side on the bed. She watched him settling the last bit of clothing that he’d brought with him in the shelves of the closet.</p><p>“I have a couple of meetings to attend tomorrow morning. You may use that time to work,” Rufus said as he turned and looked at her. He closed the closet and he sat on the bed beside her.</p><p>She nodded. <em>Sounds like a plan. </em>She needed to know if there was any progress with finding alternative sources of energy. She had put her scientists to work. But his hand found her cheek and he drew her whole attention back to him. She met his icy blue eyes. His touch was warm and soft against her skin. She followed his eyes as they found her lips.</p><p>He guided her to lean closer till his breath brushed above her chin. Her eyes found his own lips. Pale-brown, and dry and perfect. He kissed her. His tongue found her lower lip, asking for permission. It was so unlike him to do that. But she let him in like she always did and their tongues touched and his taste reached her senses.</p><p>Her hands found his face, cupping his cheeks, bringing him further down to her. His arms slipped around her, and before she knew it, he was settling her body on his lap with her legs hanging from the side. He deepened the kiss, finding her throat with the tip of his tongue and knocking a gasp out of her. Her hands were in his hair <em>now </em>and he wasn’t pulling her away, nor was he fighting for <em>dominance. </em></p><p>He just kissed her -not too soft- but slow, and she -honestly- never thought that Rufus Shinra would ever be capable of doing that. undeniably last night, he had proved her wrong. He had indeed hugged her. He had indeed helped her snap out of the panic attack that she had gotten in. And <em>damn him, </em>because no one had ever done that to her before. No one, except maybe her brother, but once they got wrapped up in their jobs, the two siblings didn’t see each other often.</p><p>No one had hugged her to sleep. She would usually just hug a pillow and pretend it was her father. The one that had died long before everything went downhill. No one ever really cared to help her <em>like this </em>and she knew it was such a simple act and she shouldn’t be feeling touched by it, but she couldn’t help it.</p><p>When they broke the kiss and he set off to settle her back on the bed, her hands found their way around his shoulders, and stopped him from moving further. “Thank you,” She wasn’t really sure what she was doing, she just knew she <em>needed</em> to say that. Even though it was <em>stupid</em> to say that. This man had blackmailed her into this deal, but still, he wasn’t treating her the way she was <em>used to being treated. </em></p><p>Rufus Shinra wasn’t so bad after all.</p><p>But he didn’t speak for a moment as if he was trying to figure out <em>why</em> she said that. “F- For last night,” she added.</p><p>The corners of his lips slightly curled up into a smile. If she wasn’t that close to him, she would’ve definitely missed it. “If you would tell me what is it that scares you then I could <em>take care</em> of it,”</p><p>She shook her head. “I <em>have </em>taken care of it,” She sighed. “Erasing memories is harder than <em>erasing people</em>,”</p><p>He nodded in understanding. His hands tightened around her once again as he placed her body back on the bed and he stood up. He checked the watch that he had tied around his wrist.</p><p>“Get dressed,” He said. “We’re going to have dinner,”      </p><p>◄ ◊ ► ◄ ◊ ► ◉ ◄ ◊ ► ◄ ◊ ►</p><p>She didn’t really have a fancy dress to put on, except for maybe the one that she wore that night at the ball in the Shinra residence in the midst of Midgar. The night that she had met Rufus Shinra for the first time and had drawn so much attention to her in that dress. It was a blood red, exposing her back, and some of her cleavage. It seemed to have drawn Rufus Shinra’s attention as well back then at that ball.</p><p>So, she put it on once again and she let her hair loose. The messy blonde locks touched her bare shoulders, as she exited the bedroom and found Rufus waiting in the living room of their suite. He too was dressed formally. A black shirt beneath the white-grey jacket, and a dark purple -almost black, tie. </p><p><em>Damn him </em>because he looked <em>perfect</em>. His hair, the same as always, his pale-brown lips quirked up in a sly smile as he slipped his gaze all over her. His hands were tucked in his pockets, as if he had something there.</p><p>“I- I don’t have other fancy dresses to put on so I just-” </p><p>“Hannah,” calling out her name was enough to stop her talking. “You’re beautiful,” He added and he approached her. His eyes met hers once more. He offered his hand and he gave her a smile. She took his hand and she let her fingers sink in his.</p><p>The two exited the suite and walked down the hall in silence, but his hand still held hers and didn’t let go until they reached the elevator. The two of them waited as it took them downstairs. It was going to take a moment, since the building was a couple of stories tall, and the elevator didn’t seem to be needed anywhere else at the moment.</p><p>In a blink of an eye, she found her back crushing against the wall of the elevator, and Rufus’ mouth was on hers. His tongue invaded her mouth knocking a gasp out of her. Her eyes closed. Her head was pushed back against the wall of the elevator, and his hands snuck beneath the slit of her dress whilst he dug his fingers in her exposed thigh. He swirled his tongue against hers with a groan, before he let go of her lips and dragged his way to her ear. Her fingers were clutching on his jacket, till she found his tie, tugging him down to her as he breathed hard against her ear, and for a moment, she had forgotten they were in an elevator.</p><p>“The moment I first saw you in that dress, I wanted to bend you over the bench and <em>break </em>you,” he spoke against her ear. His voice raspy and low. She shivered. She bit on her tongue and tried to calm down her own breathing. <em>Damn it. </em>She could already feel the misty heat gathering between her legs.</p><p>Her mind snapped back to reality when his hand snuck beneath her panties. Was he going to take her <em>now? There?! </em>In the elevator that could open any moment and have people rushing in?</p><p>But, <em>no</em>, he had other plans.</p><p>He slipped something inside of her. Cold metal, in a circular shape. It stretched her walls just right. She bit her lip. She knew exactly what that was. He pushed in the second metal ball, till the first was pressing just right on her sensitive spot. She let out a gasp. Her head rolled back and she breathed hard. <em>How in the world was she supposed to walk now? </em>Every movement was going to be torture.</p><p>“Rufus…” she tried to protest but his other hand found her lips, clamping across her mouth, not letting her speak.</p><p>“You’re not allowed to come until I’m inside you,” He said. His breath brushed on her nose and his hand slipped away from her lips and caught her neck. He wasn’t squeezing, but he made sure that he let her know that he <em>could</em>. <em>Damn him. </em>She repeated those two words a couple of times in her mind as she tried her best to ignore the heat between her legs. “Is that clear?”</p><p>She nodded and he pulled his hand away with pleased grin on his face. He set his jacket straight and tightened his tie. “Good girl,” He ran a hand through his hair, smoothing them back in place. The door opened and he walked out and she was left there, trying her best to ease her breathing. Again, <em>how was she supposed to walk now? </em></p><p>She sucked in a deep breath and tried to -at least- step out of the elevator before it would start moving again. Every single step was <em>impossible. </em>The movement caused her walls to tighten around the small balls that pressed against her sensitive spot. She stood beside him whilst he waited for her in midst of all those people, and he had a pleased, mischievous smile on his face, as if nothing had happened.</p><p>She was either going to <em>murder</em> him or <em>marry </em>him. The prior sounded more possible than the latter.</p><p>He offered his hand for her to tangle hers around, and the two of them walked arm in arm in the dining hall. She tried her best to ignore it, and just <em>walk</em>, pretending everything was normal.</p><p>There were other couples like them, making their way to the dining hall, though most men seemed to be paying more attention to Hannah, than they were paying to their partners. Rufus made sure he returned their looks with a murderous one of his own.</p><p>After being served their food, Rufus and Hannah sat on a table for two, and listened to the soft Jazz Band play, accompanied by the chatter of people. The food was delicious. The people were many, and they were all dressed in formal, expensive dresses that she had never even dreamt of. No matter the fact that she was a CEO of a company, she was working all the time. She never had the chance to live like this.</p><p>She sucked a piece of pasta in her mouth, meeting the creamy, salty sauce of the carbonara that she had chosen for dinner. The chopped bacon in the sauce was mouth-watering. He had chosen a roasted steak with salad on the side, both sharing a bottle of white Moscato wine.</p><p>Once she was finished eating, she tried to cross her legs, but then the metal balls pressed harder against her sensitive walls and she gasped. He gave her a look, and she turned that gasp into a discreet cough. Heat spread on her cheeks and she instantly started scolding herself mentally. She stopped trying to cross her legs since that was no longer an option.</p><p>“You’re not choking again, are you?” Rufus asked, raising an eyebrow and she shot him a glare.</p><p>“Concerned?” She asked playfully.</p><p>He sipped on his wine. “Of course. You’re not dying on my watch,”</p><p>“Then how come you haven’t brought a battalion of bodyguards?”</p><p>His lips quirked up in a smirk. “I don’t need them,”</p><p>She raised an eyebrow incredulously.</p><p>“Look around you, Hannah,” he said. “They’re all company owners of any kind. Do you see any bodyguards?”</p><p>She shook her head. <em>Indeed,</em> there were no bodyguards anywhere, no matter how fancy the attires and no matter how expensive the jewels were around the women’s necks.</p><p>“This is ‘<strong>Phoebe</strong>’ Seaside Resort. The securest hotel on Gaia,” Rufus said.</p><p>She raised an eyebrow as she remembered a full suitcase of guns and bullet packs that he had also packed with them. “You don’t believe that, do you?”</p><p>He chuckled amusingly. She was smart. He admired that. “I don’t,” he admitted as he refilled her glass with wine. The <em>third </em>glass and she wasn’t much accustomed to drinking.</p><p>Was he trying to get her drunk?</p><p>Their dessert was served not long after, and whilst they took their moment to appreciate the delicious chocolate souffle, she found that she wanted to ask <em>one </em>thing. She couldn’t help pondering on what had happened last night. She was still trying to understand <em>why </em>he had helped her. <em>Why? </em>He wasn’t winning anything from helping her. <em>Was he? </em></p><p>He was supposed to be <em>heartless</em>. He was supposed to care about nothing but his business and maybe overthrowing his father, but other than that… he couldn’t be caring for her, <em>could he? </em>She scolded at herself mentally. <em>Don’t be ridiculous. </em>Rufus Shinra was the son of that <em>bastard </em>that was <em>killing</em> the planet slowly day by day. There was no way he didn’t have <em>some</em> of his father in him. But he had helped her snap out of an asthmatic shock that was induced by her nightmare. <em>How did he know how to do that?</em> </p><p>“How did you know how to help me calm down last night?” She asked out of nowhere and even he seemed caught off guard from the sudden, strange question.</p><p>He didn’t answer right away. Instead he dipped his fork into the soft, chocolate cake and he sighed. “My mother was asthmatic. I learned all I could to be able and help her,” it was all the answer that he gave, but it was enough. He let out a bitter chuckle. He hadn’t spoken the word<em> ‘mother’</em> for <em>so, so long</em>.</p><p>“I see,” she fell silent once again. <em>“My mother <strong>was </strong>asthmatic,” </em>he had said, which meant that his mother was <em>no longer around</em>. Maybe she should never bring that subject up again because it certainly was a sensitive one.</p><p>He needed to change the subject. “Tell me, Hannah, if you could choose between burning alive and planting a bullet to your head, what kind of death would you choose?”</p><p>Hannah raised an eyebrow. <em>Was this some kind of a test? </em>“Do I necessarily have to die in this scenario?” she asked, even though, she did have an answer to his odd question.</p><p>Rufus nodded. “Everyone dies eventually. People should at least choose how they want to die,” he sipped his wine.</p><p>Hannah shrugged. “A burning death is considered one of the most painful ways to die. Planting a bullet to one’s head is quick. Painless, I’d say. The brain has no pain sensors, so it doesn’t feel pain,”</p><p>Rufus nodded. It did make perfect sense, and he agreed. He was surprised she knew that. He was surprised he would make the same choice.</p><p>The sound of a woman’s voice, singing, came from the Jazz Band as couples started standing up to dance in the open space in the middle of the large room. The two of them turned and looked at the couples as they danced at the slow rhythm of the jazzy song. She remembered playing that those few nights that she had worked in that jazz bar in Wall Market.</p><p>“Do you dance?” Rufus asked.</p><p>How was she supposed to explain that she knew 37 different dancing styles? Andrea never hired girls who didn’t know how to dance, and if she was to work as a Honey Girl, she had to put lots of practice into it.</p><p>“I do,” She tried her best to keep that smirk from forming on her lips, but she knew she was failing when he chuckled.</p><p>“It’s been a long day. If you too wish to dance, then I suggest it’d be something slow,” Rufus said and she nodded gratefully. She couldn’t move much at her current state. Rufus stood up and offered his hand. “Would you mind honouring me with this dance, Ms. Sinclair?”</p><p>She looked at his hand, and then back up at him. She remembered the first time he had offered her his hand. It was the first night that she had visited the Vice President’s residence in Junon and back then she had neglected his offer to help her stand. But <em>now </em>she didn’t feel like neglecting it. <em>Now </em>she took his hand and returned his smile with one of her own. “Don’t mind if I do,” She stood up and he guided her away from the tables and they finally reached the rest of the couples on the dance floor.</p><p>His arm found its way around her waist, whilst the other caught hers and she let her fingers sink in his. Her other arm found his shoulder and they started moving. The song was slow and -as he had said, there was no need to move a lot. Even though there were lots of people around them, and there were a lot more sounds than just the music, she could hear nothing but her steady breathing and the soft music.</p><p>His eyes caught hers and he found himself sinking in their unique light-green colour. His grip tightened around her back, bringing her body closer to his and she didn’t mind. There was something about the way that he looked at her, that made her want to move closer. His forehead met hers, pressing down to her, making sure he had her full attention.</p><p>She was <em>his</em>. Such a beautiful and unique woman, it was almost unbelievable she was <em>his. </em>She was unlike any other that he had met. Beautiful blonde hair, pale blue eyes. Her lips, a blood-red, slightly parted.</p><p>A vague past that he had yet to unfold but he was sure that it was a story worth the wait. <em>Intelligent too</em>. She wouldn’t be the CEO of a company that had successfully survived Shinra’s clutches if she wasn’t intelligent. There was no room for emotions now. No matter how intoxicating her perfume was and how creamy her skin looked on her chest. There was still no room for anything more than what they had agreed. <em>This is just a deal.</em></p><p>But before he had the chance to remind himself of this once more, she buried her face in his neck and both her hands found their way around his shoulders. She brought him closer and he was left stiff and dumbfounded for a moment.</p><p>
  <em>Why would she want to bring him closer? </em>
</p><p>She was supposed to hate him, <em>wasn’t she? </em></p><p>It didn’t feel like it. Both his hands slipped around her waist and he pressed a kiss against her temple, and for a moment, he just didn’t know <em>why </em>he had done that. His heart beat fast and he was terrified that he was <em>falling. No</em>. He could <em>not</em> allow that. He would be <em>damned </em>if he did. He should probably break the deal and send her back to Midgar by tomorrow morning.</p><p>
  <em>Yes. </em>
</p><p>A -more than a good idea. One that he knew he wasn’t going to do. He had promised he’d help her and Rufus would never break his word. She felt his hand fisting in her hair and pulling her head back so that she looked up at him. Half-lidded, hazy eyes met his. Her lips, slightly parted. His hand reached for her cheek and he pushed a strand of her hair behind her ear.</p><p>“Hannah,”</p><p>“Yes?”</p><p>He kissed his way to her ear where he whispered softly. “Time to retreat for the night,”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0009"><h2>9. can you, please, stop driving me fucking crazy for you?</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><strong>HER BACK CRASHED</strong> on the door of their room as they rushed in. His mouth found hers right away. His hands glided all over her, clutching on her dress. He kissed her with a wild intent. She tasted the wine on his tongue and before she even knew it, she was flipped over. Her hands found the wooden surface of their suite’s door. She pressed her forehead against it as his hands worked skilfully on her dress, and undid the zip.</p><p>Her dress dropped around her ankles and she turned back around to start kissing him again. She wanted his lips on hers. She wanted to feel his heartbeat pounding against hers. She knew she shouldn’t do anything that he didn’t ask her to, but her hands still worked on his tie, loosening it, tossing the piece of clothing in an unseen dark place in their bedroom.</p><p>The wine rushed hot in her veins as he forced his tongue down her throat. She gasped. His hand found her hair, pulling her head back and revealing her neck. He let go of her lips and slipped below. He trapped her skin between his lips and he sucked hard till he was leaving another bruise. His tongue snuck out, licking the red mark, making it sting till she was gasping again. He wasn’t intending to be kind tonight. <em>No. </em></p><p>She was there to please him. As per their contract, he <em>owned </em>her. He was there to remind her of that. He was there to remind <em>himself </em>of that.</p><p>Her fingers were tight around his shirt, trying desperately to take it off and touch his skin beneath. His own hands were digging bruises on her back, her waist, her thighs. His hand slipped beneath her panties and caught the metallic chain, pulling both balls out. Her head rolled back against the door with a gasp. Her legs trembled as she tried to adjust at the sudden absence of the small metallic objects that had been pressing <em>deliciously </em>on her walls that <em>now </em>had nothing to clench onto.</p><p>She heard the sound of metal clacking on the floor and his fingers slipped inside of her. Her eyes squeezed shut as he gently massaged her insides while his mouth suckled on her neck till it was filled with swollen bruises. <em>How could he be so good at this?</em></p><p>She was only wearing her black bra and her panties whilst he was still fully dressed. No matter the alcohol that made her head buzz, and the harsh, slow strokes of his fingers, she was aware enough that it <em>still wasn’t fair</em>. Her hands reached for his shirt, undoing the buttons, revealing more and more of his chest beneath.</p><p>But before she could touch him, his hands withdrew from inside of her and caught both her wrists. He pulled his face back up to look at her. A look of displeasure. <em>How dare she act on her own accord? </em></p><p>“Did I ask you to undress me, Hannah?”</p><p><em>Damn him. </em>“N- No,”</p><p>A smirk spread across his lips as he leaned in and his breath found her lips. “Disobedience is not tolerated,” his voice ice-cold, matching his look.</p><p>He caught her hands and led her towards the bed. He sat at the edge, and urged her to sit on his lap with her back against his chest. One hand was tight around her belly, the other tore her panties away. Her head rolled back on his shoulder and his breath found her ear.</p><p>“You’re gonna come for me three times, Hannah…” his hand slipped up and dipped two of his fingers in her mouth. Her tongue snaked around his fingers, coating them in her saliva “…or else, I’m gonna have to think of different ways to punish you, and they may not be so pleasant,”</p><p>She shivered. <em>Damn him. Three times? Three times?! </em>Was he trying to <em>murder</em> her? Because she sure as hell knew that he wasn’t going to stop on <em>three times </em>and she wouldn’t be able to <em>walk</em> tomorrow morning.</p><p>He removed his fingers from her mouth and she bit her tongue when his fingers found her mound, her clit, and then her hole, pushing in. He slipped in deep easily. Her stretched walls clenched around him needily when his fingers started moving. They moved in and out slow at first, but keeping up the pace as he moved on. Each time reaching deeper, till he found that spot and she gasped. Her head rolled back against his shoulder and her eyes shut.</p><p>His fingers worked into her furiously. A cry erupted from her lips as he added a third finger, stretching her tight aching walls and making her whole body tense up. She felt his bulge stirring beneath her, against her rear and she couldn’t help but think of how good he’d feel inside of her. But she didn’t get to think of much. Her head buzzed as he took her so hard, so fast with his fingers, until he touched that sensitive spot and she screamed.</p><p>She came hard, with a hot gush of liquids coating his fingers as they pumped inside of her. The wet sounds his hand fucking her through her orgasm was the only sound that accompanied her gasps, her moans, her whimpers.</p><p>He didn’t stop there. He didn’t slow down. He kept taking her and his lips found her own, hushing her heavy breathing and suckling hard on her tongue. She tried, but she couldn’t focus on kissing him back. His fingers were still pounding inside of her, hitting that spot again, and again, mercilessly dragging her over another sweet release that was going to pop her legs out of place. </p><p>Her muscles clenched as she broke the kiss to catch her breath. Her chest rose and fell heavily. Her eyes shut as he kept taking her mercilessly even though she whimpered and squirmed against him. She couldn’t believe she was close to coming again, but his thumb found her clit and she tensed up. She gritted her teeth as she came again. Her whole body shook and his fingers stilled inside of her. Her head rolled back as she breathed hard against his ear and his tongue snaked out, dragging a hot wet line over her ear. </p><p>“One more time, Hannah,” he spoke against her ear and her eyes opened and she turned to him in shock. Her hand found his, digging in the bulging veins of the arm that was still inside of her. </p><p>“N- No, I can’t, Rufus, please-” </p><p>He gave her clit a sudden jerk and she gasped, her body tensed. His breath found her ear as he spoke “As per our contract I own you, which means if I wish to <em>break </em>you, then I will,” </p><p>She bit her lip. <em>Damn him. </em>This wasn’t supposed to be turning her on. She wasn’t supposed to be enjoying this <em>that </em>much. </p><p>His fingers started working into her again. He started by one, then two, then three. Then his thumb found her clit and she gasped. Her body tensed once more and he started taking her. Massaging her insides with another fast pace that she knew it was going to leave her writhing and screaming. Her own hand tightened around his, unsure of whether she wanted to stop him or let him <em>finger-fuck </em>her till she lost her senses.</p><p>He found her spot and he tapped against with a few more merciless strokes that brought her hard over the edge. She came with another shout and a gush of liquids running down her thighs and coating his fingers. He pulled out of her and dragged his wet fingers all the way from her belly to her neck. His cock was hard against the tight restraints of his pants.</p><p>He removed his hands from around her, and she found herself crumbling on her weak legs. Her hand reached for his knees, propping herself up. Her tongue flashed across her lips as she watched him unbuckling his belt and unzipping his pants. He pulled his hard erection in his hands. Her eyes met his as she leaned in and drew the tip in her mouth. Her let out a groan and his hands reached for her hair, pulling them away from her face.</p><p>She drew in his whole length, coating the hard flesh with her saliva, before pulling him out. Her tongue lashed out, dragging a wet line all over his length she sucked the tip back in. She pulled him back all the way in the welcoming misty heat of her mouth and his hands kept her there. His fingers fisted on the roots of her hair as he guided her mouth up and down on his length till she was choking and drools of saliva were running down her lips as he hit the back of her throat.</p><p>He grunted as he pulled himself out and his hand found her face leading her back closer to him. His breathing was heavier <em>now. </em>His hair, a short mess. She loved watching him hot and bothered like that. She loved <em>being </em>the reason he’d gotten like that.</p><p>“Get on all fours, now,” He ordered breathlessly. His voice raspy, rough.</p><p>She climbed on the bed, doing as he asked, propping herself on both her arms. But he grabbed her arms, making her crash face down on the mattress. She felt his weight pressing on the bed behind her and he thrust in. She cried out. Her sensitive nerves burned as her walls clenched around his hard cock. His fingers were nothing compared to it. He pulled on her hands forcing her to arch her back as he started thrusting.</p><p>He hit deep. He had no intention of being nice. His hips pounded against hers, stretching her walls and hitting her sensitive spot with every single thrust till she was numbed with the feeling. Her eyes shut as she buried her face further against the bedsheets. Her knees gave in as her whole body landed back down on the mattress, dragging Rufus with her.</p><p>He let out a rough grunt as he hit once again deep and his body pressed against hers. His teeth found her earlobe. He grazed it with his teeth before his tongue lashed out and she gasped when he stilled inside of her. His hand reached below, slipping between her and the mattress and grabbing her neck, urging her to pull her head up.</p><p>“You’re here to please me, Ms. Sinclair,” he reminded her breathlessly against her ear. He needed to both remind her and most importantly <em>himself. This is business</em>. <em>There are no emotions when it comes to business. </em>“Nothing more,” he stated once more. He pulled out and then thrust back in with force knocking another hoarse shout out of her.</p><p>“Yes…” she agrees breathlessly.</p><p>His hand reached for her hair. “Good girl,” He pulled on her hair as he lifted himself back up and began thrusting again. There was nothing but her silent shouts and the wet sound of their bodies crushing against each other. His hand landed on her buttock with a sharp blow that made her blood boil. She gasped. <em>Damn him. </em>She wasn’t supposed to like that either. Yet the sting travelled back to her sensitive nerves between her legs and it did nothing but make her want more.</p><p>He did it again and she found herself pushing back against his thrusts, seeking desperately for her fourth orgasm. It didn’t take long. She came hard with another shout and a few whimpers as he fucked her hard through her orgasm till he reached his own.</p><p>He pulled out of her with a jerk and he stroked himself till he came hard on her rosy buttocks. She let her forehead rest against the bedsheets. Her whole body, sore and <em>burning. </em>She didn’t have the energy to move at the moment.</p><p>She let her eyelids close, and she didn’t open them until the next nightmare.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0010"><h2>10. can you, please, stop being so fucking nice?</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><strong>IT WAS THE 4<sup>TH</sup> OF APRIL</strong> when it all started. She knew she was having another nightmare when she heard the familiar shouts in her head. And then came the <em>bang</em>. It came two times. Reno curled closer to her. The eight-year-old’s little body trembled against hers. His little fingers clutched on her clothes. They were in the backseats of their mother’s car. Mother had walked out to <em>speak with their new owner </em>she had said.</p><p><em>Why would mother want to give us away? </em>She remembered herself asking again, and again but Hannah never got an answer. She knew their father’s death had wrecked their family, especially <em>mom. </em>She would find their mom injecting herself with that greenish, phosphorescent liquid. <em>Mako. Mako addiction. </em>The house was a mess ever since <em>papa died. </em></p><p>
  <em>“Hanney…” Reno’s voice came as he looked up at her with his big, turquoise eyes, that shined bright with tears “…what was that?” he asked with a sob and Hannah’s hands reached for his messy scarlet hair, pushing them out of his face. Her own heart beat hard against her chest. Her own fingers trembled as she smoothed his hair away from his forehead. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>But she forced a smile to her little brother. Both her hands reached for his cheeks, wiping away the tears that had been streaming down his face. “No matter what that was, I <strong>will</strong> protect you, kiddo,”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“You promise?” the little boy asked. His voice trembled. Another tear slipped down his cheek and another sob reached his throat. Hannah nodded, finding it too hard to talk. A lump formed in her throat and every other word would choke her if she’d speak it out. Reno buried his face in her neck once more and her hands tightened around him, nuzzling her nose in his hair.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Then, mother walked in the car. She looked panicked. She turned the key to switch the engine back on and start driving away. But then another shot came. And another. Two more times. Her mother’s blood sprayed on Hannah’s face and both siblings let out screams.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Then the door of their car opened and a man bowed down to see the two siblings. A fat man, with weird hair and a sly smile on his lips. A gun in his hands as he stared at the siblings and he laughed. He wasn’t alone.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“What a wonderful prize, ain’t they?” He laughed. “Lemme introduce myself…” he stood straight “…Don Corneo,” he turned at the other men “…bring them in,” </em>
</p><p>Her eyes snapped open and she drew in a deep breath as if she had stopped breathing for the last few minutes. Her eyes released another fresh set of hot tears that were trapped in and a sob reached her throat. She had her back turned to him and she hoped he was sleeping. She didn’t know what time it was. She just knew it was late.</p><p>Darkness fell in their room as she buried her face further into her pillow and sobbed against it. Her body curled in a ball till her knees found her chest. Corneo was the man who had killed their mother. She had vowed that day. She had vowed to herself she was going to kill him with her own hands. Alas, she had failed. Corneo was the <em>only</em> one that she had failed to kill.</p><p>She hated this. She hated <em>sleep. </em>She hated herself for what she had done. It was all so easy to erase from the papers, but so difficult to <em>forget. </em>She would give everything if she could just <em>forget</em>. She would give it all if it meant she could erase all memories from those few years.</p><p>She felt a hand passing around her. A warm palm pressed against her belly and urged her to turn around. She shook her head negatively. She knew it was Rufus giving her <em>another </em>reason <em>not to hate him.</em> She turned supinely only to find him propping himself on his elbow to stare down at her in genuine worry. No one had looked at her that way, except maybe her brother. His hair was a lovely mess. His hand found her cheek and his thumb wiped her tears. No matter how much worried he looked, he didn’t say anything.</p><p>Her hand reached for his own, slowly pushing it away from her cheek. “I’m so sorry I woke you again. I should go sleep elsewhere. You won’t be able to sleep with me, Rufus-”</p><p>“You’re not going anywhere, Hannah…” His thumb wiped another tear as he stared down at her in the dark. The only light, the one coming from the window. “…and neither am I,”</p><p>He had no idea what he was doing. He had no idea <em>why </em>he was saying this. He knew he should have booked two rooms or do <em>anything. Anything but this. </em>But he leaned and pressed a kiss on her forehead and he heard her sigh and close her eyes, and her frightened panting stopped. He was glad it had. He was so glad he was making her feel better and he hated himself for that.</p><p>But what he hated the most was what he did next. His hands reached around her and picked her up, resting her body wholly on top of his. She buried her face in his neck, and breathed him in and she knew that such an act should console her, but more tears formed in her eyes, and another sob reached her throat. She couldn’t believe that there was nothing about this man that she hated.</p><p>She felt his heartbeat beneath her chest, it was fast, matching her own. <em>Could she be falling?</em> <em>Sure, </em>there were emotions <em>here</em> while there shouldn’t be, because -whatever those emotions were- none of them was <em>hatred</em>. <em>No. </em>Her heart beat fast for that man because he was holding her. How dare he hold her like no one else had before? How dare he treat her like this? How dare he be so <em>nice </em>whilst he <em>shouldn’t</em> be?</p><p>He should be <em>mean</em>. He should be a <em>terrible man</em> that cared about nothing but his money, his company and himself but, <em>no, </em>he just didn’t <em>feel </em>like one. He didn’t act like one. Was she really ready to trust this man? <em>Why in the world</em> was he holding her like that? She had never known such kindness to come from someone. She had never been treated like this.</p><p>She just sobbed once more against his neck, and she knew her tears were wetting his shirt but he didn’t seem to mind. His hands only tightened around her, providing the comfort that she had never known. She had never felt safer. All these felt so <em>foreign</em> and so good, it was unbelievable. He could be playing tricks on her. He could be fooling her. It wouldn’t be the first time that she would get fooled. It wouldn’t be the first time she’d get hurt.</p><p>“How can you… be so nice?” She choked out between sobs and his hand found her hair, smoothing them aside.</p><p>He knew these were words that <em>Hannah Sinclair would never speak out to him </em>ever again. Or, <em>actually</em>, she would never speak these out to <em>anyone.</em> <em>How can you be so nice? </em>What did she expect him to do? Let her cry herself to sleep? What kind of man did she think he was?</p><p>All of Shinra’s enemies hated Shinra because of the way his father governed things. And maybe, that bad reputation of his father’s was one that was going to haunt him until he did something about it. But all these nightmares and all those words that she would mumble in her sleep, it all made him wonder, <em>what things had this poor woman gone through?</em> He couldn’t say and he couldn’t ask because it made sense that he shouldn’t bring up something that made her <em>like this</em>.</p><p><em>No. </em>He shouldn’t even care. Why did he care to know what it was that made her a wreck? Why was he even holding her? Why did he even <em>bother </em>to make her feel better? It all made absolutely no sense. She was nothing to him but a business partner and no matter how much he tried to convince himself that she was nothing more, he always found himself in a dead-end, because deep down he knew, he was getting attached to this woman and he <em>hated </em>it.</p><p>His lips found her temple and he pressed a soft kiss against it. He wasn’t going to answer her question, because he -<em>honestly</em>- had no idea what to say. He didn’t know why he was doing this, but he knew he <em>wanted </em>to do it. He wanted to hold her and soothe her and make sure she felt safe. He could not handle the sight of her crying. He really couldn’t. And he hated himself for that.         </p><p>“Sleep, Hannah,”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0011"><h2>11. can you, please, stop being such a fucking asshole?</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><strong>HER GLASSES STOOD</strong> neatly on top of her nose as she stared at the screen of her computer and listened carefully to what her assistants had to say. Her scientists had indeed come up with an idea. They called it <em>tidal power. </em>They were using the wind to create electric energy. And it was <em>brilliant</em>. In fact, it was so brilliant that she had immediately asked for the cost of gil it would require to fund this programme.</p><p>And then came the number that she knew she could <em>never</em> afford. Two <em>billion </em>gil. She could not afford that and her economical manager let her know right away. Her <em>entire</em> company didn’t cost that much. She knew <em>now</em> that she couldn’t rely on anything else but her and Rufus’s deal. There was no other way. Their deposits of coal were ending more and more every single day. It was only a matter of time <em>now</em> before her company would crash.</p><p>“I don’t see any other way out, boss, I’m sorry,” The sound of her assistant’s voice came from her laptop, drawing Hannah’s attention back on the screen.</p><p>Hannah shook her head. “I’m not giving up so easily, Patricia, you know that,”</p><p>“What are you going to do?”</p><p>Hannah sighed heavily. She wasn’t really sure if she should tell her or just keep her current state a secret. <em>Well, </em>she didn’t really have anything else to lose. “I’m making a deal with Shinra’s Vice President that might as well save this company. He’s not on best terms with the President. Everybody knows that,”</p><p>“Are you sure you can trust a Shinra? He’s a businessman, boss. You know better than anybody that men like him care about nothing but themselves and their companies. What if he’s fooling you? What if it doesn’t work?”</p><p>Hannah was expecting to hear this. Her assistant was right. What if he was fooling her? <em>Sure, </em>he couldn’t be trusted. <em>Not yet, at least. </em>And then she scolded at herself for making that thought. Was she really considering trusting this man? <em>How dare she make such a naïve thought? </em>She was no longer that fourteen-year-old helpless little girl that she once was. She had been through a lot and if he was fooling her, she wouldn’t be surprised. He was being <em>far too good </em>to her to be <em>real. </em></p><p>Hannah let out a heavy sigh and she looked back at the screen of her laptop. “Then you should prepare yourself and the other employees for getting fired,” The words tasted bitter on her tongue. She was regretting every bit of that sentence. A sentence that she thought she would ever speak out.</p><p>She was <em>beaten. </em>Once again, <em>she was beaten. </em></p><p>Patricia nodded “I will,” Her tone, serious, accompanied by a sigh before they finished the call, and thus, another day of work had gone by. She just had paperwork to take care of but she didn’t feel like doing it at the moment.</p><p>◄ ◊ ► ◄ ◊ ► ◉ ◄ ◊ ► ◄ ◊ ►</p><p>She didn’t really have anything else to do for the day, and she knew Rufus wouldn’t be back from his business meetings until afternoon. It was such a shame. It would go to waste to be there, in such good weather and by such a wonderful beach, without getting a swim to have a taste of the renowned Costa del Sol waters.</p><p>She knew that Rufus would definitely object, but <em>fuck him, am I right? </em>She just needed to take a swim and he never really clarified whether she could leave their room. She grabbed the bikini that she had brought with her and she put it on. She wore a light blue gown on top and grabbed her hat and sunglasses. The beach wasn’t far and many people had caught a few of the deckchairs that spread across the beach.</p><p>She settled on one. The sea was at ease, and most of the hotel’s clients and staff were at the hotel’s main pool. Thus, the beach was nearly empty and -honestly- she preferred it that way. She took off her gown and her hat and she dived in. The water was cold at first, but it didn’t take long till her body got accustomed to the temperature.</p><p>The sun was warm and it kissed her skin as she dived in and swam till she reached a few meters away from the shore. When Rufus had told her they would be staying in Costa del Sol for so many days, she instantly knew she’d need that <em>one </em>bikini that she had <em>once</em> bought. It was simple in design and black in colour. When she bought it, she knew she would rarely ever use it, and <em>right now </em>it was a chance that she didn’t want to miss.</p><p>“What is a beautiful lady like you doing out here alone?”</p><p>She heard a voice coming from behind and she instantly knew she would either have to drown the man in the water or just turn and give him a smile for his <em>kind words. </em>She tried with the latter. She gave him a kind smile but didn’t get to say something as he offered his hand for a handshake.</p><p>“Jonathan Pine. I’m ‘Phoebe’ Resort’s Night Manager,”</p><p>She couldn’t deny those greenish-blue eyes, the soaked pitch-black hair, and that bright smile on his face. <em>Well, </em>it would be a pity to drown such a <em>delicious </em>man, <em>wouldn’t it?</em> She shook his hand and gave him a smile. It was the kind of smile that she put on when she tried to seduce her clients <em>back in the day. </em></p><p>“Hannah Sinclair,” She said and his eyes widened in surprise.</p><p>“Wait, you mean <em>the </em>Hannah Sinclair?” He asked and she laughed. <em>Don’t flatter me like that, darling. </em>“The owner of Excel Corp?”</p><p>“Honestly, that’s not the reaction I expected,” She chuckled as she ran a hand through her wet, dark blonde hair.</p><p>“Then what kind of reaction did you expect? My mother’s house runs on Excel Corp’s energy,”</p><p>She tried to force an awkward chuckle -knowing very well that her company was either going to go downhill or that she’d keep providing energy to <em>all these households </em>that relied on her.</p><p>“You know what? How about I buy you a drink? I know the bartender. He makes the <em>finest</em> pina colada in Costa del Sol,”</p><p><em>Oh- </em>if Rufus would see her, he would probably <em>skin her alive </em>or punish her in some <em>deliciously torturous </em>way. Either way, it was a tempting deal, and -<em>let’s not forget</em>- she was in no way <em>bound</em> to Rufus. What they had was just a deal, after all, <em>right?</em> But maybe what he’d done those few nights, <em>holding her </em>to sleep… such moves had indeed <em>touched her. </em>But she knew it didn’t mean anything. <em>Rufus Shinra would never fall for a helpless, beaten, little girl like me</em>.</p><p>“Why not!” </p><p>◄ ◊ ► ◄ ◊ ► ◉ ◄ ◊ ► ◄ ◊ ►</p><p>“President Shinra ordered an amount of thirty-six million tons of iron for the construction of weapons that should significantly enhance the SOLDIER program’s weaponry,”</p><p>Rufus fought the need to roll his eyes as he heard the number. <em>Always exaggerating</em>. Thirty-six million tons of iron were <em>more </em>than enough for the construction of weapons such as swords, and all kinds of guns and shields. Yet again, the money was flowing, and <em>as always, dear father </em>never thought of <em>what </em>would happen should the company be brought into a tight spot. He was doing nothing but senselessly wasting gil whilst he should be saving.</p><p>But Rufus had no word in this. He was only there to sign the papers in his father’s place. They were on the balcony of a suite. The man sitting across him, was an owner of an Iron Refinery. The biggest on Gaia, established in the Eastern Continent.</p><p>He just had to watch all that gil go to waste as he signed the papers and handed them back to the middle-aged man. He offered a hand and Rufus shook it. “It was nice doing business with you, Mr. Vice President,” The old man said and Rufus nodded.</p><p>“Likewise,” Rufus said as he pulled his hand away and looked at the watch that he had around his wrist. He still had a couple of minutes before the next meeting that was located outside of the hotel. He gathered a suitcase filled with paperwork that he’d have to finish by tomorrow and he got up from his chair.</p><p>“Before you leave, have a look at the view. It ain’t every day you get to see half Costa del Sol like this, huh?” The old man said as he too got up from his chair and walked towards the marble white banister of the balcony.</p><p>Rufus pursed his lips and held back a sigh of exasperation as he followed the old man, resting a hand on the white marble banister as he stared down at the rest of the hotel and half of Costa del Sol that spread on the right side. He never really cared about balconies with nice views. He had grown up beside the best view in Midgar. Things like this didn’t really excite him.</p><p>But then something caught his attention and for a moment he wasn’t sure if his eyes were either playing tricks on him or… <em>what is she doing there?! </em>He’d never seen such a smile on her face before. Laughing and talking with <em>another man at the beach bar? </em>He did not remember giving her any permission to do that. He knew it made no sense to get <em>that </em>angry, but <em>damn her, </em>he was <em>furious</em>.</p><p>He needed to have a few words with her.  </p><p>◄ ◊ ► ◄ ◊ ► ◉ ◄ ◊ ► ◄ ◊ ►</p><p>She was on her way back from the beach bar to the reception where she’d take the elevator back upstairs to their suite. The pina colada was indeed <em>delicious </em>and so were the looks of that Night Manager, but <em>alas, </em>she had to <em>force</em> a laugh out for his crappy jokes, and, <em>honestly</em>, he didn’t look like a bright one. Nevertheless, he was one of her clients, and she always treated people that gave her <em>money</em> well<em>. </em></p><p>But then somebody grabbed her hand and dragged her away from the crowd of the people that had gathered in the reception. She was about <em>to kick the man’s ass</em>, but then she realised, it wasn’t just <em>any </em>man.   </p><p>“Did I say you could go for a swim?!”</p><p>It came with a growl and it was the only thing that Rufus said, and -quite frankly- it didn’t explain why he had her trapped against a bench in a tight-spaced ‘staff-only’ storeroom, right beside the reception of the hotel. For all she knew, she was on her way back to their suite. The storeroom was small, devoid of people but the two of them and whatever objects that the staff stored in it. She was only aware of her body, trapped between his and the counter, whose wooden edge dug in her hips, and his icy-blue eyes looked down at her <em>furiously. </em></p><p>Was that the punishment that she expected after flirting with another man? <em>Probably, yes. </em>A wonderful punishment it was going to be <em>indeed. </em></p><p>“No,”</p><p>“Did I say you could leave the suite?”</p><p>“No,”</p><p>“Did I say you could talk to another man?”</p><p>“No,”</p><p>She raised an eyebrow reminding herself that it was no time to get angry with this man. He was still her only hope of saving her company. But <em>was he jealous? </em>Could <em>Rufus Shinra </em>even get jealous? It sounded <em>unbelievable </em>and <em>unachievable </em>the more she tried to think about it. <em>Alas</em>, she couldn’t get mad at him <em>now. </em>She still depended on him. But her lips parted, and against her better judgement, she spoke.</p><p>“I didn’t realise I needed permission to do any of that,”</p><p>Her hands found his chest, pressing slightly. A useless effort to push him away. But he caught her wrists and trapped both her hands behind her back. She did try to resist, but he was stronger than her. There was no use.</p><p>He leaned in. His eyes caught hers and his warm breath found her nose. “As per our deal, I <em>own </em>you, Hannah Sinclair, which means, you do not talk when addressed unless I allow it. You do not walk out of our room unless I’m escorting you. I cannot protect you here as much as I could back home, am I clear?” he growled.</p><p>Anger glowed in his eyes and his heavy breathing feathered against her lips. His fingers ever so slightly tightened their hold around both her wrists and for a moment, she wasn’t sure whether she should be afraid or <em>amused. </em>Maybe a touch of both.</p><p><em>Bullshit. </em>He did not care about her safety. He was jealous, but she still wasn’t sure if it was even possible for <em>Rufus Shinra </em>to even <em>get </em>jealous. She frowned. Whatever the reason was, she didn’t care. She wasn’t some <em>animal </em>to be caged in, allowed to walk out only when its master said so. Anger boiled beneath her chest, but saving her company was the only thing that kept her back.</p><p>She chewed on her lip. “Yes, <em>sir</em>,”</p><p>He breathed against her lips and he stared at her for a short moment. His hand let go of hers and found its way around her waist. He grabbed hold of her body, pressing her against his. His other hand found her neck. He did not squeeze, but he let her know that he could if he wished to. He merely guided her face closer and he caught her lips with his own.</p><p>He kissed her furiously. The anger was clear in the way that he bit on her lip. A gasp was knocked out of her. His fingers around her neck slightly squeezed as he lapped his tongue against hers and forced his own down her throat. His other hand tightened around her waist. His knee parted her legs slightly. Her hands reached up for his face, his shoulders, his hair. He didn’t stop her like she expected him to. He didn’t force her hands away. He allowed her to touch him. Her thin fingers soothed him as they tangled messily into the silky blonde locks of his hair.</p><p>All anger just seemed to melt away. His hands were beneath her dress <em>now</em>, tracing her waist, her rear, her thighs. He wanted to touch her. He tasted the salt on her lips as he pulled from the kiss and gathered the salt from the skin of her chin, her cheek, her neck. He reached her ear. Her hands clutched on his shirt around his shoulders as his breath brushed on her earlobe and his fingers dug in her hips. He was holding her so tight, making sure he let her know that she couldn’t go anywhere without his <em>permission</em>. Making sure he let her know that she could do nothing but <em>obey </em>him, and for a moment she actually believed that.</p><p>For a moment, she actually felt like she wanted nothing but to <em>please </em>him, but, <em>alas</em>, she was in a haze. His taste was still on her tongue. Intoxicating and mesmerising. She knew she wasn’t thinking clearly. But his tongue snuck out, giving her earlobe a hot lick, before slightly grazing it with his teeth.</p><p>“You’re <em>mine</em>, Hannah,” he growled against her ear and she shivered. His hand found her hair. His fingers fisted in them as he pulled sharply her head back, and he too pushed back to look at her. The need in his eyes made her bite her tongue. “For a few days more, you’re all <em>mine</em>. If you don’t want this, walk out <em>now</em>,”</p><p>Was he really giving her a choice? For all she knew, that wasn’t supposed to happen. She wasn’t supposed to look up at him and know <em>instantly </em>that she <em>wanted </em>to <em>stay</em>. She wanted to stay for the rest days of their deal -if not more. She did not want to go back to Midgar and start the daily routine. She didn’t mind her routine, but what she did mind was that she couldn’t sleep without jumping up in the nights with the sound of her own screams. Those memories. Her <em>mind. </em>It was the only thing that she was afraid of.</p><p>But there he was, -the son of the most <em>inhuman </em>man that she hated with all her might- there he was, treating her more humanly than any other man she had encountered. Was he not worth her stay? The only reason that slightly made her <em>want </em>to walk out, was that she was afraid she was <em>falling. </em></p><p>She was falling, and she was falling <em>hard</em>, and she knew that if she <em>did </em>fall for the man who stared at her so <em>intensely </em>right now -as if he was afraid that she was going to leave- she knew there was no way out.</p><p>She had never fallen in love. She was always too busy and too <em>broken </em>to do that. She never had the time, nor the energy for <em>love, </em>but <em>this? </em>This was different. <em>He </em>was different. He was so different than the rest of the <em>men </em>that had <em>used </em>her. That uniqueness of his… it <em>terrified </em>her. Why couldn’t he be like the rest? Things would have been less complicated if he was.</p><p>She shook her head “I <em>don’t want</em> to walk out,” she meant every word of that sentence even though her mind <em>screamed </em>at her that she was <em>wrong. </em>She was wrong, she should shut her mouth and <em>run. </em>She should <em>run</em> because she was <em>falling, </em>and that was going to be a -more than a plain- problem</p><p>“Then what do you want, Hannah?”</p><p>That was a question that she didn’t want to answer. Maybe she was afraid that she knew the answer. <em>No. </em>She should stick up to the original plan. Her company. <em>Yes.</em> She wanted to save her company and this man was her only choice. She wanted nothing more. <em>Nothing more. </em>But she bit her tongue. It wasn’t exactly what she was going to say.</p><p>“You,”</p><p>She didn’t know how fast it happened, but she knew that she had spoken that out and she instantly regretted it. But the smirk spread wide on his lips. He did not seem displeased even though he knew that he should be. It was <em>wrong </em>to have her <em>falling</em> for <em>him</em> <em>now. </em>It was wrong to have himself <em>falling </em>for <em>her</em> <em>now</em>. Their contract would come to an end in a few days. He didn’t know how much they could handle.</p><p><em>No. </em>He needed to get out of here. He needed to send her away back to Midgar and break that <em>damned</em> deal. But he still knew he wasn’t going to do that. His hand reached up for her cheek. His thumb found her skin, caressing slightly. He’d never touched her that tenderly before. But he gave no answer. He pulled his hand away and he exited the storeroom.</p><p>Hannah she was left there, taking a moment to think. Had she really just said that? She let out a breath she hadn’t noticed she had been holding. She couldn’t tell what he was thinking. She couldn’t tell what <em>she </em>was thinking. How <em>dare </em>she say that?</p><p><em>Him? </em>Was that really what she wanted? She scoffed and scolded at herself mentally. <em>Stupid, stupid girl. </em>That’s what she must’ve looked like to him. She didn’t know this <em>feeling. </em>It all felt so foreign to her. He was <em>too </em>kind. <em>Too different. </em>He shouldn’t be. Things would have been less complicated if he wasn’t.   </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0012"><h2>12. can you, please, stop asking me about my fucking past?</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><strong>THE MORNING LIGHT</strong> penetrated her eyelids, entering from the window. She knew she was alone when she opened her eyes and glanced over to the blank space beside her on the bed. <em>Of course, </em>he was missing. Of course, he had work to do and <em>so did she</em>.</p>
<p>She got up, had breakfast and returned back to their suite to open her laptop and start working. There was lots of paperwork to be taken care of and she could only hope to be done sometime soon. <em>Oh, who am I kidding? </em>She knew exactly why she was diving into her work so deep and so fast. She needed to keep her thoughts at bay and <em>working </em>always helped with that.</p>
<p>They hadn’t talked about <em>yesterday. </em>He had returned late at night. They had dinner in their room and went straight to bed. He was tired and she didn’t bother him. She knew first-hand how tiresome running a company could be. She knew the President was doing nothing but sit on his desk and smoke his expensive cigar whilst his son was all around to attend meetings and sign deals that he should be doing himself.</p>
<p>Nonetheless, she too didn’t think much about it. She just worked, and worked, and <em>worked. </em>She knew <em>now </em>why she had been working so tirelessly all these years and she was happy doing so. It just kept her mind off things. <em>Things</em>, that were either painful memories, or just <em>things that she didn’t want to think about like this one. Him and her.  </em></p>
<p>She didn’t know how much time had passed when she finally finished. She sipped down her <em>fifth coffee? </em>She never really kept count. She only wished she was in her company’s tower with the rest of her employees. She had missed <em>bossing </em>people around. Maybe a few years back, she hated entering the reception of her tower and having people interrupting their chatter with each other and just rushing to do their tasks <em>because the boss was there</em>. But she could use <em>just that right now. </em></p>
<p>She took another last sip from her coffee and she noticed something wasn’t right. Something reflected on her glasses. The figure of a man approaching from behind. A gun in his hand and he did look like that <em>handsome</em> Night Manager she had met <em>yesterday</em>. She frowned. <em>Well, what a pity</em>. She would have to <em>drown</em> him after all.</p>
<p>He shot, but she rolled off her chair and out of the way. She kicked his hand, making him drop the gun. She side-kicked him harshly on his stomach knocking a gasp out of him. He tried to punch her, but she caught his hand and punched him in the face instead.</p>
<p>“Ow!” She shook her hand as the pain spread on her knuckles. She hadn’t punched somebody in <em>so long. </em>But she ignored it. He drew out a knife and she jumped back before he could slice her belly. She made another step back. Her hands reached for her chair. She threw it at him but he dodged it, but the chair did give her enough time to sneak close to him. Her hand found his neck. A rough jab on the carotid artery had him falling to his knees.</p>
<p>
  <em>29, 28, 27…</em>
</p>
<p>He gasped for breath as he let go of the knife. His back landed against the wall as he collapsed on the floor and his hands reached for his neck. He couldn’t breathe. His whole body shook like a fish and she got off her stance when she realised, she wasn’t alone. She looked by the entrance of the room only to see Rufus standing dumbfounded. A gun was tight in his hand as he stared at her with wide eyes, surprised. He was about to fire until he realised that she didn’t really <em>need </em>his help. He could have never guessed she could <em>fight like that</em>.</p>
<p>“What are you doing with that gun? Put it away,” Hannah said before she turned at the dying man and she knelt beside him.</p>
<p>Rufus took a look at his gun before he shook his head and settled it back in its case beneath his jacket. Once again, he was reminded that he didn’t know much about her after all. Hannah knew she didn’t have much time as she knelt beside the man, who was still gasping for air. There was no use. She had blocked all blood flow to his brain.</p>
<p>“You’ve got nineteen seconds till you die. I can reverse it if you tell me who sent you or else, I’ll let you drown in your own blood,” She said, making sure she kept count. She didn’t want to kill the man because he obviously wasn’t at fault. She just needed to know <em>who else </em>she should go for next.</p>
<p>“C- Corneo…” The man answered immediately and she gritted her teeth for a short moment before she jabbed again that same artery on his neck and the man began to breathe again. His hands found his neck as a few droplets of blood slipped out of his lips and he sucked deep breaths, trying to recover the oxygen that he lacked.</p>
<p>“What does Corneo want with her?” Rufus demanded, but the man was too occupied with trying to breathe than to answer the question. Rufus’s patience was limited after an entire day of <em>useless </em>meetings. He grabbed the collar of the man’s shirt and urged him back up on his feet as if he weighed no less than a boneless ragdoll. “I won’t ask twice,” Rufus growled as he slammed him against the wall once more and the man gasped. He raised his hands in surrender. Eyes widened in terror.</p>
<p>“I don’t know! He didn’t say! I just do what I’m paid to do!” <em>Oh- </em>but she knew what Corneo wanted from her. Rufus knew the man wasn’t lying. He had no reason to lie especially <em>now </em>that his life was threatened, cornered by two people.</p>
<p>Rufus let go of his collar and punched the man hard on the head, knocking him unconscious on the floor. He turned to Hannah and she didn’t look frightened. <em>Not in the least</em>. Wasn’t she supposed to be shaking in terror? A man had just tried to take her life? <em>Nay-</em> she had almost killed a man just a few seconds ago. There was <em>so much </em>he didn’t know about her, <em>wasn’t there? </em></p>
<p>“What does Corneo want from you?!” Rufus demanded and at that, she took a step back, fending away from him.</p>
<p><em>Of course, this man would have been sent by Corneo</em>. Corneo was the only <em>client </em>that she had failed to <em>kill. </em>She frowned. “Nothing. I’ll just need to find him after our deal is done and make sure he doesn’t try to kill me <em>ever again</em>,” She tried to turn around and walk away, and end the conversation there, but, <em>no</em>, her reply wasn’t the answer he was looking for.</p>
<p>He was tired of waiting. She’d either tell him or he would have to <em>make</em> her. He had no time, neither the mood to keep playing that <em>ridiculous</em> game. He grabbed her hand and harshly shoved her against him. His fingers dug in her forearm as she crashed against his chest. She tried to punch him in the stomach, but he grabbed her hand and immobilised her, trapping both her hands between their bodies. His breath hit her lips, fast and heavy. He <em>was </em>angry. He was <em>furious. </em>He had no time to deal with this <em>bullshit. </em></p>
<p>She fought against him but she eventually stopped. There was no use. She didn’t know some brilliant techniques so that she could fight him. All the fighting she knew was just enough to protect herself during the years she had spent living in the streets of Wall Market.</p>
<p>“How am I supposed to protect you when I know nothing about you?!” Rufus’s voice came harsh and raspy. Anger flickered in his icy-blue eyes as they met hers.</p>
<p>“When did my safety become so important to you?!” Hannah cried out.</p>
<p>Her hands fisted once more, trying to escape the grasp of his own, but his fingers tightened around her wrists. She was so helpless against him. She tried stepping on his feet, or even kicking him, but he didn’t bulge. He wasn’t going to let her go until he had an answer. For all he knew, she could wake up one night and <em>kill </em>him. He had no idea what she was capable of.</p>
<p>But she felt trapped there in the tight hold of his arms and she panicked. She panicked because it felt so, <em>so </em>familiar. She had been in such a tight spot before. She hated that the <em>atrocious </em>memory came back to her. She remembered trying to break free from <em>other men’s </em>tight grasp and failing. Her screams were still loud in her ears and the pain of bruises was still sensible. She could never understand how mere <em>memories </em>could hurt so much.</p>
<p>Tears blurred her vision. “When did anybody ever care about my safety?” it wasn’t a question that she was addressing to him. She was trapped and he was her captor and her history of traumatising experiences let her know that something painful was supposed to follow.</p>
<p>And that’s when she realised, she couldn’t breathe. <em>No. Not again. </em>She was having another shock and, suddenly, <em>breathing </em>became <em>so, so hard </em>to do, she had to gasp for air. </p>
<p>Her questions <em>did </em>catch him off-guard. <em>Why did he care so much about her safety? </em>What would he do if something happened to her? <em>No. </em>He’d never fall down that path. But why did she fight so hard against him? She was terrified because he had her trapped, as if she had been in such a situation before. The fear that he was expecting to come from her, it was finally bursting out <em>now</em>, because he was holding her like that and he immediately let go of her.</p>
<p>He didn’t want to induce a panic attack in her, but she was struggling to breathe and he genuinely felt terrible for causing her that. He shouldn’t have gone so hard on her, and sometimes he was surprising himself with his <em>impatience</em>. He had always been patient. <em>What was wrong with this time?</em> Maybe it was the idea of something happening to her.</p>
<p>The moment he saw a gun pointed to her head, he wanted nothing but to rip that man apart. In the end, he found that he was nothing but <em>terrified. </em>Terrified of something happening to her. His hands found her face. He cupped her cheeks with a tenderness that he never had before and he brought her attention back to him.</p>
<p>“Breathe, Hannah,”</p>
<p>Her whole body shook. Her fingers were cold as they found his hands and tried to push them away from her face. “P- Please, Rufus, let go-”</p>
<p>Rufus did let go, just like she had asked. He pulled his hands back, but his eyes didn’t let go of hers. “I’m not going to harm you. I never will,” he reassured her and at that, her breathing slowly started to ease down. She wiped that one tear that managed to roll down her cheek and she wrapped her arms around her.</p>
<p>Could she really believe him? Did he really mean that? Up until now, he hadn’t lied to her. <em>Why would he do it now?</em></p>
<p><em>When did my safety become so important to anyone? </em>He knew those words shouldn’t have affected him <em>at all</em>, but they still stormed around his mind, and the more they did, the more they <em>hurt. </em></p>
<p><em>What </em>had she gone through? He <em>needed</em> to know.</p>
<p>He needed to know <em>how </em>to help her when she ended up like that. Her hands were tightly wrapped around herself, trying to ease the shaky movement. Those small gasping sounds that she made. Her asthmatic shock hadn’t eased down yet, and he hated watching her like this. But what he hated the most, was the fact that he had caused to it to her.</p>
<p>“Come here,” He said as his hand found her shoulder and she didn’t flinch away like he expected her to. She made a step closer and hesitantly approached him. Both his hands slipped around her and she buried her face in his neck. He held her tight, his response to her desperate plea for consolation. A hand reached up running through her back and finding her hair. His fingers tangled in the golden curls and she slowly calmed down.</p>
<p>Her arms slipped around his shoulders and she hugged him back. She did not remember anybody else ever hugging her like that. She felt a soft caress on her back, and a steady heartbeat beneath her chest, his own. She sighed in his neck and closed her eyes. Maybe he <em>indeed </em>meant it. Rufus would never harm her and she knew it, but traumatising memories were hard to deal with. She had been through a lot. How was she supposed to explain all of this to him?</p>
<p>He had a right to know since they were on intimate terms, and according to their contract, he was supposed to protect her those fifteen <strong>days</strong>. But it was just so difficult to speak about it.</p>
<p>“I’m sorry I can’t tell you, but it’s just… it’s just so hard to-” She tried to say but he cut her.</p>
<p>“I apologise. I didn’t mean to go that far,” Rufus pulled back and looked down at her. His hand found her cheek and she closed her eyes when she felt his warm, tender touch. She wasn’t used to it. She felt a soft, silent kiss on her forehead and she sighed, finally relaxed. “Why don’t you go rest? I’ll take care of the body and join you,”  </p>
<p>◄ ◊ ► ◄ ◊ ► ◉ ◄ ◊ ► ◄ ◊ ►</p>
<p>She did as he had asked. She just lied down on their bed and just revelled in the warmth of the sheets. <em>There is no better comforter than a bed</em>. That was for sure. But she bit her thumb as she stared blankly at a random spot in the room. How could she act so <em>weak? </em></p>
<p>She groaned and tried to ignore scolding herself. How was she supposed to tell him what he wanted to hear? <em>Her past. </em>How can anybody talk about something like that so easily?</p>
<p>Hannah sighed as she switched sides and buried her face in the pillow. There was indeed <em>no better comforter than a bed. </em>She didn’t know how long she laid there. She just knew she heard familiar footsteps approaching after a while.</p>
<p>Nevertheless, <em>Rufus Shinra</em> didn’t look like an impatient man no matter what happened a few minutes ago. He probably had a rough day, and coming back to <em>this </em>wasn’t something that she should be expecting him to deal with. It made sense that a composed man like Rufus would lose his composure and maybe his reaction wasn’t one that she should blame. She didn’t blame him for anything, <em>actually</em>. He <em>indeed </em>had a right to know, because, <em>after today</em>, it was obvious that she <em>did </em>hide a very complicated past. It was obvious that she was a threat.</p>
<p>She felt weight pressing down on the mattress as he sat beside her. She opened her eyes and met his. His black tie was slightly loosened. A button of his white shirt was unbuckled. His black jacket laid on a nearby chair, and a strand of hair touched his forehead. He was tired, that much was clear, but he looked down at her in a way that she never thought he’d look at her. <em>Worried. </em>He was <em>genuinely</em> worried.</p>
<p>Sometimes, she wished she could read what he was thinking. <em>Why </em>would he be worried? Why would he look down at her like that? Why was he still in these clothes, wasting more of his precious time whilst he should be working or resting? She could tell none of these and maybe he couldn’t tell either. His hand, unbeknownst to him, reached for her face and cupped her cheek.</p>
<p>“How’re you feeling?” He asked.</p>
<p>The corners of her lips slightly quirked up and she found herself leaning on his hand. “I’m good,” she said reassuringly. She <em>was </em>good. She was fine, and she hated watching him being worried. She was wasting his time, <em>wasn’t she?</em> She was being a burden, <em>aren’t I? </em></p>
<p>Rufus let out a sigh. Was that <em>relief?</em> He couldn’t tell, but he did feel relieved <em>now </em>that he knew she was better. He nodded and tried to pull his hand away, but her fingers found his and she kept him there. It was time she told him. She knew she shouldn’t speak about it to him because he would never look at her the same if he knew who she <em>actually was </em>and <em>what she had actually done</em>. <em>Or maybe I could skip that part</em>. But she knew sooner or later this moment would come and it was time she let him know.</p>
<p>He was about to wake up and let her be, but her hand held him down. He turned and looked at her. The worry returned on his face as her fingers clenched around his.</p>
<p>“I will speak,” She was sure she was going to regret those words.</p>
<p>And at that, he sat back down. Her hand let go of his as she propped herself in a sitting position and took a moment to think of <em>where </em>she should start. He was staring at her in utter curiosity, but still slightly frightened that talking about it would trigger another shock. He didn’t know why he hated it <em>so much </em>to watch her <em>struggling to breathe. </em>Or actually, he at least knew <em>who </em>she reminded him of.</p>
<p>“So, uh…” a hand reached for her forehead and she rubbed the insistent ache away. This was probably a bad idea, but she felt like she could trust him. She didn’t know if she <em>should </em>trust him. What they had was nothing more than a deal, yet it felt like <em>so much more. </em> </p>
<p>“…I guess it all started when my father died,” She chuckled bitterly as she remembered her father’s funeral. “I was ten, Reno was eight. Mother became a Mako-addict, and who was a better supplier for refined Mako but Corneo, back in the day, am I right?”</p>
<p>He could tell she was trying to look away from him. Her fingers messed nervously with the bedsheets as she sucked in another deep breath. <em>Don Corneo. Of course, </em>the biggest drug dealer. Head of human trafficking in the entirety of Midgar. <em>Of course. </em></p>
<p>“So, you see, mother sold me and Reno to Corneo for Mako,” and she remembered again <em>that day</em>. “I guess her purchase didn’t go well. He shot her, right in front of us. Reno didn’t understand much back then. Just a gunshot really. And something hot and slick splashing across our faces. Mother’s blood,” Hannah sucked in another deep breath, trying to blink the tears away. She did not want to cry, but she knew that she would eventually. Rufus found himself biting his tongue. He of all people knew better than anybody how it felt watching his mother die. </p>
<p>“We barely escaped Corneo’s thugs. We spent the next two years begging in the streets. But you know, it was later that I realised… I never got to say goodbye to neither of them,” She said.</p>
<p>She was talking about her parents, <em>of course</em>. She remembered crying in the streets with her brother. Two, dirty little, helpless, abandoned children. Her father just <em>died </em>one day with no reason. Just news that came with a letter. And then their mother too, and it all happened so fast. They were so little, cast aside in such a cruel, <em>cruel </em>world.</p>
<p>“But then things got better when an old man found us. He took us in, gave us a job. He had a piano bar. He taught me how to play and fend for myself. Not long after, Reno got enrolled in the Turk Academy and I had to do anything to provide for his tuition. We relied on that old man until… well…”</p>
<p>It was so hard to speak for the rest. She didn’t know <em>how </em>to say it. How can anybody speak of such things? She had never told Reno. Reno didn’t have to know. She didn’t want to make him feel burdened for all those things that had happened to her. He was her little brother. <em>Of course, </em>she would give everything for him. <em>Of course</em>, she would sacrifice it all and she would do it again if she had to.</p>
<p>But her hand reached for her face as she remembered <em>that </em>day. What was she supposed to say? “The old man’s son too was a Mako-addict. He found out that me and Reno were more of a family to his father than he was. And just when I thought things were getting better. they just…”</p>
<p>
  <em>A scream of horror erupted from her throat as blood sprained on her face and the white piano keys were suddenly covered in red. The loud bang of the gun hit her ears and the old man froze. He would’ve fallen off the piano bench if she hadn’t caught him.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>“It’s alright, little one. You’re strong…” he winced. A drop of blood slipped down his “…you’re too strong…” he coughed. He coughed harshly and his son started shouting and cursing and yelling, but she couldn’t hear him. Her ears still buzzed from the gunshot but all she could hear was the old man’s voice. “…you’re my lil’ pianist, after all,” he tried to give her a smile before his eyes slipped away. His smile faded and he stopped breathing. </em>
</p>
<p>“…and then the others, they… pinned me down and they… they…” She couldn’t say it. The tears were streaming down her cheeks and she just shook her head giving up. She couldn’t go on with that story. She just couldn’t. It was all coming back to her, and it all hurt so much. She wept.</p>
<p>She felt hands around her. He pressed her against him and he let her cry against his chest. Rufus could’ve never guessed that something like that had happened to her, but the mere idea of it made his blood boil in anger. It made him furious. His hands tightened around her. If he knew, he would never make such a deal with her. He knew <em>now </em>that he should be gentler from <em>now</em> on. At least, until their deal was done.</p>
<p>And after it was done, <em>what then? </em>He didn’t want to think about it. He told himself that he would go back to normal. His father, <em>finally </em>out of the way, and he, ascending on the colossal company’s throne. <em>And what then? </em>She wouldn’t be there, <em>would she? </em>He couldn’t understand himself. Why did he want her there? Why did it feel so good being needed like that?</p>
<p>Her hands clenched on his shirt and she buried her face in his neck like a helpless child. He never thought he could see her that way. Part of him ached watching her like this, and another part of him just wanted to hold her for a little bit more. And then her hands found their way around his shoulders. “And then they sold me over to Corneo again and then-”</p>
<p>“You don’t have to say anything more, Hannah,” His hand found her hair.</p>
<p>He wanted her to stop crying. He hated watching her being like that. His hands slipped around her and picked her up, and gently settled her on his lap. Her legs wrapped around his waist and he just held her. He didn’t know how long they stayed like that, he just knew he didn’t want it to end. She had stopped crying. <em>Now </em>she was only enjoying his comfort. The kind of warmth and comfort that she had never received from anybody before.  </p>
<p>She sighed against his neck and pulled back to look at him. Her hand reached for his cheek. He did not pull her hand away. She cupped his cheek, and her fingers were gentle and warm. He did not want to pull her hand away. “Thank you… for holding me,”</p>
<p>The corners of his lips slightly quirked up in a smile, happy to find out that she had stopped crying, and her cheeks were finally dry. “We should rest,” It was the only thing that he said as he settled her back down on the bed and he got up. He changed into more comfortable clothes and vanished in the shower for a few minutes before he came back and lied beside her. His hand slipped beneath her and he brought her close.</p>
<p>She didn’t have to wake up screaming from a nightmare for him to hold her this time. <em>No. </em>This time she rested her head on his chest and listened to his heartbeat till it matched her own. His fingers played with her hair till the two of them fell asleep.</p>
<p>No further words were needed.   </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0013"><h2>13. dear self, can you please stop fucking falling?</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><strong>IT WAS THE <span class="u">MORNING</span> OF THE 12<sup>TH</sup> DAY</strong> when she realised, <em>he was there</em>. The days passed faster than she expected. Rufus had been going on meetings every day. He had stuff to take care of, and she too kept working online. The sixth day of their stay finally dawned. The cool morning breeze brushed gently on her exposed shoulder and the sunlight gently penetrated her eyelids. Hannah stirred, expecting to wake up on their double bed all on her own. But then she realised, she wasn’t alone.</p><p>Rufus wasn’t up and missing for work. He was there, still in deep sleep. Soft, quiet snores escaped his nose. His hair -for once- it wasn’t perfectly set, it was a mess and she preferred it that way. A hand was tucked beneath his pillow to keep his head stable. His body was turned at her. His lips looked so soft. His face, peaceful whilst he slept, as if all thoughts that usually seemed to bother him -and she would always bite back her curiosity to ask him about them- <em>now </em>they just seemed to be far, far away.</p><p>He was wearing grey pants and a light grey comfortable t-shirt that clung on the muscles of his chest. She found that she liked watching him like this. Peaceful and quiet -not that he wasn’t always quiet. She found that she had been staring at him and she immediately shut her eyes, making sure she scolded herself for these thoughts. She couldn’t allow herself to <em>fall</em>. <em>Not for this man.</em></p><p>Tomorrow they would leave Costa del Sol, and after that, it was only three days left of their deal. She couldn’t let herself fall <em>now. Now </em>that it was almost over. She just had to <em>keep it together </em>for a few more days. But she certainly did not want to think of life after this. <em>Life without him.</em></p><p><em>No. </em>It shouldn’t be saddening her. She wasn’t some helpless woman that needed to cling onto a man for comfort and support. She had been standing on her own for so, so long. The story she had given him the other day wasn’t even half of what she’d been through. She sighed. She couldn’t understand.</p><p>She couldn’t understand <em>how </em>and <em>why </em>-of all people- Rufus Shinra acted <em>humanely</em>. The son of the most <em>inhumane </em>person on Gaia and he was so, <em>so </em>different. <em>Holding her to sleep? Helping her deal with her panic attacks?</em> No one had helped her like that before. No one had shown such tenderness to her. Was this why she was falling? <em>Probably. </em>This was going to turn to a disaster, <em>wasn’t it?</em> Things were going to go wrong because every time something good happened, something would go <em>wrong </em>and then she would have to start over.</p><p>“Come closer,”</p><p>She heard his voice and she snapped her eyes back open. He had probably noticed her being awake. She wasn’t putting any effort into faking it, since she thought that he was asleep. But he wasn’t. His eyes met hers and she drowned in them for a short moment, trying to read his intentions.</p><p>But she did as she was asked. She shifted closer to him, allowing his hand to slip beneath her as she rested her head on his shoulder. Her nose found his chin and both his hands slipped around her, sneaking beneath her shirt to touch her skin. Warm fingers traced her back tenderly and her hands found his chest, pressing flat against it. She found herself dumbfounded once more. Confused as to <em>why </em>he was being so good to her. Confused as to <em>why </em>she enjoyed it <em>that much. </em>She never <em>cuddled </em>with <em>clients</em>. It was never part of the <em>job</em>.</p><p>She didn’t want to ponder on any of these <em>now</em>. She allowed herself to bury her face in his neck and close her eyes. She sighed. The warmth, the consolation. It felt so nice to be held. She could never get used to it. She didn’t know what she was doing and what she was thinking. Rufus probably didn’t know either. He just knew he wanted to hold her a little bit more because the days were ending, and he’d have to allow her to leave.</p><p>“Are you free for today?” She asked as she pulled back to look up at him.</p><p>“I’ve got a business dinner in the afternoon. You’ll be my escort, and then I’m done here,” Rufus answered and then he arched an eyebrow “Disappointed?”</p><p>She was certainly <em>not</em> disappointed to have him all to herself for an entire day. But then again, she did consider the fact that he had paperwork to take care of. He wouldn’t have time for her and maybe <em>that was for the best</em>. She shook her head, and against her better judgement, she said “Not at all…” yet she was still hesitating. She wasn’t sure if she <em>should </em>say that. She couldn’t imagine the <em>consequences</em>, but she said it anyway, “…I’m glad you’re here,” and for once in her life, she was being honest.</p><p>His hand reached for her cheek, cupping her face and she held back the need to lean on his fingers. She was too consumed in his intense gaze. He leaned in and pressed a kiss on her forehead, then gently kissed his way down to her temple, and then, he found her cheek.</p><p>He couldn’t help but ponder on what happened <em>yesterday</em>. The way she fought that man. She had nearly killed him. It all seemed like they felt normal to her. Fighting and bringing somebody to the brink of death… <em>yet</em>, she longed so much for his touch. His hugs, his kisses. She longed so much for solace. There must have been more that she had yet to tell him, but he couldn’t let her go on <em>yesterday</em>. He didn’t <em>need</em> to know more. He didn’t <em>need </em>to watch her cry.</p><p>He felt there was no other reason to ask her, apart from that curiosity that he didn’t know where it had come from.</p><p> And then he found that his weight was pushing her down. He had propped himself on his arms that were planted on each side of her head on the mattress. She didn’t seem frightened, nor was she trying to push him away. He didn’t want to make her experience more of those memories that made her a mess, so he stopped. He stopped pressing kisses and he pulled back and looked at her, seeking approval that he wasn’t expecting to get.</p><p>He only wished he would’ve known sooner. He would’ve never suggested such a deal. But her lips were slightly parted. Her breathing, uneasy, but the kind of <em>uneasiness</em> that should not worry him. Her pupils, slightly dilated as she looked up at him, hazed and mesmerised. Her hand reached for his face. Her thumb stroked his cheek.</p><p>“Rufus-”</p><p>“Hannah-” He sighed. This was so <em>wrong. </em>He should have never made that deal. He <em>couldn’t </em>fall. But her fingers were so warm and so gentle on his cheek. It had been so long since anyone had touched him that way. “I can’t- I <em>don’t</em> <em>want </em>to trigger any unpleasant memories to you,” He said, and he was trying to figure out <em>why </em>he had said that. <em>Why </em>did he hate <em>so much </em>to watch her get hurt? He <em>shouldn’t have attachments. By any means necessary,</em> <em>he shouldn’t</em>. She gave him a smile and he hated how much <em>beautiful </em>he found it to be. <em>Oh no. </em>This was a mistake. A terrible one. He was <em>falling </em>and he had no control over it.</p><p>“Just kiss me,” She said, and he wished she would have never said that. She couldn’t believe she was asking him to do that. His breath found her lips as he found himself leaning closer, and closer. He had kissed her so many times already. Why was he afraid so much to do it now?</p><p>Their noses met, and their eyes focused on each other’s lips. He <em>needed </em>to kiss her, but not because of their deal, neither was it an effort to remind himself and herself that she was there to please him and nothing more. He just needed to kiss her for a different reason this time, and he was still hesitating because he knew where it all led. She had <em>asked</em> him so. And that <em>sure</em> was a sign of approval.</p><p>He finally connected their lips, but he did not push in. He did not invade her mouth like he usually would. He kissed her slow. A tender press of his lips against her own. And then he licked her lower lip, to make sure she let him in. She parted her lips and she met his tongue with hers. His taste and his scent filled her senses and she sighed in the kiss.</p><p>He didn’t know how long they kissed. Her hands found his head and tangled into his hair and he revelled in it. He slipped away from her lips and found her neck. He kissed and suckled gently on her skin. He did not want to bite her. He did not want to <em>mark</em> her. He just wanted to make her feel <em>loved</em>. And he <em>hated</em> himself for that. But he found there was no reason to waste time on trying to resist it anymore.</p><p>His hands were all around her. Pushing her shirt up, tracing his way down her waist to her hips, supporting her parted legs around his waist. She wasn’t pushing him away, and if he went on, he knew he wouldn’t be able to stop. He was kissing and licking and tasting her skin, and she let out a soft moan that made his blood run hot down his body.</p><p>He stopped when he found her chest. He lifted his head back up to check up on her and it seemed like she <em>wanted this. Then why was he still hesitating? Why, did Rufus Shinra, feel afraid? </em>For once in his life, he was hesitating to do something that he wanted. <em>Rufus Shinra always</em> got what he wanted. <em>Why </em>hold back now?</p><p>Hannah chuckled, noticing his hesitation. “I am tougher than I look,” she said but he obviously did not believe her.</p><p>“Tell me you don’t want this,” Rufus said and it almost sounded like an order. His hand found her face, making sure he had her attention. “Tell me <em>now</em>,”</p><p><em>No. </em>It didn’t sound like an <em>order</em>. It sounded like a <em>plea</em>. His eyes examined her face, desperately searching for <em>disapproval </em>even though he <em>needed </em>her <em>approval</em>. Maybe he wanted <em>her </em>to do it. To <em>push him</em> away because he had found that he <em>couldn’t </em>push <em>her </em>away. <em>Oh- </em>what a grand disappointment had he become? He wanted to get up and leave and send her away, but he wasn’t doing that, and -for once- he was terrified.</p><p>“I will do what you ask me to. This is our deal-”</p><p>“I’m asking you to be honest. Do you want this?” He had no idea why he was asking this. He had no idea <em>what </em>he was trying to achieve. He just knew that he needed an answer. He needed to know, and he just hated himself a little bit more, because something so small, and nugatory, felt so important. “Because if you don’t, I <em>will </em>back away, but I won’t break our deal and I’ll still help you. Just tell me,” </p><p>She just looked up at him, utterly confused and surprised. Why was he being like that? Once again, <em>why was he being so nice? </em>Maybe telling him <em>that part</em> of her past made him feel <em>bad </em>for getting her into such a deal, but there was no way he could have known. She had accepted to sign that contract because it just <em>wasn’t </em>the first time that she would get hurt and robbed of her dignity. She had nothing else she could lose except maybe her company.</p><p>And <em>now </em>she just stared up at her enemy, her lover. She couldn’t tell <em>what</em> they were. Not anymore. She wasn’t sure if they even <em>were something </em>more than just business partners<em>. </em>Her hand found his face and her thumb stroked his cheek and she guided him down her. She was going to regret those words but she spoke them out anyway.</p><p>“I <em>do </em>want this. I <em>do </em>want you. I <em>don’t </em>want to break our deal. Not <em>now</em>,” <em>Not ever</em> “I’m yours for just a little while. Let me be,”</p><p>Was she really <em>asking </em>that of him? It was the first time she had ever asked to be <em>somebody’s</em>. She had belonged to so many people but she wanted none of these as much as she wanted <em>this now. Him</em>. Why was this so wrong? It all felt so wrong, that for a moment she thought about <em>running away</em>. Hannah Sinclair had only thought a few times about running away in her life. This time, she was terrified. She was <em>terrified</em>. She was <em>falling</em>.</p><p>He caught her lips and he kissed her like he never had before. He wasn’t trying to assert <em>dominance. </em>Once again, he was trying to convince both her and himself that <em>this was just a deal, </em>but he was failing. He was failing <em>miserably, </em>because, this time, he was kissing her -not because of something frustrating that had happened and he wanted to take it out- but because he <em>wanted </em>to. It was funny to think of how he never did what he wanted no matter how rich he was.</p><p>But <em>now </em>he <em>wanted</em> this. His hand found her body once again, slipping down her waist and reaching for her hips. He supported her legs around his waist and he let go of her lips and found her neck. He started kissing and licking and, this time, he wasn’t afraid to bite. He finally knew that she <em>actually </em>wanted this, and part of him <em>hated </em>how much he welcomed that. He hated himself for letting this get so out of hand. <em>Now </em>he did not want to think about this. <em>Now </em>all he wanted was to please <em>her</em>. <em>Oh, how the tables have turned? </em>He hated himself for that.</p><p>He helped her take off her thin, pink tank top, revealing her skin beneath. Her chest rose and fell in a heavy, rapid rhythm. He kissed and licked and suckled every bit of her. He found her breasts, drawing a sensitive nipple in his mouth. She let out a soft moan and her hands found his hair. She tangled her fingers in the messy blonde strands and pulled him closer, and for once more, he wasn’t pushing her away.</p><p>His tongue slid hot and wet across her erected nipple and she bit her tongue. She felt his hand slipping down, sneaking beneath her pants and panties. She was wet already and when he pressed against her clit, she gasped. She let her head roll back. He pushed two fingers in and her hands fisted in his hair. She guided him back up at her and caught his lips in hers. His fingers started moving inside of her as she lapped her tongue against his and she sighed in the kiss.</p><p>When he found her spot, she gasped and broke the kiss. They’re eyes met and he slowly picked up the pace till the only sounds in the room were her gasps and the wet pumping of his fingers inside of her. Hannah’s head rolled back against the pillow and shut her eyes. She let out a shout as she came hard around his fingers that brought her harshly down her orgasm. Her body shook and he did nothing but stare down at her. Her wet, parted, swollen lips. Swollen by <em>him</em>. He suddenly felt proud of that.</p><p>Light-green irises found his and her hands reached for his face, cupping his cheek. He did not draw his fingers out of her. <em>Not yet.</em></p><p>“Fuck me, Rufus-”</p><p>“Say my name, Hannah,” He ordered and she bit her tongue. He leaned close till his breath brushed against her lips and his nose met hers.</p><p>“Rufus,”</p><p>She obeyed right away. She wanted nothing but to do what he asked. <em>Oh- </em>how much did she hate herself for that. But his fingers started moving inside of her again and he added a third finger, stretching her tight walls and pressing just right. He massaged in and out and she had to shut her eyes again. Her body arched up, pressing against his, searching for deeper penetration. But then he hit her spot and she gasped.</p><p>“Again,” He said harshly. She was too hazed to remember what he had asked her to do. But then he gave her clit a harsh stroke and she gasped. Her body arched once more, pressing against his hand.</p><p>“<em>Rufus</em>…” She barely managed to let out through her heavy panting. He pulled his fingers out of her and she whined in protest. His hand reached up and he forced two fingers inside her mouth. She lapped her tongue against his fingers, coating them in her saliva and tasting herself whilst he stared down at her intensely.</p><p>Her hands reached for his pants, trying to push them off, but he caught her wrists and pinned them down above her head. “What do you want, Hannah?”</p><p>She bit her lip trying to ease her breathing. His erection pressed against her thigh and she couldn’t help but imagine how he’d feel inside of her. Her wetness coated the insides of her thighs. <em>Damn him. </em></p><p>“Fuck me,” She couldn’t believe she was asking that.</p><p>“Are you sure?”</p><p>She couldn’t say what he had in mind, she just knew that, whatever it was, she was going to love it. “Yes,”</p><p>He let out a chuckle and his grip around her wrists tightened as he leaned in and dragged his tongue all the way to her ear. His breath brushed hot against her ear and his voice, raspy and low.</p><p>“Take your pants off and turn around,” He released her hands and got off of her.</p><p>Hannah took off her pants and panties and did exactly as he had asked. She lied face down on her stomach. Her chin rested on top of the pillow and she heard him taking off his own pants and shirt. She bit her lip as she felt his weight pressing on the bed behind her. He guided his tip at her slick opening. His tongue flashed across his lips as he slowly pushed in.</p><p>She heard a low, raspy groan coming from and her own lips parted in a silent cry when he pushed all the way in and filled her to hilt. She could tell he was holding back. He leaned in. His chest pressed against her back and he pressed kisses up her shoulder blades till he reached her nape. He pushed her hair aside and he bit hard on her skin forcing a gasp out of her.</p><p>He pulled back and gently back in, stretching her once more. He slipped deep and he groaned again. He propped himself on his hands and he started thrusting. Each thrust brought him deeper until he started hitting that spot. She let out a cry. He caught her hair in a tight fist and pulled her head back, using the resistance to thruster harder into her, massaging her insides and hitting her spot again and again. The only sounds, her cries and the wet, pounding sound of his groin crushing against her rear.</p><p>She came hard with a strangled shout and she shut her eyes as he fucked her hard through her orgasm till her body shook and her abdomen clenched. He let o of her hair and her face landed back on the mattress. He pulled all the way in and stilled inside of her. His whole body pressed against hers <em>now, </em>keeping her trapped against his frame and the bed. She panted. She loved it.</p><p>A hand slipped beneath her and caught her neck. She felt his tongue sliding all the way up to her ear. He gave her earlobe a wet, hot flick “Who do you belong to, Hannah?”</p><p>“You,” The words slipped out of her lips without question.</p><p>“Say it again,” He ordered. His cock throbbed inside of her. His weight pressed her down and she wanted him to start moving again. But she knew he wouldn’t until he got what he wanted.</p><p>“I belong to you… sir,”</p><p>He let out a soft, low chuckle against her ear. His breath brushed on her wet earlobe. She shivered. “Good girl,”</p><p>Then the pace he set was exhilarating. Her lips parted for a silent scream that came later than she expected. He was thrusting so hard so fast, it felt like her whole body was being torn apart. He hit her spot again, and again, each time hitting harder and deeper, her eyes shut. A hand found her head and pushed her face against the mattress, muffling screams that could have reverberated all around the hotel.</p><p>His hand landed on her butt-cheek with a sharp blow. She let out a shout. The sting immediately traveling to her aching core. She came hard. Harder than she could ever remember coming before. But he was still taking her. He <em>fucked </em>her through her orgasm till her fingers were fisting around whatever bedsheets she could find. His hands found her shoulders, keeping her body steady and pushing her against him, pounding into her, nearing his own orgasm. His hand landed on her other butt-cheek with another sharp blow that made her come again. Her whole body shook in weakness as she clenched around him once more and growled pulling out of her.</p><p>He stroked himself till he came hard on her butt-cheeks. A hot, wet liquid touched her skin and they both breathed hard, taking their moment to catch their breaths.</p><p>“I wasn’t… too harsh… was I?”</p><p>“Rufus… never feel bad… for fucking me like that,”   </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0014"><h2>14. dear self, can you please stop fucking falling?</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><strong>IT WAS THE <span class="u">AFTERNOON</span> OF THE 12<sup>TH</sup> DAY</strong> when she finally could use one of those dresses that she usually put on during business meetings. They were going to dine with the hotel’s executives like Rufus had informed her. She wasn’t sure <em>why, </em>but Rufus did not look displeased when he saw her in a black boho style dress, with a small V on the chest and only half her back exposed. It reached just above her knees, and her hair was caught back in a bun that failed to keep back a few locks.</p><p>He wore a white shirt this time, a black tie, and a black jacket on top. Black pants and black shoes. His hair, the same as always. So simple, yet so <em>perfect</em>. She felt his hand resting on top of the small of her back as the two of them walked towards the elevator. They walked in and waited till they’d get downstairs to the resort’s large dining hall.</p><p>It took a small moment of silence. His hand was still around her, pressing on the small of her back possessively and she hated that she didn’t mind. She didn’t mind being <em>his</em>, because after <em>this morning </em>she couldn’t quite tell what she was feeling for the man who was <em>now </em>quietly standing beside her.</p><p>But she did eye him for a moment and he returned her look with his own. Her crimson lipstick made him want to smear it away with his own lips. The slit on her dress, no matter how smaller it was than the one in the other dress, it still drew his attention down to the creamy skin of her chest. One had to be close to see his marks on her neck and her chest. She had done a good job covering them.</p><p>He found her back was pressing against the wall of the elevator behind her and he had trapped her there without even noticing. She was so beautiful <em>tonight</em>. Just like the night before, <em>and the night before</em>. This was their last night there. They would be returning to Junon by tomorrow morning. He couldn’t help staring at her. Her own eyes found his, a light-green. Her crimson lips, slightly parted. Her hair, a dirty blonde with black locks hidden beneath. She was <em>breath-taking </em>even though he had had lots of women in his life.</p><p>“Rufus…?”</p><p>“Yes?”</p><p>“Why are we dining with the executives of this hotel?”</p><p>It was like he was drawn back from a haze to reality. He sighed. “Since Shinra’s offering lots of gil to save this chain of Resorts from their impending debt, the director and his two sons insisted on offering us dinner,” It was clearly a task that he did not want to attend, but he was attending it behalf of his <em>dear </em>father. <em>This will all be over soon. </em>He reminded himself.</p><p>“And why do you need an escort?”</p><p>He sighed once more, clearly displeased. “I regret to say that the director would better consider Shinra’s offer if we show something that he’ll find to his liking,”</p><p>Hannah raised an eyebrow “And what is that?” She had a bad feeling about this. He couldn’t be possibly asking her to <em>throw</em> the director <em>to bed</em> so that he could consider the offer. Rufus would never do that. <em>Right? </em></p><p>Rufus spotted the camera in the elevator and that was when he leaned closer, and pressed kisses at the corner of her lips, her cheek, her cheekbone, till he reached her ear. He couldn’t allow having the cameras to record this. His hands found their way around her waist, and he trapped her body between his and the elevator wall.</p><p>“The director values the sense of <em>family </em>above anything else,” <em>Oh. </em>He whispered against her ear, but she wasn’t quite sure she had heard right as he pressed another kiss on her earlobe before he pulled back. His hand found hers and he passed something on her fourth finger before he brought her hand up and pressed a kiss on the back of her knuckles. “So, I will also be indulging him with the presence of my <em>beloved bride-to-be</em>,”</p><p>And that’s when the door of the elevator opened and he let go of her hand and walked out without waiting for her. Hannah found herself frozen, staring blankly at the large hall that spread beyond the open doors of the elevator. <em>Wait, what? What?! </em>And then she looked down and she saw a ring around the fourth finger of her left hand. <em>She panicked</em>. <em>No. No way. </em>On second thought, she would rather sleep with the director.</p><p>Hannah hurried out of the elevator just in time before its doors closed, and she found him waiting outside for her, offering her his hand. She shot him a deadly look for a moment, that he couldn’t help but admit: <em>it was is amusing</em>. She had flushed cheeks. He could tell she was biting her tongue trying her best to hold back a couple of <em>unpleasant </em>things that he was sure she had to say. Her fingers fisted, trying to contain back the need to take off that ring, which was a simple one <em>really</em>. She was sure it was pure gold though.</p><p>But she tangled her hand around his, biting back all the curses that she wanted to throw at him, and she followed his lead, arm in arm. There was no way she could <em>walk</em> out of this. There was no way she could <em>punch </em>him. Not in front of all those passing people.  </p><p>Rufus leaned close and his lips found her ear. His breath brushed warm against her earlobe and she bit back a shiver. “Play your part well, and my <em>dear father</em> dies tomorrow,”</p><p><em>Oh.</em> She couldn’t say <em>no </em>when he promised things like <em>that</em>. She certainly couldn’t. But <em>pretending he was getting married just to strike a deal? </em>That was an <em>advanced </em>level of <em>cheating</em>. He wasn’t even bothering to think about how it would affect his and her's reputation if something like that went out in public. The CEO and the Vice President of two rivalling companies <em>now</em> wore identical engagement rings on their fingers and she wasn’t sure she could find out what that weird feeling in her stomach was.</p><p>All that Rufus cared about, was manipulating people, and he knew exactly how to do just that. It was no wonder. He had convinced <em>her</em> to sign a contract with <em>him. </em>The son of the man who had crushed her company. He really could convince anybody to do anything <em>just by a few fancy words. </em>He was brilliant. A man unlike any other. She hated that she was <em>impressed</em> by this, no matter how awkward it made her feel.</p><p>Hannah wiped away the frustration and she tried to stick to the role. How hard would it be to act like this man’s <em>bride-to-be?</em> But then she remembered, she didn’t know much about him, other than his preferences in bed. She didn’t know what he liked doing for <em>fun</em>, or what <em>hobbies</em> he had. But then she reminded herself that <em>he probably had neither of these</em>.</p><p>Maybe she didn’t have to <em>know </em>him to play that role. She just had to pretend that she did.</p><p>The piano’s sweet sound reached their ears as they entered the dining hall. They met with the old man, the owner of this large chain of local resorts, and his two sons who were no older than thirty. All three of them kissed the back of her knuckles and for a moment it looked like they were paying more attention to her than the man they were supposed to be discussing business with. This could be a sweet payback. It wasn’t in their deal to <em>pretend </em>to be his <em>bride-to-be </em>just to help him strike a deal. She didn’t give a <em>fuck </em>about his business meetings and Shinra’s interests. This was a <em>great </em>chance to show him that she wasn’t all <em>his. </em>The two sons were charming enough.  </p><p>The one son had brown-golden eyes, and the other, a soft blue, both black-haired, both dressed in formal suits, both attractive. Rufus was left to sit beside the old man, whilst the other two insisted on getting her to sit between them. <em>Oh- now</em> it <em>really</em> was amusing. She could tell Rufus was chewing on the inside of his cheek, staring at her intensely as she laughed at the other two’s <em>crappy </em>jokes. She was sure he had barely heard anything that the old man was telling him.</p><p>“So Ms. Sinclair, how come you’re here as Mr. Shinra’s escort? I thought Excel Corp and Shinra were rivalling companies,” The old man asked, at last, addressing to her.</p><p>For a small second, she did throw a deadly look towards Rufus who was sitting across her, and a small smirk was spreading across his lips as he waited for her to say <em>it</em>. She barely choked back the need to smear that pumpkin and celery soup -that he had on his plate- across his face, and instead, she forced a kind, wide smile.</p><p>“Well, you see, <em>love</em> knows no rivalries, neither antagonism in the area of business, director. Dear Rufus and I are getting married, and no matter the conflict, nothing can change that,” She didn’t know whether saying this felt disgusting or… <em>warm? Belonging? What?! </em>Had she really made that thought? How <em>dare </em>she?</p><p>“Oh my-!” The old man clasped his hands in excitement, eyes, widened as he eyed the couple. “This is wonderful! Have you told anybody?”</p><p>“We’re trying to keep things surreptitious for the time being,” Rufus cut in. He seemed pleased with her reply as both the old man and his sons seemed to have bought it. The two sons <em>finally</em> stopped talking to her and stopped <em>trying </em>to flirt. She wasn’t too grateful for that. All chances of getting Rufus jealous were <em>now</em> <em>gone. Dammit. </em></p><p>“Oh, dear! There’s no need to worry! That wonderful secret stays safe with us! Right, boys?”</p><p>“Yes, father,”</p><p>“Alright,”</p><p>“Now, you two come here and let the couple sit side by side, for goodness’ sake!” The old man scolded before the two sighed and sat beside their father as Rufus settled beside her. The butlers around them rearranged their cutlery and their dishes.</p><p>Rufus’s hand found her thigh. The warmth of his palm spread on top of the fabric of her dress, and he gave her thigh a squeeze as he leaned in till his lips found her ear. His breath brushed across her earlobe as he took advantage of the moment that the old man took to scold at his sons to whisper at her.</p><p>“What did I say about talking to other men?” She had a feeling he wasn’t talking about her reply to the old man. He was referring to the slight flirting she had done with the other two.</p><p>She drew in a shaky breath. It was no time to get turned on by that possessiveness of his that she <em>shouldn’t like that much</em>. “That I don’t reply when someone addresses me unless you allow so,”</p><p>“And what did you do?” his voice came in a harsh whisper against her ear.</p><p>“I flirted,”</p><p>“And what should I do to you <em>now</em>?”</p><p>At that, she turned and looked at him. He looked at her intensely. Hunger was clear in his eyes. He could have her right <em>here</em>, right <em>now </em>and he couldn’t care less about the eyes of the people that were spread all around the dining hall. He wanted to feel her tremble beneath him. He wanted to hear her <em>beg</em>.</p><p>“Punish me,” It was the only answer that she wanted to give, and <em>damn </em>her for the way she looked at him and the way she said that. He leaned close. His tongue flicked her ear, and hot shivers ran down her spine. His hand moved her dress up as discreetly as possible and traced his way beneath. Hannah just closed her eyes and sighed. He gave her earlobe another bite and she couldn’t care less about how many times the old man called Rufus’s name.</p><p>“…E- Excuse me, for interrupting…”</p><p>Rufus thought it was better not to move further, because if he did, he wouldn’t be able to stop, and they would inevitably lose the deal. He just forced away all thoughts of shooting that man to the head for rudely <em>interrupting </em>them, and Rufus just turned and gave them a kind smile. Hannah sucked in a deep breath, trying to focus back to reality. Her cheeks flushed. Heat spread across her face</p><p>“…I believe we have come to an agreement, Mr. Vice President. The ‘Phoebe’ chain of Resorts is yours for the spoken price. I shall be sending the contract to the Shinra Headquarters, if that’s what you see fit,”</p><p>“Excellent,” Rufus nodded as the old man offered his hand for a handshake.</p><p>“It was nice doing business with you. May you two live happily,”</p><p>“Thank you,” Hannah smiled, and Rufus gave the old man a handshake</p><p>“Now let’s enjoy dance night! I’ve brought the best tango band in town to honour our today’s decision,”</p><p>Rufus mentally frowned, knowing they couldn’t leave just yet. But Hannah found this mildly interesting. “Tango, you say?”</p><p>“Indeed, my dear. A chance for our clients to build confidence and show their talents, or just listen to the music of the most brilliant composers across the globe,” The old man explained as they all turned and watched as the band played and a few daring couples walked up to dance.</p><p>Hannah raised an eyebrow as she watched at the couples who had stood up to dance. They weren’t doing a good job on dancing tango. Tango was a difficult dance. Not many could do it. She cringed and tried her best to focus on her food. She couldn’t handle watching so many wrong dance-moves at once.</p><p>“Do you dance tango, Ms. Sinclair?” The old man asked.</p><p>Hannah tried to hold back a smirk. “I know a thing or two,” <em>Gosh, </em>she was being so modest, she was impressing herself. The band was playing well nonetheless. The violin strings were blissfully <em>violated </em>-<em>just like in every tango piece</em>- and the accordion player was virtuosic enough. An impressive band indeed, just like the director had promised.</p><p>“And what about you, Mr. Vice President?” The old man asked turning at Rufus, whose eye slightly twitched in irritation, and she knew he wanted to kill that man in an instant. Alas, he could not do that. Instead, Rufus turned and forced a kind smile.</p><p>“Sadly, I do not think that I-”</p><p>“Oh, what do you mean, darling?” Hannah cut in and Rufus pursed his lips, hands fisted on top of his lap in anger that he was visibly suppressing.</p><p>He was going to punish her after this, wasn’t he? <em>She was counting on that</em>. But it wasn’t in the deal to pretend to be his <em>fiancé</em>. And it also wasn’t in the deal to force him to ridicule himself dancing tango with her. Hannah turned at the other three.</p><p>“He’s just being modest. He’s so talented when it comes to tango, aren’t you, darling?”</p><p><em>Oh, Gaia, </em>the glare that he shot her made her bite her lip in the effort to keep the laughter back. She sipped on her champagne hiding the ever-growing smile on her lips. A hand clutched around her stomach trying to ease the need to start laughing like a hysterical maniac. The funniest of all was that she didn’t even know if he <em>could </em>dance tango. For all she knew, she could have him ridiculed in front of the eyes of so many people -most of them, significant business partners of Shinra’s. She was nearly suffocating in trying to keep her laughter back. She was sure her face was almost as red as a tomato. <em>I don’t mean to be that mean, I swear</em>.</p><p>“Well then if you both do, you better go show them how it’s done!” The old man said excitedly, and that’s when Rufus’s glare became even deadlier. But he had a deal with this man that he -in no way- wanted to break, after trying so <em>hard </em>to close it.</p><p>Rufus only wished she wouldn’t do anything stupid to ridicule him in front of all those people.</p><p>“If you so wish, my dear,” He said, replacing the deadly glare with a kind, loving smile that a man would give to his fiancé. It was even more amusing to know, that he probably wanted to <em>skin her alive</em>, but he couldn’t, and he hated it. She <em>loved </em>this. She hadn’t had that <em>need </em>to laugh so much in her life before.</p><p>Before Hannah even had the chance to say whether she accepted or not, Rufus grabbed her hand and pulled her off her seat, guiding her in the middle of the dining hall where all the other couples danced. If she wanted a dance, <em>oh- </em>he’d give her a dance. One that she’d <em>never </em>forget.</p><p>Hannah held back a yelp of surprise as he forcefully dragged her with him. She parted her lips to speak, but she never got to it when she realised the new piece had just started.</p><p>He took the lead right away. His hand slipped tight around her waist, the other caught her own, trapping her fingers in his. Her hand slipped on his shoulder and he began the fast tango walk. Cross-system, right and left. She focused and followed his lead. The tempo was fast, but she had danced faster. He walked forward with a few rock steps that she followed, walking backwards. Then he used traspie steps, spinning her body around whenever he wished to, following the fast rhythm of the piece. <em>Damn. </em>He was good at this.</p><p>Then his hand tightened around her, forcing her to bend back. He leaned over to her. Her hands found his hair as she felt his nose dragging its way from her neck, down to her cleavage, as much as the slit of her dress would allow. He pulled her back up. She used the ochos system backwards, twisting and spinning her body, whipping her foot behind her, but she did catch his eyes. That icy-blue gleamed with <em>hunger</em>.</p><p>He stopped her fast steps, dragging her foot with his own. He swept her foot on the right. She tried to take another step, but he caught her foot with his own again and dragged her to the left, letting her know that she could <em>go nowhere </em>and <em>do nothing </em>without him <em>telling</em> her so.</p><p>His nose met her own. Their eyes locked. Tense gazes, whilst their bodies twisted and turned in perfect synchronisation. Couples with years of marriage around them, could not dance like this.</p><p>This was their first time. The tango slowed in the second half. A small break in the melody. Her back crashed against his chest. His hands wrapped her own around her, trapping her body against his. His breaths found her ear. Hot and erratic from the tension. His hand slipped upwards following the high-pitched note of the violin. His fingers were warm even above her dress, sliding across her belly, her breasts and found her neck.</p><p>He was teasing her. She knew it. And <em>damn </em>him because it was working. But <em>no. </em>She turned around to face him when the rhythm got fast again. She walked forwards, taking the lead, urging him to rock-walk backwards. She could tell it was angering him. <em>Her, </em>taking the<em> lead. </em>How<em> dare she?</em></p><p>She wrapped her foot around his waist. Her heel touched his black pants. Her thigh pressed against his hip and for a moment she was sure it had knocked a gasp out of him. She brought their bodies close so that their groins came in touch and he found it almost impossible to keep his hands away from her waist, her hips, the thigh of the leg that she had wrapped around him. His fingers dragged the soft fabric of the dress upwards, revealing her perfect leg beneath. His eyes met hers. A part of him hungry, another part of him <em>furious</em>. She was more than amused.</p><p>He swept her foot again with his own, urging her to pull her own away from his waist and focus on balancing. She tried to take the lead again, but she failed miserably. He was <em>breathtaking</em>. His hair fell messily on his sweaty forehead. His gaze, intense, unlike any other time he had looked at her. His breathing brushed against her face as he brought her close. Small beads of sweat formed on his forehead.</p><p>She was amused because <em>for once, </em>she was the one teasing <em>him. </em>Her body bent back once more, making sure he noticed her cleavage. Her creamy skin that spread beneath her dress. He was going to <em>eat </em>her alive once this was over. He was going to drag her back to their room, and make her beg, and tremble, and <em>scream</em>. She was being <em>disobedient </em>tonight. He had to make sure she faced the consequences. <em>How dare she test him like that?</em></p><p>But other than that, he had to admit that he was impressed. She wasn’t dancing like an average, she was dancing like a professional. And so did he. She too was impressed. She had failed to ridicule that man so it seemed, but she did not regret it. There was something so alluring about that mixed way of anger and hunger that he looked at her.</p><p>They finished with their chest crushing against each other’s. Ragged breathing and tense gazes locked with each other. His arm, tight around her as her forehead found his, and their hearts beat fast against each other’s. The couples and the people clapped for the band that had finished performing excellently another wonderful piece. But the two of them were just too wrapped up in each other, that whatever happened around them seemed to fade slightly.</p><p>He caught her hand and led her back to the table, where they excused themselves and retreated for the night. It was no time to <em>fall</em>.</p><p>
  <em>Patience. Just a few more days. </em>
</p><p>And maybe they were both making that same thought.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0015"><h2>15. dear self, can you please stop fucking falling?</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><strong>IT WAS THE <span class="u">NIGHT</span> OF THE 12<sup>TH</sup> DAY</strong> when her back crushed against the wooden door of their suite. The moment they walked in, he was onto her. His tongue was in her mouth, lapping against hers, finding her throat, urging her to gasp for breath. Their eyes shut. Her hands reached for his face, but he caught her wrists and pinned them on top of her head. He wasn’t going to let her touch him like she wanted. He wasn’t going to be gentle tonight. She had <em>disobeyed</em>.</p><p>When he was pleased that she would keep her hands trapped between her body and the door, his arms slipped down to her hips, pushing her dress up and sneaking beneath. He touched her belly, her hips, her thighs. His fingers were warm, digging mercilessly in her skin, not worrying if he’d leave bruised or not. <em>He didn’t care</em>. Only he was allowed to <em>bruise her. </em>Only <em>he </em>was allowed to touch her like this.</p><p>At least for a few more days.</p><p>He did not want to think of other men touching her like he was doing now. He did not want to remember how the other men stared at her wherever they’d go. <em>No. </em>She was all <em>his</em>. He <em>owned </em>her.</p><p>“<em>Mine,</em>” He growled in the kiss before he trapped her lower lip between his teeth and bit down till she was gasping and wincing. His tongue invaded her mouth once more, filling her senses with his taste, his scent. His hand found her breasts, pushing the soft fabric of her dress aside, revealing the black bra that she wore beneath. His hand slipped further upwards. He caught her neck, his fingers squeezed slightly, but not enough to alarm her. He pulled away from the kiss and his blue eyes met hers. He looked at her in lust and hunger. He could have her right there.</p><p><em>Oh- </em>but he had other plans.</p><p>His breath found her face. Hot and erratic. “What do I need to do to you to make you listen? Hmm?”</p><p>She hated how much his low, harsh voice turned her on. She didn’t know what answer to give. She didn’t even know if he was expecting an answer at all. But she knew she wanted him to <em>take her. Damn him, </em>for the way he looked at her. <em>Damn him </em>for how <em>perfect </em>he was. “Anything you wish to… sir,”</p><p>He leaned in. He dragged his tongue down to her neck, biting harshly there, knocking another gasp out of her for the stinging pain. “Are you sure you want me to do <em>anything </em>I wish?” He let out a low chuckle against her neck. His tongue snuck out, hot and slick. It traced around the new bitemark that he had just added. She shivered. “Think twice, Hannah,”</p><p>Maybe he was indeed waiting for an answer. But she was too wrapped up with the wonderful way he bit and kissed and suckled the skin on her neck. Adding to her vast collection of his marks. <em>Yes. </em>She <em>wanted </em>him to mark her. She was <em>his</em>.</p><p>His hand found her hair. His fingers fisted around a handful of them and he pulled her head back, exposing more of her neck and biting and licking and suckling till her body was squirming against him. “Fuck…” She let out a small whisper. Her hands twitched in a small attempt to escape that little trap between her body and the door, but she knew he didn’t want her to touch him. <em>Damn him. </em>She wanted to mess his hair with her fingers. She wanted to sneak her hands beneath his shirt and touch his back, his shoulders, his skin.</p><p>But before she could do any of these, his hands slipped around her and picked her up. With a swift move, he settled her body on his one shoulder as if she weighed nothing but a boneless ragdoll. Hannah let out a loud cry of surprise. Her belly pressed against his shoulder and her hair hung from her head. Her hands clutched on wherever she could on his chest, afraid that he’d let go and have her crushing on the floor.</p><p>But his hold was tight around her and she patted his waist. “Hey! What are you-”</p><p>Her breath was knocked out of her when he threw her across the nearby couch of their suite’s living room. She landed on the soft cushions. Her hair, a mess, her dress dishevelled. Her back found the soft frame of the couch when he leaned closer and both his hands planted on each side of her head. His nose brushed against hers. His breath, hot and harsh, hit her lips and his eyes met hers.</p><p>“I’m going to <em>fuck</em> you till you’re begging me to stop…” he growled. His hand found her neck. His thumb slipped up her chin and found her lower lip, brushing warmly across it. “…you’re <em>mine, </em>Hannah. I don’t give a fuck whether this is all just a deal…” he trapped her chin between his fingers, making sure he had her full attention “…you’re <em>mine</em>,”</p><p>And then he caught her mouth and kissed her with a wild intent. His tongue met hers in a sweet dance for dominance. She submitted. No matter how much <em>wrong </em>it all felt, her body craved him. His fingers were clutching on her dress and for a moment she was afraid that he’d tear it off. <em>I don’t give a fuck if this is all just a deal, you’re mine</em>. What did he mean by that? She did not want to think about it. She just knew that there was nothing wrong with that sentence.</p><p>Before she even knew it, he was sitting beside her and his hands were tight around her, settling her on his lap. Her knees planted on each side of his waist on the couch, straddling him. Their mouths were still on top of each other’s and didn’t seem to want to let go. Her hands found his hair. He let her. She buried her fingers in the silky blonde locks. Her fingers found his tie. His own hands were pulling her dress up, exposing her thighs.</p><p>His fingers dug bruises in her buttocks. He let go of her lips and proceeded to her neck, trapping her skin between his teeth and biting -not so- gently. Hannah threw her head back allowing him more space. She took off his tie and before she had the chance to toss it away, he caught her wrist. He grabbed the tie off her hand and tied it around her neck. He pulled on the tie, urging her lean closer as the soft, velvety fabric slightly tightened around her throat.</p><p>Their lips were merely inches apart. His eyes spread fire wherever they traced her. “You’re gonna ride me and you’re not gonna stop till you come three times. Understood?”</p><p><em>Fuck. </em>“Y- Yes, sir-”</p><p>“Strip, Hannah,”</p><p>He pulled the tie away and he watched her as her hands reached shakily for her dress, pulling it up and tossing it on the floor. Her hands reached for her black bra, unclipping it and releasing her breasts. He wasted no time to lean forward and catch a nipple in his mouth. She gasped. Her hands reached for his hair again, whilst his tongue snaked out and lapped wetly across her erected nipple.</p><p>His hand landed on her buttock with a harsh blow. Hannah let out a cry at the unexpected -but welcomed- sting. She was so wet already, practically drenching her panties. <em>It was ridiculous</em>.</p><p>“You’re not naked yet,” he reminded her. She pulled her hands away and she pulled her panties down, revealing her glistening, heated core.</p><p>He took off his shirt, tossing it away. His hands reached hastily for his belt, unbuckling it skilfully. She helped him undress before she slowly lowered herself on his length, pulling him in. Her hot, wet depths welcomed him, tightening around him like a fist. Hannah gasped as she pulled him all the way in, till his tip was reaching her far end. Her hands reached for his shoulders. A low growl erupted from his throat. </p><p>She clutched on his shoulders for leverage, but his cock pressed hard against her walls and she panted against his lips for a short moment. His hand landed on her buttock once more with a loud, harsh smack that she was sure had left a mark. Hannah gasped again. Her whole body tensed. Her walls clenched around him deliciously tight. </p><p>“Ride me, Hannah,” he ordered. </p><p>Her hands clutched on his shoulders as she pulled him out and back in. She did it again, and they both sighed in the friction. He stretched her just right as she lowered herself back to him. His hands found her waist. His fingers dug there as she took him in and out in a steadying pace till both their bodies were shaking, and sweat rolled down her back. </p><p>His tip hit her spot. Hannah cried out. His teeth found her nipple, biting gently. She rode him, till his tip was hitting again and again on her sensitive spot, and her fingers were clawing into the skin of his back. She gritted her teeth when she came. She came hard, and her body clenched around his cock and shook in weakness. Her liquids pulled him deep and he growled against her chest, planting another mark there. </p><p>Her body was still shaking in the aftershocks of the shuddering orgasm when his hand landed against her buttock again. The sting travelled right through her aching core. She gasped against his shoulder, where she had been pressing her forehead trying to catch her breath. </p><p>“Rufus…”</p><p>“Who do you belong to, Hannah?” </p><p>She bit her lip as she panted against his ear. “Y- You-” he spanked her again and she cried out. Her body tensed again. She buried her face in his neck and breathed hard against his skin. </p><p>“Say it!” He commanded and she pulled back to look at him.</p><p>“I belong to you, Rufus…” </p><p>He let out a low chuckle. “Good girl,” </p><p>And then his hands tightened around her and he started pounding inside of her. His hips lifted up, hitting harshly against hers, pulling in and out, stretching her hole and hitting her spot again and again. She cried out. Hannah buried her face on his shoulder and bit hard down on his skin, giving him her own mark. Her hands clutched on his shoulders as he fucked her in a furious pace.</p><p>Then his hand landed on her buttock again, and she came. She came hard and he fucked through her orgasm, with his hand clamped over her mouth as her head rolled back and her eyes shut. Her abdomen clenched as she cried out against his fingers and she came again, for the third time. </p><p>Now her whole being was shaking in weakness, but he was still taking her. He was still fucking her and she knew he wasn’t going to stop till he’d reach his own end. His fingers pushed into her mouth. He was going to come. He needed to come inside of her. She was <em>his. </em>He <em>owned </em>her. </p><p>He came with a loud groan against her neck. His hot cum sank deep inside of her and she gasped. Her fingers clenched in his hair and his own hands tightened around her as the two of them both took a moment to catch their breath. </p><p>He didn’t know how long it took till he pulled back and looked at her. Her forehead pressed against his. Their bodies were still trembling and joined and he didn’t want to pull out. Her hand found his face, gently touching him, and his eyes closed relishing in every tender movement of her fingers. She never knew that <em>Rufus Shinra </em>craved such tenderness. Such small touches. She caressed his cheek and she leaned in. She pressed kisses around his lips. She pressed kisses on his chin, his cheek, his temple.</p><p>How could she still treat him with such kindness and care even after he had tried his best to convince both her and herself, that she was there to please him <em>alone </em>and nothing more? No matter how much he tried, he wasn’t succeeding. She wasn’t just <em>pleasing him. No. </em>She was <em>way more </em>than he expected her to be. She was cupping his cheek in a way that no one had before, and it was such a small, nugatory act, but it meant so much. He hated himself for feeling that way. </p><p>“What are you doing to me?” He wasn’t sure whether he had asked it out loud, or whether he had just thought about it. But her smile faded and she looked down at him utterly confused. She had a feeling she knew what he was talking about. </p><p>He did not want to hear an answer. He just caught her lips again and he tasted her, and he revelled in it. He was hard inside of her again, but he did not want to <em>fuck </em>her. His hands just tightened around her and he lied her down on the couch. He propped himself on top of his two hands that planted in each side of her body. </p><p>He kissed her again, but he kissed her slow and gentle. His tongue slipped across her wet lips, asking for entrance. Something he hadn’t done a lot before. She parted her lips and let him in. Her hands found his shoulders, his hair, his chest, his face. He relished every single movement of her fingers against his skin. </p><p>He guided his tip to her opening and he gently pushed in. She gasped in the kiss but he stole her gasp away with his lips. His hands were all around her body. Her entrance clenched around him and for once he didn’t hold back a gasp of his own. </p><p>Their eyes met as he pulled back and gently back in. She let out a soft moan and a few whimpers. Her body, still weak from her previous orgasms, she still craved him. She still welcomed him. She stared up at her partner, her lover, her enemy. She still did not know. She didn’t want to know. But she knew from the way he looked at her, that she was something important to him. She knew he was important to<em> her</em>. </p><p>He pulled out and pushed back in. A little bit harder this time. Both gasped against each other’s lips and he did it again, and again, till he was once again pounding into her. Their bodies writhed and a cry escaped her lips when he found her spot. He hit against it again, mercilessly for a few more thrusts. Then his hand snuck down between their bodies. His thumb found her clit and she cried out again. He gave her clit a few strong jerks. He pinched the sensitive bundle of nerves harshly and she came. She came hard with his name on her lips and her eyes shutting tight.</p><p>Her body shook and her walls clenched around him. He took her hard and fast till he too came. He came inside of her again, and his warmth once again spread in her aching depths. He breathed hard against her chest, pressing his forehead there, allowing them both a moment to catch their breath.</p><p>His hands slipped around her, pressing their naked bodies together and he found that he did not want to pull out and pull away. He just lifted his head and looked down at her. Their eyes met once more. Her lips were slightly parted and swollen. Swollen by <em>him</em>. Her cheeks flushed a bright red that he could see even in the dim lighting of the room.</p><p>Her hand found his face again and he found himself closing his eyes and revelling in her touch <em>again </em>and he hated himself because he knew what that meant. It meant he was <em>falling</em>. He was <em>falling </em>and he should just pull away and break the deal and send her away. Away from him, and never see her again, because he couldn’t afford to fall for somebody. <em>Anybody. Ever. </em>Especially <em>now</em>.</p><p>But no matter how many times he told himself to do that, he did nothing. He stood idle. It was the first time he had ever allowed himself to stand <em>idle</em>. But he -thankfully- didn’t let this moment last for too long, because if he did, there would be no turning back. He pulled out of her and picked her up. He carried her to their bed and placed her down gently on the soft mattress.</p><p>Rufus tried to turn around and leave, but Hannah caught his hand -against her better judgement. <em>No. </em>He couldn’t lie down beside her. He couldn’t have her body press against his for the rest of the night. He couldn’t let her hands clutch around him like a scared child that sought for comfort. It always felt like she needed <em>this. Him. </em>Somebody to rely on. She probably never had this before, and <em>now </em>that she had… <em>No. </em>He couldn’t play that role for her no matter how much he wanted to.</p><p>But then she stared up at him. She didn’t say anything. It was clear that she too was regretting catching his hand and trying to make him stay. It was a bad idea <em>indeed</em>. She <em>should</em> rather sink in her nightmares than get attached to this man.</p><p>He knew she wouldn’t be able to sleep otherwise, though. He didn’t want to hear her scream in the night and undergo another series of panic attacks. He hated it when she got like this. So, his hand reached for her cheek. He cupped her face and he leaned down. His lips found her forehead, pressing a tender kiss and he heard her let out a sigh.</p><p>He pulled back. His fingers found her chin and he lifted her face up, till her eyes met his, making sure he had her attention. “I’ll only take a moment,” </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0016"><h2>16. the anticipated death of a fucking asshole</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><strong>THE BARKING SOUND</strong> of a dog reached her ears when they reached the Vice President’s Mansion in Junon. The butlers took care of their luggage and Rufus with Hannah walked out of the car only to be greeted by the staff and a pretty dangerous-looking dog that rushed towards them. Hannah arched an eyebrow. It wasn’t really a dog. A <em>genetically engineered one </em>sounded more like it. It was unnaturally larger than any species that she knew of and -<em>mind you</em>- she knew a lot of species. She too had a dog <em>once</em>.</p><p>It had sharp teeth and a large tail perking around as she approached Rufus. He gave her mane a soft stroke before she turned and looked over at Hannah. Dark Nation didn’t bark at her, nor did she try to <em>feast on her flesh </em>just like she would in every other stranger that she would spot nearby him. And Hannah didn’t cry out in terror, nor did she start running away. His dog was meant to look horrifying and threatening, but that didn’t really seem to work for Hannah as she dropped to her knees on Dark Nation’s height, and started petting her and talking to her.</p><p>“I never knew you had a dog!” Hannah squealed excitedly as her hands reached for Dark Nation’s head, and beneath her mouth, and her mane. Dark Nation seemed to -more than- enjoy. “Oh my gosh, she so cute!” Hannah rubbed her belly as Dark Nation rolled on her back and looked up at her with her mouth open and her tongue hanging on the side.</p><p><em>Alright, </em>that was definitely <em>not </em>the reaction that he expected. He knew he had more important matters at hand than just staring at how <em>ridiculously </em>well Hannah got along with his dog. He -<em>honestly</em>- thought that the sharp teeth, the red eyes, the pitch-black mane, the large tail, and body, were all <em>anything </em>but <em>cute</em>.</p><p>They should all be reasons for Hannah to scream and <em>run away</em> -and that was initially the reason why he had sent Dark Nation to be taken care of in the Shinra HQ for those fifteen <strong>days</strong>. That dog was specifically designed to create such an impression. Not to mention, that Dark Nation was also <em>specifically designed to butcher whoever stranger she met. </em>  </p><p>But maybe that last part could be explained. Dark Nation’s enhanced senses had probably caught his scent on Hannah, and he wouldn’t be surprised. It was still good to know that he had <em>marked </em>her somehow.</p><p>“What a cute, beautiful little girl…” Hannah petted her and she giggled when she licked her face.</p><p><em>No. She’s neither cute, nor beautiful. </em>Rufus frowned. But Hannah had a look in her eyes that he hadn’t seen before. It was <em>cheerful</em>. Was she <em>happy? Is that actual happiness? </em>He never knew how precious an actual, <em>happy </em>smile on her lips could look like. It was at this moment that he knew, he wanted to see her smile like that <em>always</em>. <em>Though, </em>he did remind himself, that this was just a <em>ridiculous </em>thought, and that he could never <em>achieve that</em>.</p><p><em>No. </em>He would hurt Hannah. He didn’t know how, but he knew exactly where their deal was taking them. <em>Destruction</em>. Getting too attached to Hannah was a mistake. <em>Wanting to see her smile </em>was also a mistake. <em>Gaia, </em>having her there -in the first place- <em>was a mistake</em>. A terrible mistake, because he was <em>falling</em>. The more she smiled petting Dark Nation, the more he <em>fell</em>.</p><p>“…so, what’s her name?” Hannah asked as she looked up at him.</p><p><em>Oh. </em>He didn’t know how to say this. Maybe he should come up with some name that <em>makes sense</em>. He pursed his lips, wanting to scold himself for even thinking of doing that. <em>Just say it</em>. “Dark Nation,”</p><p>And this time, the reaction that he expected, it actually came. Hannah tried her best. She tried to choke back a laugh, but it all came out with a wheezing sound and tears in her eyes. She laughed, she couldn’t help it, and she was sure that Rufus was shooting her a glare “Who names their dog ‘<em>Dark Nation’</em>…” she wiped a tear before she resumed her laughter and continued petting the dog “…oh poor girl-”</p><p>“Oh, you’ve got a better name?” Rufus asked, slightly irritated as he glared daggers down at her.</p><p>Hannah stood back on her feet, with Dark Nation clinging to her leg in a way that she never had clung to him. Rufus felt irritated about this as well. But then he scoffed, mentally reminding himself. <em>It’s just a dog. She’s expendable. Get over with it. </em>He didn’t give a damn about whose leg she was <em>now</em> clinging to.</p><p>He hated how much <em>none of that was true</em>.</p><p>“Well…” Hannah’s smile disappeared for a second “…‘Alfie’ was my dog’s name,”</p><p>Rufus took a moment to sigh and bury his hands in the pockets of his white pants. He was wearing a grey shirt beneath the white jacket. He never knew she <em>had </em>a dog. Maybe he shouldn’t have brought that up. He knew that most people that have pets get too emotionally attached to them. And that was <em>exactly why </em>he tried his best <em>not to get too attached </em>to Dark Nation. <em>All attachments fade one day</em>. He didn’t have the time to deal with the <em>pain</em> that comes when something like that <em>ends. </em>He was <em>still</em> dealing with his mother’s loss no matter how hard he tried to convince himself that he had <em>dealt with it</em>.</p><p><em>No. </em>He had to stay focused. It was going to be a <em>great day today. </em>He had to stay focused and in no way even <em>think </em>about ridiculous things such as <em>attachments</em>.</p><p>“I’m sorry,” Rufus said typically.</p><p>“No…” Hannah waved her hand and she chuckled “…Dad had gotten him for my seventh birthday. But then it all happened and so, I never actually saw him die, I just… I like to think he’s just lost,”</p><p><em>I could send Reno to find him- </em>But then he cut himself <em>right there</em>. There was no way he was wasting a -very capable- Turk to <em>find a dog</em>. <em>What’s wrong with you</em>. This was <em>ridiculous!</em> Rufus just mentally scolded at himself and nodded at her. The three of them walked into the house. It was funny to think of how the Vice President’s Residence in Junon, represented <em>home</em>. She had pretty much forgotten the sense of <em>home</em>.</p><p>“I’ll be in my office. We will not be dining together tonight. I have things to attend to in Midgar, and Dark Nation will be joining me,” Rufus informed her as he handed his jacket to a maid. “The excavations in Corel will start tomorrow at <strong>6:00AM</strong>. I suggest you start preparing your employees to come collect the amount that we agreed,”</p><p>Hannah’s eyes widened. Her jaw dropped. This was the last thing she was expecting him to say. Excitement pooled in her stomach as she let out a gasp. “You’re kidding…?!”</p><p>Rufus arched an eyebrow. He was amused by the surprised look on her face. That smile was slightly starting to form again on her lips. It triggered his own “I’m afraid I’m not. Six hundred and twenty-five million tons, correct?”</p><p>“Yes!” Hannah let out a cry of excitement, as she rushed towards him and wrapped her hands around his shoulders. She hugged him so tight, she never had before. She had to lift herself on her tiptoes to bury her face in his shoulder. His hands hesitantly found their way around her. “Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you-”</p><p>“Hannah…” His hand found her hair, pulling back briefly. “…you <em>have </em>pleased me enough,” <em>More than you should have</em>.</p><p>She realised her palms were flat on his chest, and she was staring up at him dumbfounded for a mere second. Her smile returned though, and for a moment, she was sure he was smiling too. <em>Rufus Shinra… smiling</em>. <em>Today </em>must’ve been some sort of a dream.</p><p>But then her smile slightly dropped when she remembered that they had <em>only two days left. </em>Two days for their deal to end. Which meant that in two days she’d have to move back to her little lonely apartment in the midst of Midgar. She’d have to return to the headquarters of her company that was saved. Thousands of employees were not going to lose their jobs because of the man who was <em>now </em>holding her. She couldn’t put into words how <em>grateful </em>she was to <em>Rufus Shinra. </em>The man that she wanted to <em>butcher </em>not many nights ago, <em>now</em> she just… she didn’t want their deal to end. And she hated herself for that.</p><p>Rufus Shinra was smiling, staring down at her. He was holding her. He was saving her company. He had treated her like no one had before. She was feeling <em>far </em>too happy to be <em>real</em>. Something was going to go wrong. She was sure. But she didn’t care at the moment. All she could focus on <em>now </em>was his genuine smile and the fact that he had just saved her company.</p><p>“You’ve treated me far better than anyone I’ve known, Rufus,”</p><p>And <em>dammit </em>because that was exactly what the problem was. She was <em>falling </em>for him for that very reason. He was being honest from the very beginning. He hadn’t lied to her, neither did he try to trick her. He had kept no secrets, he had helped her deal with her panic attacks no matter how many times she had awakened him in the nights. She hated to admit this, but after all these, she trusted <em>Rufus Shinra. Of all people. </em></p><p>His hand found her cheek, stroking gently her skin beneath his fingers. She closed her eyes and sighed. She hadn’t been touched like that and he <em>loved </em>how much she <em>needed </em>him. He hated himself for that.</p><p>“Hannah…” His thumb found her chin and he leaned in pressing a kiss on her forehead “…I need to go make a few phone calls. Maybe you have to too,”</p><p>Hannah nodded. “Alright,”</p><p>They both pulled away and Rufus walked upstairs with Dark Nation following from behind. Hannah did take a moment to stare at him as he petted Dark Nation’s head. “You’re really saving me and my company…” Hannah said and he stopped halfway the steps and turned to give her a look. “…and so many other people that could have lost their jobs,”</p><p>Rufus gave her a nod. “I’m just seeing the end of our deal,” And the words still tasted bitter on his tongue because he <em>didn’t </em>want their deal to end. He wanted her there. No matter how much he <em>hated </em>to have her there, he <em>wanted her there. </em>It was all so <em>complex</em>. It was so dangerous to have her there. Maybe having that deal end was the <em>best</em> thing that could happen to him. <em>The worst as well. </em>    </p><p>◄ ◊ ► ◄ ◊ ► ◉ ◄ ◊ ► ◄ ◊ ►</p><p>He had been in his office all day. Hannah did not disturb him like he had asked. She too had stayed in her room, and contacted her PAs, letting them know that the company wasn’t going to <em>sink</em> after all. The excitement on their faces was really worth all the trouble. But was that deal <em>really </em>a <em>trouble?</em> She hadn’t paid anything, apart from the small amount that she would pay anyway, deal or not. She had <em>blindly </em>given herself to this man, but he hadn’t treated her as bad as she expected to be treated.</p><p><em>No, certainly not. </em>So many times, she thought that she was falling for him. That very same morning when he told her that the company was saved and she had hugged him, and he had smiled down at her. <em>That smile. </em></p><p>Hannah found herself chuckling on her thoughts. She pulled her glasses off and she stopped signing papers for a moment as she felt Dark Nation resting her face in her lap. Hannah looked down at her and caressed the back of her head, her face, her mane. Dark Nation closed her eyes and let her touch him. What a touch-starved cute creature. <em>Just like her owner.</em></p><p>Hannah had realised night had finally fallen. Rufus wouldn’t be there. She was sure the Turks had already taken him to Midgar to <em>take care of some stuff </em>just like he had told her. She was smart enough to guess what he was going to do to Midgar. She didn’t know <em>how </em>but she knew that <em>tonight, papa Shinra was going to die</em>. She had no idea how Rufus would achieve that without being suspected. But she knew he was smart. He was smart unlike any other.</p><p>But if his father was to die <em>tonight, </em>then the weight of a colossal company would fall on his shoulders entirely. <em>Sure- </em>Hannah knew how it felt trying to keep a company standing. But the size of her own company could not be compared to the size of Shinra’s. Her own company was merely comprised by a few thousands of employees, though she was sure that Shinra had <em>way more than just a few thousands. </em>Shinra governed an entire City. Even outside of Midgar, entire sections of the world were dependent on Shinra’s energy.</p><p>And she was sure that papa Shinra had made a mess of things. Things that Rufus would once again have to make right. Hannah shook her head. She always wanted to have a father by her side, but <em>such a father </em>was <em>really</em> not needed.      </p><p>◄ ◊ ► ◄ ◊ ► ◉ ◄ ◊ ► ◄ ◊ ►</p><p>“Sure you wanna do this personally, boss?”</p><p>The coin slipped around his skilful fingers before he threw it in the air and grabbed it again, settling it in his pocket. Hopefully, he would get the chance to use <em>these</em>. He wasn’t going to answer Reno’s question and receiving no answer, Reno just shrugged and proceeded to land the chopper on the Shinra Tower’s helipad. Rufus looked at his SOLDIERs as they prepared their guns. He had his own in his hand, but things had gone <em>far </em>better than he expected they would.</p><p>His father was reported dead before his men had even the chance to enter the building. He had no idea how he had died. He didn’t care the least. He was just happy he was dead. That wretched man was finally out of his way. A smile flashed across Rufus’s lips as he stared down at the helipad and the one man that was waiting to confront him. He didn’t care who this man was. <em>He looked more like a boy. </em>It was nothing that he couldn’t handle. It was a chance to celebrate, perhaps, a good fight would be something he had missed those last few days.</p><p>Reno and Rude landed the helicopter. Rufus and Dark Nation walked out with the rest of the SOLDIERs scattering around him protectively. The other four members of the AVALANCE team were escaping. There was something familiar in the other man’s outfit. Rufus recognised it right away. The <em>ridiculously </em>large sword. The dark blue outfit that higher classes of SOLDIERs used to wear.</p><p>“You’re a SOLDIER, aren’t you?” A smirk flashed across Rufus’s lips “Which of course would mean that I own you,”</p><p>Cloud chuckled. “Ex-SOLDIER. I quit,” He corrected him.</p><p>Rufus turned at his SOLDIERs “Secure the others,” Cloud tried to get in the way and fight them but the chopper shot from above and the SOLDIERs got away. Rufus chuckled “Just the two of us…” and then Dark Nation growled, reminding him of her existence. Hannah would probably scold him for neglecting her. “…well, maybe three,”</p><p>◄ ◊ ► ◄ ◊ ► ◉ ◄ ◊ ► ◄ ◊ ►</p><p>The first thing he did was deal with the destruction of Sector Seven.<em> Dear father </em>had indeed left back quite a <em>mess</em> and -once again- Rufus had to deal with it. He couldn’t hope to get any help from his executives. He stared at them in disgust for a small moment. Tseng, by his side, the only person he could trust in there. Rufus <em>hmph</em>-ed in displeasure before he dismissed them and set off immediately to take care of the paperwork.</p><p>He had already ordered people to bring his stuff from Junon back to the Presidential Suite on the 70<sup>th</sup> floor of the Shinra Tower. He was <em>home</em>, yet again it did not <em>feel </em>like home. No place felt like home.</p><p>Rufus knew he wouldn’t be returning <em>home </em>any time soon. He couldn’t. Not until he had finished with <em>some </em>portion of the stuff that he had to deal with.</p><p>He was alone in the Presidential Suite, sitting by his father’s desk, fumbling through the endless papers and folders that had countless names on top. But one <em>particular </em>name caught his attention right away. It was a leather black folder. The papers inside seemed a few years old.</p><table>
<tbody>
<tr>
<td>
<p><strong>Name/Last Name:</strong></p>
</td>
<td>
<p><strong>Hannah Sinclair</strong></p>
</td>
<td>
<p><strong>ID NUMBER:</strong></p>
</td>
<td>
<p><strong>098 745 8672</strong></p>
</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td>
<p><strong>Blood Type:</strong></p>
</td>
<td colspan="3">
<p>A+</p>
</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td>
<p><strong>Father’s Name:</strong></p>
</td>
<td colspan="3">
<p>Benedict Sinclair (deceased)</p>
</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td>
<p><strong>Mother’s Name:</strong></p>
</td>
<td colspan="3">
<p>Gloria Midford (deceased)</p>
</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td>
<p><strong>Relations:</strong></p>
</td>
<td colspan="3">
<p>Reno Sinclair (sibling)</p>
</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td>
<p><strong>Profession:</strong></p>
</td>
<td colspan="3">
<p>Endocrinology BSc, University of Midgar’s Sector 5</p>
</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td>
<p><strong>Class</strong></p>
</td>
<td colspan="3">
<p>Scientist Class B1</p>
</td>
</tr>
</tbody>
</table><p> Rufus scoffed. <em>What is this?! </em>He turned the page. He knew that people in Shinra would make a small research on her since she governed a rivalling company, but his <em>father? What did his father want with her?</em> As far as Rufus knew, for somebody to catch his old man’s eye, they had to be something important. They had to be somebody that his father had particularly stigmatised because of something they must have done him.</p><p>Rufus turned the page only to look down at her criminal record. It was nothing but a large list of names. Names of people that he’d never known, and he didn’t care to know, he just knew that they were all <em>dead</em> and that they were all dead by <em>her. </em></p><p><strong>Total:</strong> 65  </p><p><em>Sixty-five deaths</em>. She had killed <em>sixty-five people. </em>Rufus’s eyes widened. He did not remember -even himself- taking so many lives. <em>No. </em>Something must have been wrong with those numbers. She couldn’t have killed all those people. He found it hard to believe.</p><p>But then he remembered the day that this man had busted in their room, back in the hotel in Costa del Sol, and she had nearly killed him. She had acted so quick. She had avoided attacks and she had struck so skilfully. He could have never imagined she was capable of doing that. Maybe the numbers and that list in front of his eyes, they weren’t entirely wrong. Maybe she had indeed done those things. She must have had a good reason, though. He was going to ask her.</p><p>He knew it was stupid to waste his time on something so <em>senseless. </em>There was no use. She was going to leave in two days. Their deal was going to end and he wouldn’t be seeing her ever again. But part of him <em>needed</em> to know. He needed to know what and why she had done all these.</p><p>And then he noticed her father’s name was highlighted in yellow. Maybe his father wasn’t interested in Hannah after all. It looked more like he was interested in her father. He was an employee of Shinra’s. An engineer. He had a clear criminal record, but then he turned the page, and there was an order. An old order. The paper was an ochre colour. His father’s signature laid on the bottom.</p><p>It was an order to have <strong>Benedict Sinclair</strong> killed by the <strong>Turk</strong>: Veld for <em>leaking classified information</em><em>. </em>Rufus gritted his teeth before snapping the folder closed and tossing it aside. Suddenly, the grasp of his tie around his neck was too tight. His fingers reached for his tie and he loosened it. He took off his glasses and tossed them by the desk. Rufus ran a hand across his aching forehead, pushing a few strands of hair back and he allowed himself to rest in the back of the chair.</p><p><em>Fuck. </em>He did not say it out loud. He just thought about what this all meant. If his father really had her own father murdered, then that meant that hers and Reno’s miserable life afterwards, was his own father’s doing. Rufus didn’t give a damn about what kind of <em>classified information </em>Benedict Sinclair had leaked. He just knew that if Hannah found out, <em>she would never want to see him again</em>.</p><p>And there it was, the <em>fear</em>. The <em>destruction </em>that he always knew their deal was inevitably leading them to. He should have never made such a deal with her. He should have never hugged her those nights that she would wake up from the nightmares. He knew <em>now</em> what kind of nightmares she had been having. Hannah had killed for a reason. It was no wonder that the Turks could find no information on her past. <em>Impossible to find data when all witnesses are dead</em>. She had <em>wiped</em> her data on her own.</p><p>But he should have never gotten <em>attached</em> to her. If she ever found out, she would be forever gone and- <em>No. </em>He cut those <em>ridiculous</em> thoughts. Rufus buried his face in his hands. His elbows rested by the black marble of his father’s desk. His fingers clutched in his hair. What was he thinking? He’d never made such a <em>terrible</em> mistake in his life. <em>Attached? </em>He was <em>attached? </em>He was actually <em>feeling?! </em></p><p>Anger boiled inside of him. <em>Disappointment</em>. He was disappointed in himself. What a disgrace had he become? He wanted to shove everything off that table and have it crashing on the floor. How <em>dare he </em>allow himself to <em>fall?</em> If she’d leave him <em>now</em> then what? How in the <em>world </em>was he going to deal with that very same pain, <em>again? </em></p><p>He was too young when his mother died, but no matter the age, he had promised himself, he’d never get attached to somebody no matter the reason. He should have kept that promise. <em>Alas</em>, he could not keep a small, easy promise to himself. How was he supposed to keep a promise to the world? A promise that he was going to rebuild Sector Seven. That he was going start spending gil in the benefit of his company and his employees. That he was going to make Midgar a better place.</p><p><em>No. </em>He was going to hide that folder. <em>Burn it, </em>if he must. She would never have to know. Her father’s death was the beginning of a terrible life. One that his own father had brought to her. There was so much she had yet to tell him and he did not want to hear it <em>now</em> as much as he wanted to hear it a few days ago. He just knew the rest of her past was <em>terrible </em>enough to make her a murderer.</p><p>Was he making excuses for her? Could he not accept the fact she might have been an actual murderer?</p><p>He had just <em>ascended to his throne</em>. He was disappointing himself already.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0017"><h2>17. forget me, I beg of you</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><strong>HE HADN’T</strong> returned home till the night of the fourteenth day of their deal. He had work to do, and she knew it. Hannah just stayed back in his house in Junon and gathered her luggage. She was going to leave <em>tomorrow. </em>On the fifteenth and last day of their deal. Reno would come to pick her few bags, and he was going to take them back to her apartment in Midgar.</p><p>But Hannah still debated on <em>how in the world she was going to ask him to stay. </em>She was trying to find reasons. She wanted to stay there with him. No matter how much she tried to scold herself for making such a decision, she still wanted to, and she hated herself for that. She hadn’t had so many nightmares because <em>he was there. </em>She hadn’t felt insecure nor the need to sleep with a gun in her hand, because he was there and this estate was more than <em>secure</em>.</p><p>She felt safe. She had someone to talk to and she didn’t care that he wouldn’t always be there, especially <em>now </em>that he had an entire company and an entire City to govern. She too didn’t have much time either. She too had a company to take care of. <em>Gaia, </em>was she relieved that her company was saved. She <em>loved </em>her company, but what she worried about the most was firing all those incredible people that she had worked with the last seven years.</p><p>But <em>now</em> she didn’t have to do it. <em>Now </em>she was saved. Part of her hated that she relied onto a man so much, but another part of her it just… <em>didn’t mind</em>. She had been so alone for so long. Reno was enrolled in the Turk Academy when he was fifteen and she was seventeen. A seventeen-year-old girl had only <em>one </em>place in a town such as Wall Market. Only <em>one </em>job that could promise enough gil to pay for her brother’s tuition.</p><p>She had been through so much those few years afterwards. But Hannah just shook her head, and she shot the thought away, and for once it happened so easily. Usually, she would ponder on these old memories but <em>now </em>they just stopped bothering her. She had finished work. It was the afternoon of the <em>fourteenth</em> day. He hadn’t returned home last night, and she hadn’t expected him to. She knew he had work to do. But she waited, and waited, anticipating his arrival.</p><p>When Rufus entered the house and handed his coat and his bag to the maid, the piano’s sweet sound reached his ears. It was coming from the living room. He remembered coming back from school every day and listening to the welcoming melodies that his mother used to play on that very same piano. He had moved it from Midgar all the way out <em>here</em>. And <em>now </em>he had just returned from work, and he was once more welcomed with that same sound. Rufus hadn’t realised a smile that had started forming on his lips.</p><p>Even though he was exhausted, since the only sleep that he had acquired was the one of passing out on top of paperwork, he just followed the sound to the living room. He pressed some of his weight on the wall by the entrance of the room. He crossed his hands against his chest and he sighed as he stared at her playing. She was wearing a dark blue sweater and white pants. Her hair fell on her shoulders, messy but it didn’t bother him at all.  </p><p>He recognised the piece she was playing. His mother used to play that very same piece. He was acting against to whatever his mind told him to do when he sat beside her on the bench. His hands found the keys of the higher notes. She didn’t stop playing. Hannah just turned and gave him a look and a smile. Before she moved closer towards the lower notes and she let him take care of what to play on the higher ones.</p><p>He was sloppier than she was, but he managed alright with the slow tempo. A piece that his mother had shown him how to play. He was surprised he still remembered it. He was surprised he still remembered how to even <em>play </em>the piano. He would just sit there on that bench and press those keys whenever something frustrated him. He had taken the time to learn on his own during house-arrest. He was <em>now </em>glad that he had.</p><p>Hannah chuckled. There was a feeling in her stomach that she didn’t quite know how to explain, but she knew it was just her own <em>stupid self,</em> falling, and <em>falling. Falling like an idiot. </em>But she just tried to focus on the piece till a point that it had nothing but scales. Scales that she had memorised just like the entirety of the piece. An easier part for her. She used one hand only, and slowly, hesitantly she leaned her head over his shoulder. He too used one hand only, and his left hand slipped around her and brought her close, resting his head on top of hers.</p><p>She didn’t know he could play. She had a hunch, but she hadn’t actually seen him. He never really had the time and it made sense. He had no idea what he was doing. He knew it was a mistake to sit there and play with her, and pass a hand around her, and rest his cheek on top of her hair. It was all such a terrible mistake, but he gave in. He hated himself for that, but he didn’t even think about <em>how much of a mistake </em>that was.</p><p>And when they finished the piece, his hand let go of the keys and reached for her face. His thumb found her cheek and he turned and looked at her urging her to lift her head off his shoulder and look back. His eyes found hers and he leaned close pressing his forehead against hers.</p><p>He was always keeping a strict, expressionless look on his face when he was at work. It was as if he had walls all around him, but <em>now</em>… now it all went down. <em>Now </em>his smile softened into a genuine one. He knew exactly what was happening to him, and he <em>hated</em> it. But then her hands found his face, cupping his cheeks, so gently that he had to close his eyes and lean closer. He buried his face in her neck, leaning down to her. He drew in her scent and just closed his eyes and relished in the soft caress of her fingers in his hair.</p><p><em>What is wrong with me? </em>He didn’t ponder on it a lot. He just wanted <em>her now</em>. Nothing nor anybody else. Her lips found his temple, pressing a soft silent kiss there, and his hands slightly tightened around her. Her heart was about to burst out of her chest. She was either having a heart-attack or she was just… <em>happy? Was that how happiness felt like?</em> She couldn’t tell how long they stayed like that, her hands found their way around his shoulders and she brought him close.</p><p>“Stay,”</p><p>His breath brushed across her neck and for a moment she wasn’t sure if she had actually heard him say that. Her eyes widened for a brief second, and the corners of her lips were already curling up into a smile. He pulled back to look at her.</p><p>“Stay, Hannah,” He repeated, even though he wasn’t sure whether she’d accept or not. <em>No. </em>This was so <em>wrong. Why did he say that?</em> He bit his tongue. There was no taking back those words now. “I can’t promise I’ll be spending much time with you. But we will move to Midgar and you’ll be able to go to work, and I know you will probably refuse because you were forced into this <em>ridiculous</em> deal, but just-”</p><p>Her fingers found his lips and she giggled pulling her hand away after successfully shushing him. Her heart fluttered. He was <em>actually</em> asking her to <em>stay. </em>“Are you sure I’m not a burden to you?”</p><p>Rufus shook his head. “So long as you’re not complaining senselessly,” he said sarcastically before he leaned in and pressed a kiss in her neck. Hannah chuckled and her hands found his hair again. He pressed another kiss just beneath her ear and she slightly shivered. He buried his face in her shoulder tiredly closing his eyes, whilst she caressed his hair.</p><p>“Alright then, I’ll stay…” Hannah said burying her face in his hair “…I wanted to ask you the same thing,” She chuckled.</p><p>Rufus just hummed in response. His eyelids felt suddenly too heavy. He closed his eyes and for a moment she was sure that he had almost fallen asleep against her shoulder.</p><p>Hannah smiled as his hands around her slightly loosened and his breathing gained a steady rhythm. She pressed another kiss on his temple, pulling him softly back to reality. “How about we retreat for the night?” She suggested and he pulled away from her shoulder, realising that he had almost fallen asleep there.</p><p>He ran a hand through his tired eyes and he sighed. “I got work to do that can’t wait,”</p><p>She pursed her lips. “Alright then, let me help you finish it,”</p><p>Rufus arched an eyebrow. She couldn’t tell whether he was doubting her capabilities in running a company, or whether he was just surprised that she had offered.</p><p><em>Probably both</em>. But mostly, <em>surprised. </em></p><p>He couldn’t believe that a woman with such kindness had taken so many lives. He did not want to ask her about it. She would either refuse or get another panic attack. Or start crying in the effort to explain. He didn’t want to cause her any of these. He <em>would </em>learn one day. He <em>could </em>ask Reno. <em>Alas</em>, Rufus didn’t know that she hadn’t told Reno anything. <em>How could she? </em>She couldn’t burden her brother with guilt. Guilt for something that wasn’t even his fault. She had done her <em>duty </em>as an older sister and looked out for him. <em>What kind of sister would she be if she hadn’t?</em> She had promised him she would.</p><p>“You know, I don’t own an entire City, but I do know how to run a company. I happen to have one that has lasted almost seven years now,” Hannah said and he realised she was right. She had established a company all on her own from the ground up. She probably had more experience in this than he had.</p><p>Rufus nodded. “Alright,” Even though, he had a voice in his mind <em>screaming </em>at him <em>to not let her. </em>The more time he spent with her, the more <em>dangerous</em> things got. The closer to <em>destruction </em>they were <em>heading</em>.</p><p>◄ ◊ ► ◄ ◊ ► ◉ ◄ ◊ ► ◄ ◊ ►</p><p>Hannah was sitting across him on his desk. Both wore their glasses as they stood in silence. He had given her a portion of the papers that he needed to be signed, and she had dived into work right away. It wasn’t difficult to fake his signature, considering it wasn’t a very complex one. The papers were so many. She <em>honestly, </em>didn’t feel like asking him about his plans with Midgar. But the curiosity got the better of her.</p><p>Rufus just wanted to make Midgar <em>a better place, </em>and deplete as much as possible the use of Mako. He had confessed that he didn’t agree with using the Planet’s Lifeblood for <em>profit. </em>He too had set his scientists to work on other resources of energy, that would be equally effective.</p><p>Hannah couldn’t tell how long they were sitting in his office, signing papers and talking about the future of Shinra’s and Excel Corp’s. But she knew that it was <em>pretty late </em>and if they were to finish all these by tomorrow, they probably needed more coffee than just one cup.</p><p>The staff had already retreated for the night. Hannah caught his empty mug and her own and she stood up. “I’ll go get some more coffee and be right back,”</p><p>Rufus’s hand reached for his phone. “I could call the staff to-”</p><p>Hannah chuckled “It’s just coffee,” She shrugged. “I won’t take long. Besides, I hope one day I can indulge you with my cooking,”</p><p>She gave him a smile and he returned it as he watched her exit the room and vanishing in the hall. He didn’t know she could cook. He didn’t know it was actually an attribute that he liked. Rufus just tried to focus on reading the papers that stood in front of him on the desk. His finger reached for his glasses, tucking them further up his nose before he resumed working. His eyes stung from exhaustion.</p><p>When Hannah returned with two mugs of steaming coffee, she parted her lips to speak, but then she realised he had fallen asleep on top of the desk. She couldn’t help a smile that spread across her lips. A strand of hair fell on his forehead. His face, peaceful, resting his cheek against his forearms. His glasses, trapped between his face and his arms. His dark blue shirt was unbuttoned. His tie hung messily on the back of his chair. A blue pen was still trapped between his fingers.</p><p>Hannah left the two mugs by her side of the desk, and she walked beside him, bowing slightly to his height. Her hand found his back, caressing its way softly towards his hair. The rhythmical breathing from sleep was once again cut. She hated to wake him, but she couldn’t let him sleep like that there.</p><p>She leaned in and kissed his temple. Rufus stirred slowly again and he pulled his head off the desk. Hannah settled between him and the desk. Her hands reached for his glasses, taking them off and placing them behind her on the desk. Rufus once again buried his face in her chest, and her hands, both, found his hair, burying her fingers in the blonde, silky strands. She felt his arms reaching around her waist and he sighed against her skin.</p><p>He was enjoying this more than he should be. The way she stroked his hair, and kissed his temple and hugged him. She didn’t say anything at first. She just held him caressed him comfortable silence. Her hipbones pressed back against the edge of the desk and she smiled down at him, pressing another kiss in his hair. She was so glad she was staying. She was so glad he had asked her to. She was so happy that he was there with her <em>now, </em>holding her. <em>Gaia. </em>She couldn’t believe this man was making her <em>happy</em>.</p><p>“How about you go to sleep, while I finish the rest?” Hannah suggested, and she couldn’t even believe she was suggesting that. She was going to take care of the paperwork of a <em>rivalling company</em>.</p><p>At that, Rufus snapped away from her chest and he looked up at her tiredly. “No, you’re probably tired too,” His hand reached for his glasses that rested on the desk behind her.</p><p>Her hand caught his and she stopped him. “Rufus, I’ve been home all day. I’m not tired, I swear,” She released his glasses from the grasp of his fingers and she set off to place them back down on the desk. Her hand bumped a block of folders in the process, that were shoved down the floor. “Oh shit!” Hannah cringed as she looked at the papers that had escaped their folders and were now resting all over the floor. She knelt down, pushing a strand of hair behind her ear, “I got this, just give me a second…” <em>it was certainly not the time to be clumsy, </em>but she didn’t take more than a minute.</p><p>Hannah gathered the papers back in their folders and she placed them one by one back onto the desk. But then, the last folder left on the floor was a black leather one. She wasn’t intending to read the label on the front, but it still caught her eye. Hannah stopped halfway from handing it back to him as she recognised her name.</p><p><em>What is this? </em>She bit her tongue. Rufus had said he had made a research on her past, but he had said he had found <em>nothing</em>. If they had found <em>nothing, then what is this?</em> Hannah stood up with the folder in her hands. She turned her back on him as she opened it and started reading. She turned the page, <em>her criminal record. </em>The people that she had killed. <em>No. </em>She recognised the names. <em>No. </em>It was all coming back to her.</p><p>She didn’t want to stare on that list. “Hannah?” Rufus’s voice came from behind. Hannah sucked in a deep breath. She didn’t feel like answering him. Hannah just turned the next page. She gasped. It was her father in that picture. He was a Shinra employee. She never knew. She was too little to know back then. Why did Rufus have that information? Was he trying to trick her? Fool her somehow to achieve something?</p><p>Hannah chuckled bitterly. It wouldn’t be the first time she would be fooled. She heard him standing up and approaching her. Hannah still ignored him. She turned the page. An order, signed by President Shinra. An order to have her father murdered.</p><p>And that was where it got hard to breathe. Hannah read that order. She read it again, and again. President Shinra had killed her father. Rufus’s father had killed her own. She felt Rufus’s hand by her shoulder and Hannah flinched away. <em>No. </em>Her father’s death was the beginning of her <em>bad luck. </em>Her father’s death was what made their mother a Mako-addict. It was her father’s death that had both her and Reno thrown in the streets of Wall Market.</p><p><em>Wall Market. </em>Where it <em>all</em> happened. Where she lost her <em>dignity</em>, her <em>pride</em>, <em>herself</em>. Rufus made a step forward and Hannah took a step back as she turned to look at him. She snapped the folder closed and then it fell off her hand, and she didn’t care. She looked up at Rufus. He had a look in his eyes that she hadn’t seen before. <em>Was he scared? No. </em>She was making excuses for him. This man was never scared. She just looked up at him, sucking deep breaths, <em>trying to breathe</em>.</p><p>Rufus noticed she didn’t want him to approach her. He stayed back. But still, his hands reached for her cautiously and she took another step back. “Hannah-”</p><p>“Do you wish to know what those names in that list are?” Hannah sucked another deep breath. “<em>Clients</em>. Clients that I <em>pleased </em>with my <em>services</em> in Honeybee…” Her hands shook. Her vision got blurry. She didn’t want to cry. She didn’t want to have him see her crying even though he already had seen her before. She didn’t want his arms around her. She didn’t need his pity nor his sympathy. “…did you think I had a choice? I had to raise my little brother. I had to do anything to pay for his tuition because who else would? Hmm? My father?” Her voice cracked when she said that last word.</p><p>All those years, she never got the time to cry for her father’s death. She never got the time to cry for her mother’s death either. Both she and her brother were thrown in the streets, too young, alone trying to survive somehow. She never mourned for her parents, but it was all coming to her <em>now. </em>All those years that she had spent crying herself to sleep because of what she had been through and what she had done. She remembered making the first murder and then crying on top of the body because she had never killed before.</p><p>But it was all now because of <em>him. </em>The father of the man who now stood before her. She couldn’t believe she had fallen in love with <em>Rufus </em><em>Shinra</em><em>. </em>She couldn’t believe she wanted him to hug her. <em>No. No. </em>She shouldn’t.</p><p>It was getting harder and harder to breathe. She needed her inhaler. She needed something, <em>anything</em>. But she only got Rufus’s hands around her, pressing her against him and she buried her face in his chest. No matter how much she <em>needed</em> this, it felt <em>wrong</em>. It felt so wrong <em>needing </em>this man so much. She let her tears fall and she wept against his chest, and it was getting easier to breathe now.</p><p>His hand caressed her back. “I’m so sorry… just breathe, Hannah…” And she did breathe, and the panic was almost gone, but then came another feeling. <em>Sorrow. </em>She couldn’t stay there. She couldn’t stay there and keep falling for this man. She needed to <em>leave</em>. She needed to get out of there. Probably her silent apartment and the pillows of her bed would be a better place to cry on than the shoulder of this man.</p><p>“No…” Hannah pressed her hands against his chest and pushed them apart. She did not want to be there. She needed to be left alone, and cry in some dark corner of some room till her eyes would feel empty. “…I leave tomorrow morning. I thank you for our deal, but I wish to break it-”</p><p>“Hannah, you’re not thinking clearly-”</p><p>“No,” She couldn’t let this man <em>save </em>her company.</p><p>It was wrong. It felt wrong siding with the company that took her father away. No matter how much it hurt, she pushed him away. It hurt knowing that she had to leave. It hurt that she had to do it willingly. She had given herself to so many people, <em>but the son of the man who had taken her father?</em> She was going to lose her company, but she didn’t care. How much more could be taken from her? <em>What more can I lose? </em>Hannah gritted her teeth. Another tear slipped down her cheek.</p><p>“No, I don’t want your coal! Keep it! I’ve lost enough of my dignity already! I shan’t allow myself to fall for the son of the man who has ruined my life,”   </p><p>And these were the last words that she spoke to him. Hannah rushed out of the room with her hands covering her face, sobbing against them, and Rufus was left there, staring at the blank spot where she previously stood. His eyes briefly closed and his hand found his forehead. <em>There it was. </em>The <em>destruction </em>that he awaited.</p><p>He couldn’t go after her. She would reject whatever consolation he would offer, and he wouldn’t blame her. He hated to watch her cry. He hated trying to hug her and having her pushing him away. Rufus just sat down on his chair and buried his face in his hands. He was indeed going to deal with <em>every single</em> mistake that his father had made, <em>wasn’t he?</em></p><p>Now he knew that tomorrow he’d return from work, and no one would be playing that piano. He would pass out by his office at night, and no one would come to wake him and try to convince him to go to bed.</p><p>He should have never gotten attached to her. She would inevitably leave him one way or another. Rufus chuckled bitterly to himself. He was a fool. <em>An utter fool</em>. He would forget her.</p><p>At least he would try.</p><p>But he hated knowing that she was probably in her room now, sitting by the floor. Her body shaking from the sobs. Her face buried in her hands. Her legs tucked against her chest. He hated that he couldn’t be there with her. He hated that she <em>didn’t want</em> him to be.</p><p>How can somebody have <em>everything</em> and absolutely <em>nothing</em> at the same time? <em>That’s what emotions do</em>. That’s why he never wanted them. How <em>dare he </em>let things go out of hand? He wouldn’t be seeing her again. He just had to <em>suck it up. </em>She wasn’t <em>his.</em></p><p>
  <em>She wasn’t. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>No one was.</em>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0018"><h2>18. damn you, self, for giving your fucking life, for the sake of others</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><strong>SHE HAD</strong> lost it all. She had lost her company. She had lost her apartment, her car, her job. Her employees had lost their jobs, her clients had all moved to Shinra’s services.</p><p><em>Yeah. </em>There have been a couple of hard months. She did have a job, though. With a little bit of <em>effort, </em>she was accepted in a clinic in Sector 4 where she worked as an Endocrinologist, and could at least pay the rent for a small apartment in the slums of Sector 4. But her current state didn’t really matter as much as the state of the Planet.</p><p>Everybody would stop what they were doing and stare at the nearest TV to watch the news. <em>The world was going to end</em>, they said. There was no hope and everybody was panicking. Some people refused to leave their houses, their families. They preferred getting fired from their jobs and just spend the last few days with the people that they cared about the most.</p><p><em>Alas</em>, Hannah had no such affiliations. So, she kept going to work, taking the train every morning to the upper levels of Sector 4. Reno had called her a couple of times and she did not pick up. As much as she loved her brother, she just wanted to be left alone. He was still working for the company that had crushed her own.</p><p>But the Planet was a mess, and that wasn’t helping with her current state. A threat had awakened in Knowlespole, triggering the awakening of Weapons. They were unleashed and spread havoc across the globe. Meteor was coming. The day of the impact was getting closer and closer by the hour. It was only a matter of time <em>now. </em>Everybody said that. Everybody waited for death. She too waited for death. <em>No. </em>She <em>anticipated it. Impatiently. </em></p><p>Everybody heard of the Weapon attack in Junon. It was said the President of the Shinra Corporation was there too. They had shot it down with the ‘Sister Ray’ canon. All wounded SOLDIER troops were brought back to the Shinra Tower along with the Sister Ray cannon.</p><p>Hannah didn’t really care about how they were going to use the Sister Ray, but the wounded were so many, that Shinra had summoned all doctors -of any specialisation, of any Sector- to the Shinra Tower, to help take care of the wounded. She was one of them.</p><p><em>So many wounded. </em>Cries of pain and despair. What was once a magnificent building, <em>now </em>it couldn’t even house all these people. The hospitals were full. The losses were many. Wounded soldiers were sitting on the floors. The doctors checked them out one by one.</p><p>It was night when it happened.</p><p>The Sister Ray fired, and everybody cheered because it had brought down the walls of that threat in Knowlespole. But then alarms resounded. Then, people started screaming and panicking and running around the place trying to find a way out. Hannah had just finished treating a soldier who had lost his leg. She looked all around the fifty-fourth floor only to see people rushing downstairs from the emergency staircase and the elevator.</p><p>She saw doctors abandoning their patients, to run for their lives. The ones who couldn’t walk, they crawled, and a voice shouted from the speakers.</p><p>
  <em>“Impact imminent! Evacuate immediately!” </em>
</p><p>Hannah acted fast. No matter whatever her patient asked her, she helped him stand, passing his hand around her shoulders, taking him towards the stairs. She placed his hand on the metallic banister of the staircase before she rushed back inside and reached for the other patients. The entire building shook.</p><p>The lights went out. The creaking sound of metal reached their ears and people shouted in panic. Something had hit the building. The only lights were the ones that came from outside. The entire building slightly <em>bent</em>. Hannah’s hands reached for the closest bench to keep herself balanced.</p><p>Whatever object, that balanced on wheels, rolled towards the wall on the other side of the building. Hannah let go of the bench and she made her way towards the other patients who were limply trying to reach the emergency staircase. She was the only doctor left. She cursed mentally. She was the only doctor who actually cared about other people’s lives more than she cared about her own. Or maybe she was just an <em>idiot </em>for staying in an unstable building.</p><p><em>No. </em>She wasn’t going to leave people behind. She had sworn an oath when she became a doctor. An oath that she was going to protect and save lives <em>no matter the cost</em>. After murdering so many people, she had sworn to <em>herself,</em> <em>never to kill again</em>. If she left that building, she would kill the people that she could save.</p><p>When she finished helping them all by the staircase, something hit the building again, and the entire building further bent to the side. Hannah fell back. Her back hit the floor. Bricks and cement from the ceiling fell on top of her. Hannah rolled out of the way. It wasn’t easy to move in her lab-coat, but she stood back on her feet, trying her best to keep her balance as she watched the ceiling crashing down. It blocked her way towards the emergency staircase.</p><p>The Sister Ray fired again and the sound that followed afterwards, were explosions and screams. It was the sound of buildings crushing against each other. The windows of the Shinra Tower broke one by one. The glass shattered on the floor. She couldn’t tell whether it was because of Meteor which was closer than ever. <em>No. </em>It was probably because of the Sister Ray that used the entire City’s energy. <em>That was probably it.</em> Midgar was going to collapse, <em>wasn’t it? What were they thinking firing that canon again?! </em></p><p>Hannah looked at the block of cement and metal and bricks that was blocking her way towards the emergency staircase. She looked at the stairs. They were ruined by debris. The elevator was in the ground floor. She checked if it was working. It wasn’t. It had no power.</p><p>She looked around her in the dark fifty-fourth floor. There was no way out. Whatever had hit the building, it had hit the upper floors. The <em>seventieth </em>floor. <em>The Presidential Suite</em>. Hannah gritted her teeth as she made a step back. Her back met the wall and her hand reached for her mouth as she gasped when the realisation hit her.</p><p><em>No. Rufus. He couldn’t be-</em> <em>No. </em>She was there. She would find him. And if she would, she would help him out. She couldn’t leave him there. She wouldn’t leave this building without him, no matter how many times she tried to convince herself to hate this man, <em>she couldn’t. </em>She just couldn’t.</p><p>It was as simple as that.</p><p>She did acknowledge the possibility that he had probably walked out. That he probably wasn’t even there when the building was hit, but then something caught her attention. The air-vents. <em>A way out. </em>Hannah didn’t think twice. She climbed onto a bench and she pulled herself up into the air-vent after pulling off the metallic cover. It was a bad idea to wander around the air-vents of an unstable building. But it was the only one she had.</p><p>Her lithe body fitted perfectly into the small passageway. She couldn’t tell how long she wandered around. Hannah wasn’t scared. She wasn’t scared of dying -so long as she was doing it willingly.</p><p>Then something caught her eye. It was a writing in the metallic wall of the air-vents.</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>L</em>
  </strong>
</p><p><em>‘L’? What does that mean? </em>Hannah did not ponder on it. She heard something. She heard… <em>laughter? </em>The sound was coming from somewhere beneath her. She followed the <em>‘L’</em>, and the more she did, the louder the laughter got. Hannah saw light coming from beneath a small window. She looked down and she saw a white floor and nothing more. But there was still that laughter and she could have sworn it was coming from beneath.</p><p>Hannah pushed the metallic cover aside and she jumped into the room that surprisingly had lights. It must have been using auxiliary power. She looked around her and she gasped when she saw him. It was Rufus. He was wounded. Blood was slipping out of his lips. His face, beaten and swollen. He was lying on the floor. A hand was clutching on his leg. He must have broken it.</p><p>Hannah immediately hurried towards him. She knelt beside him and her hands reached immediately for his face. He was the one laughing. He must have been having hallucinations but his head didn’t seem beaten enough to cause hallucinations.</p><p>Her fingers found his cheek as she looked in his eyes. He was conscious. He stopped laughing when he saw her. What was she doing there? <em>She shouldn’t be here. She wasn’t safe here</em>. She shouldn’t be in Midgar at all. Why didn’t she just leave when the order was given to evacuate? <em>Alas</em>, she had stayed back for him, and she had found him.</p><p>He never thought he would see her again. A wave of relief washed over him, but then worry kicked in. <em>She shouldn’t be here. </em>She shouldn’t have seen him in the pitiful state that he was in. <em>Beaten</em> and <em>bruised</em> and <em>defeated</em>. The President of the Shinra Corporation hiding away in some remote panic room like a coward. He would prefer people thinking he was dead than knowing he had ended up like this.</p><p>She was in a lab-coat. He knew she was a doctor, but he had never seen her in one. Her glasses were in the pocket of her lab-coat, along with an ID card that was pinned on it. Her lab-coat seemed dusted. Her hair was tightly picked back. She wore a grey shirt and a black skirt. <em>Perfect </em>she was.</p><p>“You came back,” His voice came and he hadn’t realised she had unbuttoned his shirt, taking a look at whatever hurt <em>so damn much</em> in his belly.</p><p><em>Why did he say that? Did he really think that she would leave him?</em> He probably did. She was the one who had left him in the first place. Hannah felt guilt for leaving him that day. And then she gasped and gritted her teeth, and her vision got blurry when she saw a chunk of metal stabbed in his belly. He was losing blood.</p><p>“What is your blood type?” Hannah asked as she hurried over the shelves of a nearby counter and she searched hastily for a blood administration set.</p><p>There must have been one somewhere between the deteriorated medications that were stored in those old shelves. It all seemed so old as if they were placed there years ago and they were left abandoned. Hannah found what she was looking for and she knelt beside him again. He hadn’t answered yet. He was staring blankly at the white ceiling, putting up with the pain on all areas of his body.</p><p>“Rufus, what is your blood type?!” Hannah asked again alarmingly as she pulled up her sleeve.</p><p>Rufus pursed his lips. <em>No. </em>He did not want her to give him her blood. He did not want her to risk her life for him. He hated that he was weak and unable to do anything but risk the life of the woman that he- <em>No. </em>He didn’t want to answer. “You need to… leave. You need to… get out of here,”</p><p>Hannah punched a hand on the floor frustratingly. “I’m not leaving you, dammit!” Her hands found his face. She cupped his cheeks making sure she had his attention. Their eyes met. “If you won’t let me help you, you’ll die, and I can’t let you die, alright?!” She couldn’t let him die. She knew why, and she hated <em>why </em>but she couldn’t, and he didn’t seem to want to give a response any time soon. “Please…” Hannah begged. She gritted her teeth and shut her eyes trying to keep the tears back, but a tear slipped down her cheek anyway. For once again, she was <em>terrified</em>. She couldn’t lose this man. Not like she had lost everyone else in her life. “…please let me help you, I can’t lose you, I love you, Rufus… please,”</p><p>She couldn’t believe she had said that. But another tear slipped down her cheek and landed on his own. He stared up at her and she could have sworn, a smile had started forming on his lips. No matter the pain, he felt <em>relief</em>. He didn’t know what to say and how to feel. He just knew he was smiling. She <em>loved </em>him. After all those months of thinking that she <em>despised</em> him… she <em>loved </em>him. He had to set aside his ego and accept her help and be with her.</p><p>“A positive,”</p><p>She nodded and she let out a heavy sigh of relief. She stabbed the needle in her veins and drew her blood in the plastic bottle before she administered it in him. Hannah felt exhausted, but she was relieved. She slowly pulled out the small chunk of metal and casted a healing Materia that she had found on the shelves. The wound slowly closed and the bleeding stopped.</p><p>Hannah let out another sigh and she buttoned his shirt again. He was going to live. <em>He’s going to be okay. </em>Rufus tried to lift himself up with his hands but he winced and collapsed back down. “Stay down. You need rest,” Hannah crawled behind him and settled his back against her chest. His head rolled back on the shoulder as he shut his eyes and focused on enduring the pain. Hannah passed her hands around him and held him close. She pressed her lips on his forehead searching for fever but he had none, <em>thank goodness</em>.</p><p>Rufus’s eyes looked up at her. His hand found hers and he laced their fingers together. She had just saved his life. He never thought there would be someone out there willing to do that for him. At least, someone he wasn’t paying. He never thought anybody would ever hold him like that. She looked pale as she forced a smile down at him and her fingers gave his a gentle squeeze.</p><p>“You shouldn’t have done that,”</p><p>Hannah shook her head. “Aw shut up,” she chuckled. His hand reached for her cheeks, wiping away whatever wet traces were left by her tears. She leaned her face against his hand and she supported it on her cheek with her own.  </p><p>Usually, he would feel annoyed about having somebody telling him that. But <em>right now, </em>he didn’t. His smile just slightly widened, before it faded again. “We need to get out of here,”</p><p>“We will wait for-”</p><p>“It’s not safe for you to be here-”</p><p>“Rufus, I’m staying with you,” Hannah insisted but she did not calculate the meaning of her words. She just laced their fingers together and pulled his hand down. She couldn’t imagine what he had been through all these months dealing with the Weapons, with Sephiroth, with AVALANCHE, with Meteor. She should have never left him. She had just added to his troubles and she felt guilt spreading beneath her chest like a wildfire. Hannah rested her cheek on top of his forehead and she sighed there, closing her eyes. “I should have never left you,” she admitted in regret.</p><p>Rufus just closed his eyes and sighed in relief. He was exposed in his current state, but -for once- he didn’t care to have her watch him being like this. He just tried to relish in the moment no matter how close to death he had been a few seconds ago. She held him there, like that, close and warm and welcoming. He never realised how much he had missed this. He never realised how much he needed this.  </p><p>The world was ending. They were going to die <em>tonight</em> or <em>tomorrow</em>. But it didn’t matter so much <em>now. </em>She was there, <em>with him. </em>Maybe they were closest to death than ever, but they were together at least. <em>Let Meteor come. </em>He didn’t care <em>now</em>. Not as much as he did when she <em>wasn’t</em> there. Not as much as he did when he knew he was going to die without getting the chance to see her again. He had everything, and he had nothing without her. It was strange to think about how much of an emotional wreck <em>love</em> makes of people. But now it was strange. He had a broken leg, broken ribs, a headache, he was <em>loved</em> but he was anything but an <em>emotional wreck. </em> </p><p>“I love you too, Hannah,”</p><p>He didn’t know the consequences of speaking that out, but he didn’t care. The world was ending. He wasn’t going to get another chance. Once his Turks would find him, he wasn’t sure whether they’d stay together or whether they’d be parted again till <em>the end of the world. </em>But he had the time <em>now</em>. He had his chance to tell her. The only chance he’d ever get. He’d be damned if he didn’t grasp it. He’d be damned if he’d let her die without telling her that he felt that very same <em>treacherous feeling</em>.</p><p>“I do,” He had to repeat it though. The look on her face didn’t look like one that told him she believed him. His own fingers gave hers a gentle squeeze and he looked up at her. <em>Now </em>she looked surprised. She looked <em>happy. </em>Surprised and caught off guard, but <em>happy. </em>Her smile returned. The smile that made him fall for her in the first place. It returned, and it made his heart flutter and for once, he didn’t feel like scolding himself for being <em>such an idiot</em> and saying the <em>three words </em>that he never thought he would say.</p><p>And then she leaned in and pressed her lips against his own. His lips responded immediately, and his hand found her cheek. Their eyes closed. It was just one small moment. A very small, but a -so, very- <em>precious </em>moment. She never thought he would ever tell her this. She never thought she’d get to be loved back. It was so foreign to her. <em>Is that how it feels to be loved? </em></p><p>She pulled back and their eyes met briefly. He looked tired. She should let him rest. Hannah buried her face in his hair, leaning close to him, and they both closed their eyes and cherished each other’s company for as long as they had left.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0019"><h2>19. damn you, self, for giving your fucking life, for the sake of his</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><strong>HE WAS SLEEPING</strong> when she opened her eyes and looked down at him. She pressed a finger on the pulse of his wrist, <em>making sure he was alive. </em>He was. He was <em>okay. </em>Hannah’s lips curled into a smile as she looked down at him. He was sleeping peacefully in her lap. His head rested on top of her forearm. The painkillers had barely worked on diminishing the pain in his broken leg and ribs. He must have been very exhausted to be able and sleep through that pain.</p><p>But he was <em>okay. </em>He was there with her <em>now, </em>and she didn’t think about what was to come. Meteor must have been shaking the entire City already. The Turks were either going to find them or leave them there. She wasn’t sure and she could tell Rufus wasn’t sure either. But none of both seemed to <em>care the least </em>about being found.</p><p>All she cared about <em>now</em> was that he had told her he <em>loved </em>her. <em>Oh Gaia, </em>maybe she wasn’t the only <em>lovestruck fool</em> in the room after all. She was glad, though. She was more than glad. She was <em>happy</em> and she didn’t care if she would die <em>now</em> or later. She was holding him. She had been supporting his head on her forearm. His face, slightly buried in her shirt. Hannah pushed a few strands of hair away from his forehead and he started stirring slowly.</p><p>He opened his eyes and looked up at her. He felt her lips pressing a warm kiss on his forehead and he closed his eyes again, relishing in it. “How’re you feeling?” Hannah asked as she pulled back to look down at him. Her hand found his face and cupped his cheek.</p><p>He did have a broken leg and a few broken ribs. The taste of blood was still in his mouth and his head ached, but he couldn’t feel all these for a moment. It was easier to ignore them now that she was there. “I’m better,”</p><p>He did notice no one was there. No one had found them yet and Meteor was right above them. Midgar must’ve been getting destroyed. The emergency helicopters and vehicles and soldiers must have all left with the refugees. With the people that they had saved. Midgar must have been evacuated and it was just the two of them <em>now</em>, closest to Meteor. They would be the first to die.</p><p>And then, he just didn’t want this to happen. For once in his life, he didn’t want to let go of it. <em>His life</em>. The building shook, the lights flickered. Hannah’s hands tightened around him, and his own fingers squeezed around her own. Hannah pressed her forehead against his and they both closed their eyes. The end was near. It was nearer than ever. Meteor was there. And these were just two people clutching onto each other, waiting for the end of the world.</p><p>She wished they had more time. She wanted to spend more time with him. He too wanted to do <em>so much with her. Heck, </em>maybe even settle down. Something he never thought he would do. Something he never thought was worth trying. Something she too never thought she would do.</p><p>“Is… no one going to find us?” Hannah asked shakily. She shut her eyes and buried her face in his neck. His fingers found her hair, caressing softly. She never knew it would end this way. She could’ve never imagined that she would never get the <em>time. </em>The <em>chance </em>to spend a beautiful future <em>with someone.</em> A tear of her own fell on his shirt. She tried to stop. She didn’t want to die <em>crying. </em></p><p>He pressed a kiss on her temple and his hand tightened around her. He hated himself because he was too weak. She was only there because of him. She could have easily slipped through the vents and leave this building, but she had stayed. She had insisted that she would stay with him and he was both grateful and <em>terrified</em> and <em>guilty</em>. He shouldn’t have let her <em>stay. He shouldn’t have</em>.</p><p>But they were going to die anyway.</p><p><em>Where are the Turks? </em>He thought -for once in his life- <em>desperate</em>. He knew they were loyal to him, but he wouldn’t be surprised if they had abandoned him. He hadn’t treated them any better. “I’m sorry, Hannah,” It was only a few times in his life that he had apologised.</p><p>“Boss!”</p><p>A familiar voice came from the other side of the white door. Rufus chuckled. He let his head rest back on her forearm as relief washed over him once more. He hadn’t doomed her after all. Hannah looked up in surprise. She recognised the voice.</p><p>“Reno?!”</p><p>“Sis?!” Reno’s hands reached for his hair, pushing back another strand that fell messily on his forehead. “Rude!” He motioned to his partner before the two of them kicked down the door only to rush in and find the President half-passed out and Hannah holding him.</p><p>“Boss! Sis! What the fuck are you doing here?!” Reno scoffed as he knelt down passing Rufus’s hand around his shoulders.</p><p>“Saving your boss, that’s what! Quit asking! He needs to get into a hospital, fast!” Hannah said and Reno nodded to his partner before he rushed out of the building. Hannah passed Rufus’s other hand around her shoulders. The two siblings grunted as they lifted him up and started dragging him out of the building.</p><p>When they finally reached the reception and walked out, Hannah couldn’t help looking all around her. If she didn’t know better, she wouldn’t recognise Midgar. It was… <em>on fire</em>. Flames spread all around the buildings and consumed everything. One building was crashing after the other. The streets were devoid of life. There was a firestorm above them. There was the loud thudding of clouds crashing against each other and fire erupting from above. Meteor was right above them. It was an inferno. It was <em>hell. </em></p><p>Reno’s voice snapped her out of it and she focused on taking Rufus out of there. He couldn’t walk. He winced and hissed, and gritted his teeth in every single step that he made.</p><p>Rude led them towards a helicopter. The only one left. The pilots were dead on top of the controls, and the people who had boarded were panicking because no one knew how to fly it. Reno and Hannah lied Rufus on the floor of the helicopter. All seats were taken. Filled with wounded people and crying children.</p><p>Rufus lied down with a loud wince. Reno and Rude hurried over to the cockpit and switched on the engine. Reno tried to lift the helicopter up, but it crashed back down on the cracked pavement of the destructed street.</p><p>“No, no, no, no, no! Don’t do this to me!” Reno growled as he pressed the same buttons again and he grabbed the handle and tried to lift the helicopter back up. It crashed down again and he cursed a couple of times before he tried once more.</p><p>Rude shook his head as he looked back at the people. “Too much weight,”</p><p>“We aren’t leaving anybody behind, dammit! Ya hear me?!” Reno growled at his partner, shooting him a glare. <em>No. </em>They had already taken so many lives. They had already burdened their shoulders with enough guilt. He was going to get that helicopter in the air and take those people out of there.</p><p>Hannah looked down as Rufus’s hand reached for beneath his jacket. He drew out a gun. A gun with Shinra’s sign on top. He caught her wrist and handed it to her. Hannah looked at the slide. <em>One bullet only</em>. <em>Of course. </em>She chuckled bitterly.  </p><p>She knew what he meant. She knew exactly what he was asking her to do. It hurt. <em>Oh, Gaia- </em>it hurt so much. She felt a lump forming in her throat, threatening to choke her. Her eyes stung. Tears were ready to start rolling down her cheeks. But her fingers tightened around the gun. The world <em>needed </em>Rufus but it <em>did not need</em> her. She looked at the seats. Crying, wounded children clutching on whoever they had left. <em>But she</em>… she had <em>nothing</em> left. <em>No one</em>. Except for maybe the man who was <em>now</em> handing her the gun. A gun with only one bullet and only one life to take. <em>Her own. </em></p><p>
  <em>“Tell me, Hannah, if you could choose between burning alive and planting a bullet to your head, what kind of death would you choose?”  </em>
</p><p><em>Yeah. </em>She knew exactly what his eyes said as they stared up at her. His fingers clenched around her hand. Both their hands tightened around the grip of the gun. <em>Did he really care for her at all?</em> Would he ask her to do this if he did? Hannah had already decided to get off that helicopter before he had given the idea. She had already decided it because she wanted to save <em>him</em>. She wanted Rufus and her brother and the rest of those people to leave, and if she could get them the chance to leave, then she would.</p><p>She had stayed back for him in the first place. She would gladly lay down her life for his, but she never thought he would <em>ask </em>that of her. <em>Handing her a gun? </em>It just let her know that he was approving of the decision to lay down her life. That he was approving of <em>letting her die</em>. And this thought just <em>hurt so much</em> to know. Maybe he did not love her after all. Maybe he had just said that so that she could take that gun <em>now</em> and grant him the chance to live.</p><p>What a fool had she become? What a fool <em>am I to think he could love me? To think that he cares? An utter fool</em> and she was disappointed in herself for not seeing that sooner. <em>Once again, </em>she was fooled and hurt and cast aside. Always, <em>cast aside. </em>She shouldn’t be surprised. Their own mother had cast them aside. She shouldn’t even have <em>hoped </em>for something <em>better</em>. She shouldn’t have even <em>hoped </em>for <em>love. Love. </em>A treacherous, <em>treacherous </em>feeling. <em>Useless. Utterly useless. </em></p><p>Hannah tore her hand away and her gaze away from his. It was the last time she would stare at him. It was the last time she would hold his hand. It shouldn’t be saddening her. He never really loved her. She listened to Reno cursing. Hannah chuckled bitterly as she gripped the gun and she stood up. She looked down at it.</p><p>“It’s alright, little brother…” Her vision blurred. He couldn’t hear her. He was in the cockpit pressing buttons and turning levers and trying to take-off. “…it’s alright,”</p><p>And then he had to watch her do it. He had to watch her jump off that helicopter. Rufus had to watch her <em>leave</em> with the gun that he had given her, and once she had jumped off, the helicopter took off, but not once did he take his eyes off of her. That’s not what he had in mind. <em>No. </em>He wanted to plant that bullet to his own head. But he had to<em> watch </em>her <em>leave, didn’t he? </em>He had to<em> watch her die. </em>Just like he had <em>watched</em> his mother die. Why did he have to lose the people that he cared about the most? <em>Why?! </em> </p><p>He shouted her name. He shouted it again <em>and again</em> just like he had shouted his mother’s name when those people carried her coffin away. But the helicopter flew away and took him away from her just like those people who had kept him from running to his mother’s grave. Hannah was left there, in the midst of a collapsing city. In the middle of all this fire and this destruction. And he had to watch her.</p><p><em>Why?! Why </em>did it all have to be so <em>unfair?!</em> Why did he have to lose her <em>too?</em> Why did the same pain have to repeat itself <em>all over? </em></p><p>He was so weak. He was so weak just like he was back then and he hated himself. He couldn’t move, he couldn’t speak. His body felt limp. The pain on his leg, and the pain on his ribs, and his blood that flooded his mouth. Rufus’s body rested back down on the metallic floor. She was <em>gone, wasn’t she?</em> And he was the one who had <em>doomed her. No. He</em> should be the one down there <em>now. </em>He should be the one in the middle of <em>his own city</em>, to go down with it. It would hurt less than knowing for the rest of his life that that <em>one person </em>that he had fallen for, he himself had brought them to their demise.</p><p>Something hot and slick slipped down his cheek. <em>Tears. </em>He hadn’t cried in so long. He hadn’t cried ever since his mother’s funeral. <em>Now, </em>he was crying for the death of his <em>beloved. </em>A death that <em>he had inevitably brought upon her. </em>He knew he would fail her somehow, but he never thought he would kill her. He could have never prepared himself for that. She should have never told him she loved him because it had given him hope where there was <em>none</em>. It had given him hope for something better. Something he was clearly <em>not </em>destined to have.</p><p><em>No. </em>He was destined to live alone. He was destined to wear that <em>mask </em>of the ruthless, manipulative businessman on his face. He was destined to be the man that everyone would hate and blame. The man that no one would fall for. No one but <em>her</em>. And he had just <em>killed</em> her. The woman that he loved.</p><p>Hannah wept as she stared all around her. The fire spread and reached closer and closer. She wasn’t going to run. She was <em>done </em>running. The heat radiated from the flames and hit her face. The sky was bright. It was a bright orange colour. The colour of fire. Hannah looked up and she saw Meteor. It was coming right at her. But she could not hear it. She could not hear the storm. The thunder that crashed again and again in the sky. She couldn’t feel the earthquakes.</p><p>Hannah looked down at the gun. She was still holding it. It had the Shinra sign on top. Hannah chuckled bitterly. It was <em>funny</em>. She was going to plant a bullet in her head. And that bullet would have been manufactured by the company owned by the very man that she loved.</p><p><em>That</em> <em>stupid</em> she was.</p><p>Hannah stared down at the flames as they approached. <em>Destruction</em>. But it wasn’t <em>destruction </em>that she saw. She saw <em>him. </em>She felt <em>him. </em>She felt his hands around her. She remembered the tightness of his embrace when he’d hold her in the nights to help her sleep. It had almost felt like he cared.</p><p>He had almost fooled her that he loved her. <em>Alas, he didn’t</em>. <em>He never did</em>. And she would have to die knowing that. She wouldn’t be holding that gun if he did. But then she remembered his smile when he told her that he loved her. She remembered that jealous expression on his face when Dark Nation would pay her more attention than she paid him. She remembered the look on his face when he asked her to <em>stay. Oh, Gaia,</em> he had even <em>asked</em> her to stay <em>with him</em>.</p><p>She remembered feeling so <em>hopeful </em>and so <em>ridiculously </em>happy after this. What an idiot she had been? What wouldn’t she give to go back to this moment?</p><p>Hannah looked down at the fire. She looked up at Meteor which was approaching her. She looked at the building that crashed nearby her. She looked at the destruction that spread before her and it was moving closer and closer. This was her <em>end, wasn’t it? </em>This was how her story was going to end. She could either pull the trigger <em>now </em>or wait for a burning death.</p><p>An explosion hit nearby. It was time. She brought the gun up and she pointed it to her temple. She had to admit. It hadn’t all been <em>that </em>bad. She remembered teasing her brother. How he’d frown and scoff and shout at her like a <em>five-year-old. </em>How he’d come to her whenever he needed to talk about something that bothered him and he needed somebody to listen. Whenever he needed her help or her protection when they were little. She remembered hugging him. Two children left alone in the streets. They still had each other.</p><p>She loved her brother. She had been through hell for the sake of his happiness but she would do it all, all over again if she had to. She did hear him shouting her name when she jumped off the helicopter. Reno loved her too. She was his only big sis. She was the only <em>mother figure </em>that he ever had.</p><p>Reno let go of the controls and he rushed over the window, looking down. Seeing her being left there, in the midst of all this chaos. He tried to rush back to the cockpit and take the helicopter down, and take her with him, but Rude didn’t let him. There was no going back now. If he did, he would be risking all those people’s lives including his boss’s and his own and his partner’s.</p><p>Reno kicked the pilot’s seat and Rude’s hand reached for his shoulder. Reno shook his partner’s hand away. He did not need any <em>consolation</em>. He needed to know if his sister was going to survive. Reno caught Rude’s hand and he looked at the dark lenses of his partner’s glasses. His eyes shined with tears as he gritted his teeth.</p><p>“Tell me I didn’t leave her!” Tears slipped down his cheeks, as he gritted his teeth and he shook his head in denial. “Tell me her death is not my fault!” Reno shouted as he thrust a fist on the arm of the pilot’s seat. He hit it so hard, the back of his knuckles turned a dark purple. He didn’t care.</p><p>Rude stood silent. <em>Always, </em>silent. He focused on piloting the helicopter, trying to avoid his partner’s gaze. He shook his head. “I’m sorry, Reno,”</p><p>Reno shook his head and buried his face in his hands. He knew something bad would come out of her deal with his boss, but he never thought she would die. He was prepared to protect her from anything. He could take care of anything that would try to harm her, but <em>this? </em>He couldn’t <em>fight death. </em>He was useless when it came to that. It was far beyond his capabilities.</p><p>He hadn’t convinced her enough. He hadn’t reached out to her like he should. Guilt flooded beneath his chest and his fingers clutched in his hair. First, he lost his parents, <em>now </em>his sister. The only person he could open up to. The only person who had looked after him. Who held him and promised to keep him safe whenever he was afraid.</p><p>She was the only one that he had left and he had <em>failed </em>to protect her.</p><p>The fire reached closer to her <em>now</em>. It surrounded her. Hannah looked up. The helicopter flew far away to safety. Hannah turned her attention back to the fire that reached close. Her finger found the trigger as she pointed the gun to her temple. She had at least tasted how <em>happiness</em> felt like when Rufus told her he loved her, even if it had lasted only a few hours. Even if he didn’t mean it. <em>Of course, he didn’t mean it. </em>She couldn’t understand how in the <em>world </em>she had let herself believe him. <em>Believe in what they had. No. </em>They had <em>nothing</em>.</p><p>Another tear slipped down her cheek. It was time. It was <em>now </em>or never. She looked at the helicopter as it vanished in the distance. She turned her back to the fire. She didn’t want to watch it as it burned her body. Her finger twitched.</p><p><em>Bang. </em>        </p>
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<a name="section0020"><h2>20. damn you, self, for giving up your fucking life, so easily</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><strong>HANNAH HAD</strong> no idea what happened after this. She just knew she never pulled the trigger because something came emerging from the ground. It was a phosphorescent green glow that broke through the soil and stopped it all. She remembered stepping away from it. She couldn’t know the consequences of having it touching her. But it looked like that green glow that <em>escaped </em>people’s bodies when they die. It was the same colour as Mako. It must have been the Lifestream.</p><p>It stopped Meteor, but it destroyed Midgar. The weaker buildings collapsed. Hannah <em>ran.</em> She ran with all the strength that she had. And then there was smoke in the air. Dust and smoke from the buildings that had collapsed and it made it hard to breathe. Hannah coughed and fell to her knees.</p><p>She couldn’t tell what had just happened, but Meteor was no longer in the air, and Midgar wasn’t totally destroyed. The Lifestream disappeared no long after and then she wandered. She wandered through the empty streets of what was once Sector Three. It was all abandoned ruins. A few fires still flickered <em>here and there. </em>The sun had come out. The new day had dawned.</p><p>Hannah tried to pull it together. She didn’t have her inhaler. She couldn’t get an asthmatic shock. <em>Not now. </em>She drew in deep breaths and she tried to focus on breathing. She calmed down. She took a moment. Midgar was empty. <em>Or so she thought. </em></p><p>She heard footsteps and then <em>gunshots. </em>Hannah rolled out of the way avoiding a bullet that came right at her. It crashed on a rubble of cement and metal that had been standing behind her. She landed on her one knee, the other, bent, propping her hand on top. Her lab-coat spread behind on the dark, cracked pavement.</p><p>Five armed men. They seemed wounded, but not too much. She wouldn’t be surprised if they had lost their families after this. “You’re a scientist of Shinra’s, aren’t you?”</p><p>Hannah raised an eyebrow before she realised, she still had that Shinra ID card pinned on her lab-coat. She looked at the gun with Shinra’s sign carved on the metal. That gun still had only one bullet. She couldn’t waste it. She settled the gun between her skirt and the small of her back before she lifted her hands in surrender and she approached the five men.</p><p>“I’m just a doctor. I am no threat,” Hannah said but she could tell she wasn’t convincing them.</p><p>“No, it’s Shinra’s scientists who have brought the world at the sorry state it’s in,” The other man said right before they attacked.</p><p>One held a gun. He fired at her but Hannah jumped out of the way. She kicked him hard in the gut and he coughed. The other tried to punch her. Hannah took a step back. She avoided another punch, bowing before she slipped behind him and punched him hard on his waist, breaking a few ribs. The man with the gun attacked again. He shot at her and Hannah rolled out of the way. The lab-coat was still making moving difficult.</p><p>She side-kicked the man’s head, knocking him on the ground. Hannah grabbed the gun from his hand and she shot the other three that were rushing towards her. Hannah stared at the bodies as they collapsed on the pavement. She knew that the other two would stand up, and should they find her again, they would attack. She couldn’t risk letting them live. She shot the one and she turned to shoot the other one only to find that he had been missing.</p><p>And then she felt something tearing through her back and exiting from her stomach. She looked down only to see the pointy side of the dagger. Hannah gasped as the pain instantly spread all over her stomach. The warm, slick blood slipped out, soaking her shirt and her white lab-coat.</p><p>Her hand gripped on the gun and she turned and shot the man who had stabbed her. <em>No. </em>She wasn’t going to die. She still had a little bit of strength in her left. The gun slipped from hand and crashed on the pavement. Her legs felt weak, though. She tried to take a step forward and she rocked back. She let out a loud wince and her hand reached for the wound on her stomach. It radiated with pain. A gush of blood ran down her skirt and spilled on her shoes.</p><p>Hannah walked. Or at least, she tried, even though it was getting harder and harder to do that. She didn’t know where she was going. Maybe she was looking for <em>help. Yeah. </em>That was probably it. She didn’t know how long she walked. It was getting harder and harder. The pain worsened with every single move. There was no point. She couldn’t find <em>help. </em>She was the only person in the City.</p><p>Her hand reached back. She grabbed the gun that <em>he</em> had given her. A doctor, in the midst of a destructed City, with a gun in her hand. <em>A doctor</em>. She had just taken five lives. She was never meant to be a doctor, <em>wasn’t she?</em> It didn’t matter anymore. The pain was harsh in her stomach. The wound was deep. The blood was hot as it ran out and soaked her clothes. The sun was high and its heat radiated harshly. She felt dazed. It was both the heat and the blood that she was missing. She hadn’t realised her sculp was bleeding as well. A hot, slock drop of blood ran down her temple, and she brought one hand up, touching it. She hadn’t even noticed. It must have been caused when those buildings had been crashing around her. She couldn’t remember. Hannah wanted to pass out. She felt weak.</p><p>She looked around her. She saw nothing but the skeleton of a -once great- City. It had all happened overnight, so fast. Hannah’s fingers gripped the gun as she tried to walk. She made a step and she winced. She made another step and she winced again. She was either going to die beneath a grave of cement and dead bodies or walk out of there. She preferred a painful death in an open valley that a painful death in the midst of the ghost of a cursed City.</p><p>She got the hang of walking. One hand gripped tight around her belly. Her blood covered her hand in crimson as she tried to walk, stretching the wound with every step, every breath, every single movement of her muscles. She was going to die, she knew it. She had survived Meteor, but she wasn’t going to survive this too. Her other hand was tight around the gun that Rufus had given her before… <em>before. </em></p><p>Her feet refused to hold her. Hannah collapsed on her knees with a cry of pain. She panted hard. Exhausted and cold. Another gush of blood ran down her belly. She rested her back against a block of cement and metal that once must have been a part of a building. Her hand clenched around the bleeding wound on her belly. She had left that dagger in, or else, she would die of haemorrhage sooner than she would now.</p><p>Hannah let her head roll back against the cold hard cement wall and she took a moment to close her eyes and rest under the shade of a half building. She knew she still had that one bullet in the gun. She knew <em>why </em>Rufus had given her a gun with just <em>one </em>bullet.</p><p>She remembered the night before. An entire City on fire. An inferno, <em>if you may</em>. Hell was unleashed. She had stared down at it. She had looked right into death’s eyes. She remembered pressing that gun to her temple. One bullet. One life. <em>Her own</em>. Rufus was acting out of mercy. He was probably saving that bullet for himself, but he had given it to her. He had offered her the chance to join the Lifestream and avoid burning to death with the rest of the Planet.</p><p>But things had gone differently, and now she was left bleeding to death in the middle of a ruined City, with nothing but a gun, and only <em>one </em>bullet to use. She didn’t see anyone else around her at the moment. She was the only life she could take.</p><p><em>Rufus. </em>She couldn’t tell where he was. If he was even alive. She scolded herself mentally. She shouldn’t be bothering. He didn’t care for her. But, <em>no, </em>she couldn’t start thinking about this <em>now. </em>She was in pain already.</p><p>She could make it end. She could make the pain end. She could leave that cursed life. She could <em>leave </em>right now and end her suffering because her life had been nothing but that. She had wanted so many times before to point a gun to her temple and pull the trigger. She had tried countless times. One of them was <em>a few hours ago</em> but she was interrupted.</p><p><em>Now</em> she couldn’t be interrupted. She couldn’t protect herself if anybody found her and attacked her. She didn’t want to know the state the world was in. Hannah brought the gun up and she looked at it. It was her <em>death</em>. It was her <em>salvation</em>. It was funny to think of how <em>death could be her</em> <em>salvation</em>. It was funny to think that the man that she loved, had given her a gun with <em>one </em>bullet. It was funny to think that the man that she loved, was being <em>merciful</em> by offering that <em>one </em>bullet for her to take her own life.</p><p><em>Or maybe… </em>it wasn’t funny at all. A tear slipped down her cheek as she pointed that gun to her temple with a trembling hand. She wouldn’t be having the energy to do that again if she waited for more. She had lost much blood. She was going to die whether she pulled the trigger or not.  </p><p>It was time she did it. She didn’t know if Rufus was alive. She didn’t know if he would search for her. But then she reminded herself <em>what</em> he was. This man, no matter her feelings for him, he wasn’t a friend, he wasn’t a lover, he wasn’t her enemy. He was… <em>nothing.</em> He should be <em>nothing </em>to her because she was <em>nothing </em>to him, yet her heart ached so much for him. She had helped him escape and she had stayed back facing the consequences one by one and he didn’t give a <em>damn </em>about her. Or at least, she was going to die knowing that.</p><p>She was <em>dying now. </em>She should better speed things up and get over with it. She knew she would hurt Reno. But Reno was strong. He was strong. <em>He’ll get through it. </em>She loved her brother. She really did. He loved his sister. He really did.</p><p>She was going to die in the exact same way that their parents died. But now, she was the one pointing the gun to her temple. A gun with Shinra’s sign on top. A bullet manufactured by the company owned by the man that she loved. A tear slipped down her cheek. <em>That’s just typical</em>. It was time. <em>It was time</em>. Her finger twitched.</p><p>She never got to pull the trigger though. She heard something. She heard barking. A familiar barking, from a familiar dog<em>. No</em>. It was probably her mind playing tricks on her. She was probably hallucinating from the blood loss. But then that same barking came again and she didn’t pull the trigger. She pulled the gun away and she looked around her. No matter how much blood she had lost, she tried her best to focus and see. She needed to know if her assumptions were correct. She needed to know if that barking came from her dog. </p><p><em>Alfie?</em> It came again and she heard fast pounding on the cemental floor. She looked up and she saw him. Her baby boy rushing towards her. His tongue, trapped between his teeth as he made his way to her side and started smelling her. He was white. He was small, but older <em>now</em>. He was her dog. The dog that her father had given her for her seventh birthday. It all seemed so long ago. How was he still alive?  </p><p>What if he wasn’t her dog? <em>No</em>. He smelled her. It looked like he recognised her. He started licking her wound and she let him. Dog saliva has decontaminating properties. <em>That’s why dogs lick their wounds when they get hurt. </em>She reminded herself. </p><p>The gun fell off her hand and crashed on the cement she had been sitting on. Her hands reached for Alfie and started stroking his head, his back, his face. She couldn’t die <em>now</em>. She couldn’t have Alfie watch her die. <em>And what if she did die? What then?</em> Alfie would stand by her body waiting for her to move while she never would again. </p><p><em>No</em>. She couldn’t allow that. But she couldn’t move. She couldn’t get up and leave. She couldn’t get up and find help. She was still losing blood. She was still dying whether she had pulled the trigger or not. A tear slipped down her cheek. </p><p>“I’m so sorry, Alfie,” </p><p>A sob reached her throat as she weakly caressed him. Alfie rested his face on her lap, on top of his two front feet and he stared up at her quietly. Even though he couldn’t speak, he could tell from the look in his dark eyes that he was sad. Her one hand clenched around her wound, the other, even though it was crimson in blood, he did not back away. He let her caress him. But then she felt weak. Her hand trembled and landed back down on her stomach. </p><p>Hannah’s head rolled back on the metal and she stared down at her beloved little pup. She had missed him. She had missed him so. But she had to leave him.</p><p>But that didn’t keep her tears back. Alfie reached up to her and started licking her tears away from her cheeks. Hannah chuckled as she shakily stroked his back. </p><p>“I’ll have to leave you again, Alfie…” She wept, and at that, Alfie stopped licking and he just looked up at her as if he had understood her. Alfie whimpered as he buried his face on her chest, and she caressed him with whatever strength she had left. “...I’m so sorry…” she rested her hand in his soft fur on his back. Another sob reached her throat “...you’re a good boy…” these were the last words that she remembered saying. </p><p>Her hand landed down on the hard cement. Her head rolled to the side. Alfie stayed put, with his face in her chest. He probably stayed there for a long moment before he realised, her chest was no longer rising and falling steadily. Her hand was no longer caressing his mane. </p><p>Alfie looked up. Her eyes were closed. Her head had rolled over her shoulder. The blood had stopped rushing out of her belly. Alfie barked and howled. He howled loudly again and again. The louder the better. Maybe if she would hear him, she would wake up. She had to wake up. She couldn’t be gone. She couldn’t be. </p><p>It didn’t take long when somebody came.</p><p>◄ ◊ ► ◄ ◊ ► ◉ ◄ ◊ ► ◄ ◊ ►</p><p>“Daddy! She’s awake!”</p><p>It was a child’s voice the next thing that Hannah heard. She felt the ache on her head spreading harshly. She groaned as her hand found her forehead and she rubbed the pain away. She had a bandage tied around her head. She realised she was lying on something soft. <em>A bed</em>. She wasn’t wearing her lab-coat. She was wearing pyjamas that were a little bit bigger than her size, but they were warm and comfortable.</p><p>Hannah opened her eyes only to see a small room. Almost everything in it was wooden. The wooden floor was covered in a thick layer of a dark red carpet. It looked cosy. There was a window, and light pooled in. Hannah looked to the side only to see a little girl in a pink dress with Alfie in her hug.</p><p>She had a wide cute smile on her face. Her hair barely reached her shoulders. “Hello, my name is Marlene. What is your name?” The little girl asked eagerly.</p><p>Hannah panicked for a moment. <em>What happened? </em>She genuinely thought she had died. She still had sticky tears in her eyes and her whole body ached. Her hand reached for the tight bandages around her waist. Hannah winced as the small effort to lift her body and see shocked a radiating pain through her stomach.</p><p>“Tifa said you will be alright. You just need to be patient, she said,” Marlene said optimistically and Hannah looked at the little girl as she petted Alfie. “I had no doubt you’d wake up, though this little guy was worried,” Marlene placed Alfie beside Hannah and Hannah felt a wave of relief washing over her. Alfie started licking her cheek, pressing his paws on her shoulders.</p><p>Hannah laughed. She hadn’t died after all. She didn’t know why she wanted to stay alive. Maybe it was Alfie. She wanted to be there with him. He was old <em>now, </em>but she didn’t care. Her little pup had found her. He had saved her.</p><p>“I’m glad to meet you, Marlene. I’m Hannah,” Hannah said, giving the little girl a smile.</p><p>Marlene nodded. “Beautiful name, Hannah!”</p><p>Then a man walked into the room. He was tall and muscular. Another woman was standing behind him. She was blonde, not older, blue-eyed, and beautiful.</p><p>The tall man laughed. “Glad you’re alive!”</p><p>“How’re you feeling?” The woman asked as she reached Hannah’s side right away and pressed a palm on her forehead, checking for fever. She had none.</p><p>“I’m alright,” Hannah answered and she looked at the woman. No one had checked her forehead like that ever since her mother became a Mako-addict. Hannah remembered doing the exact same motion when her little brother would feel cold.</p><p>A small smile formed on her lips. She didn’t even know those people but they had taken her in their home and they had given her clothes and a bed and treatment. And there was Rufus -a man who knew her- yet he was the one who gave her a gun, <em>asking</em> her to take her own life. Hannah felt bitterness spreading beneath her chest when the memory came back to her.</p><p>“What is it?” The woman asked worriedly.</p><p>“It’s nothing,” Hannah forced a smile. “You found me? Where are we?”</p><p>The woman nodded and the man explained. “Elmyra and my daughter Marlene found you. I brought y’all to Corel, my hometown. Midgar collapsed. Kalm is overflown with refugees,” he sighed. “I’m Barret, by the way. You were in a lab-coat, so I guess you’re a doctor?”</p><p>Hannah nodded.</p><p>“A friend of ours got badly injured last night. Mideel is overflown with refugees, and it’s too far for her to travel. Would you mind to help us?”</p><p>Hannah nodded “Of course, I will. What is her current state?”</p><p>Barret shook his head pursing his lips as he sat beside her on the bed. “She has been stabbed, like you, with a much larger blade. She’s alive, but she has been unconscious ever since,”</p><p>Hannah took a moment to process the information. It would make sense that her organism would try to keep itself asleep as it tried to recover from wounds. “She needs a transfusion. I’m guessing she’s lost lots of blood. One hundred and fifty millilitres should be enough. Give her a few painkillers too. Five hundred milligrams of Morphine will do,”</p><p>Barret nodded as he stood back up. “Alright, uhh…”</p><p>“Hannah,” She said and that’s when the idea popped into her mind. She wasn’t going to give her actual name. It was best if <em>he</em> -considering he was alive- couldn’t find her. “Hannah <em>Scanlon</em>,”</p><p>“Alright,” Elmyra said giving her a smile before she walked across the other side of the bed and she reached for Marlene’s hand. “C’mon, sweetie, we have to let her rest,”</p><p>“Okay!” Marlene turned. Her little hands reached for Alfie. Alfie settled in her hug, and the little girl took Elmyra’s hand and they walked out.</p><p>“Should you need anything, just call out, okay?” Elmyra said and Hannah nodded.</p><p>Once the door was closed and silence fell, Hannah stared at the ceiling blankly. She closed her eyes and she sighed in relief. She never knew she had such <em>luck</em>. She never knew she deserved being found by two wonderful people and being <em>helped </em>like this. Her hands lingered in the bandages around her waist. It hurt, but she could tell it didn’t hurt as much as it should be. And then it all came back to her.</p><p><em>Rufus. </em>The <em>gun. Reno. The chopper. Meteor. The Lifestream. </em>So much had happened in such little time. She remembered when she told him. <em>Gaia, </em>she had given him her blood so that he would survive his injuries. She had told him she loved him and he had told her he loved her too, and for a moment, she was so happy and hopeful. She never remembered herself feeling such happiness before. <em>Yes. Love brings happiness. </em>But <em>now </em>it brought such great sorrow that a tear slipped down her cheek without permission.</p><p>Something caught her eye. Hannah turned at the bedside table, and it was with shiny eyes that she saw the gun standing there. That one bullet was standing beside it. Hannah reached for the bullet and she picked it up and looked at it. She spotted Shinra’s sign on top. She had almost planted that bullet in her head <em>twice</em>, just because he had <em>asked</em> her to. <em>No. </em>She had almost pulled that trigger because she had no other reason <em>not </em>to.</p><p>The man that she loved had <em>asked her to die. </em>That’s why she never wanted to <em>fall</em>. She never wanted this because she knew it would bring more pain. And having more pain added to her life just made her <em>not want it</em> anymore.</p><p>But then Alfie came to her. The little dog that her father had bought her for her birthday a few years before he died. It was so many years ago, but it was as if her father had saved her life even if he was dead. Hannah wept silently. Her hand reached for her mouth, silencing herself down. Her voice slightly cracked and she wished he was there. She wished he could hear her when she whispered.</p><p>“Thank you, dad,”      </p>
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<a name="section0021"><h2>21. Hello, new world, that’s fucking worse than the last one</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><strong>TWO YEARS LATER.</strong> The newbuild City of Edge was said it was built by the scrap scavenged from Midgar. It would be no surprise. That’s why there was the smell of rust in the air, merging with the stench of corpses. <em>Geostigma </em>they called it. A new disease that spread across the globe. Some blamed Shinra. Some others blamed Sephiroth and JENOVA. Some others even blamed the Lifestream, but none was sure. No one knew exactly what it was.</p><p>No one but <em>scientists, </em>that is.</p><p>Hannah had a new ID, a new name, a new life. It wasn’t worse than the last one, nor it was better. She was working on her doctorate in the Shinra University of Edge as a research scientist. She was getting enough money to pay for a small apartment nearby. Shinra had built a City in just a few months after the destruction of Midgar. Hannah wasn’t surprised. <em>So much gil. </em>But she was glad she had made that decision that day to change her name. He hadn’t found her. Both he and her brother thought she was dead.</p><p>The guilt dug a pit in her stomach every time she thought about it. But for once, her life was peaceful. She was not running from anybody. She was not being chased because simply <em>Hannah Sinclair </em>was thought to be dead, and that was it. It was a peaceful life, but it did come with a cost. <em>Regret. Guilt. </em></p><p><em>“It’s easier to erase people than to erase memories,” </em>She remembered telling him. This time, she had <em>erased herself. </em></p><p>Hannah did not think about it. She just <em>worked. </em>She dove into the research on Geostigma at the University and that was it. It kept her busy. It kept her mind off things. Life was better when she just <em>worked. </em></p><p>Hannah was preparing to leave. Another long day had gone by and night had arrived. After gathering, and cleaning up the equipment, she set off to place the tools and the utensils to the series of shelves that spread by the other side of the lab. She took off her lab-coat, hanging it by the coat-stand where countless other lab-coats hung. The rest of the research scientists were gone. It was <strong>7:00PM </strong>and it made sense that everybody would retire for the day. Everybody but <em>one</em>, that is. </p><p>There was still <em>one</em> sitting on the benches of one of the many lab counters that spread throughout the huge room. Another woman, the same as her age and perhaps older. Or at least she <em>looked</em> older. </p><p>Hannah recognised her from her clothes and the identification card that was pinned on her lab-coat. She was one of the Professors of the University’s Life Sciences Department. There was a cane nearby, propped on the counter beside her, while she stared behind the lenses of her glasses on the microscope. She didn’t have a focused expression on her face. On the contrary, she was <em>struggling</em> to stay focused.</p><p>She looked away from the microscope for a moment and took off her glasses. She let them hang by the rope around her neck, whilst her hands reached for her aching forehead, wiping the pain away. </p><p>Hannah approached the familiar woman. The Professor got up, grabbing her cane and she set off to walk towards another counter and grab something. <em>Why was she using a cane?</em> She didn’t look older than 30, yet again, she looked like she had been through a lot. </p><p>The distance between them was long enough so that Hannah couldn’t read her name on her ID card. Hannah felt the curiosity to approach her and ask. She looked familiar. Too familiar.</p><p>Her legs did not hold her up for long, and the cane fell off her hand and she reached immediately for support from the nearby counter. Hannah hurried right away, grabbing the woman’s arm around her shoulders, and helping her stand. </p><p>“Professor!” </p><p>The woman winced as Hannah helped her sit back down on the bench. Maybe there was an issue with her legs -an injury, perhaps- and maybe that’s why she was using a cane. But, <em>no</em>, there was something else wrong with her. She looked tired. <em>No</em>, she looked exhausted, yet she was still there working tirelessly. She had black circles around her eyes as if she hadn’t slept in weeks. Her black hair was a short mess and the stench of alcohol came as she exhaled.</p><p>There were more than a lot of things wrong with that woman. “Thank you, dear,” she said kindly with a choked hiss of pain. Her hand reached for her cane that was lying on the floor. Her other hand reached for her belly, grasping tightly as she bowed down and the movement made her wince once more. </p><p>Hannah pressed a hand on her shoulder and stopped her from further moving. “Allow me,” she said and she bowed down, picking up the cane and settling it beside her. </p><p>The Professor let out a sigh as she ran once again her hand through her forehead. “Thanks again,” she buried her forehead in the palm of her hand and she closed her eyes tiredly. </p><p>Hannah pursed her lips in hesitation. “Excuse my asking, but are you alright, Professor? Maybe you should retire for the day,” </p><p>The woman shook her head “No…” she chuckled bitterly “...no sleep for me. Not anymore at least,” she looked up at Hannah. “Sleep is a luxury you know… yes, it’s a luxury I cannot afford at the moment. Nonetheless, maybe <em>you</em> should go rest. Yes… that’d be good, wouldn’t it?” </p><p>“I was about to leave,” </p><p>“Good, good…” the woman nodded “...but before you do, please, would you fetch for me two radioactive fluorescent dyes?” She asked.</p><p>Hannah nodded and she set off towards the other counter where the fluorescent dyes rested. “Of course,” she fumbled through a large number of small bottles, till she found <sup>32</sup>P and <sup>36</sup>S. She picked up the bottles with the radioactive liquids before she turned and handed them to her. </p><p>“T- Thank you,” the woman said. Hannah sat beside her, not quite sure whether she should leave her there. The Professor didn’t look well. The woman chuckled “So, what is your name?” She turned her attention back on her microscope and she put her glasses back on.</p><p>“Hannah Scanlon,” Hannah answered.</p><p>The Professor chuckled. “Your <em>real </em>name,” she asked again and Hannah’s eyes slightly widened.</p><p><em>How did she…?</em> Hannah sighed “Hannah Sinclair,”</p><p>The Professor hummed. “<em>Sinclair</em> sounds familiar,” she took a moment to think, and then she clicked her fingers as if she had come up with something. “Ah yes! Your brother has been visiting me a lot lately,”</p><p>Hannah raised an eyebrow in curiosity. “Reno?”</p><p>“Yes…” the woman turned and looked at her. “I’m afraid the President is suffering from Geostigma, and they ask for my help, but alas…” she sighed in disappointment “...I have yet to figure this out,” </p><p>Hannah ignored the look that the Professor paid her. <em>The President? Rufus… </em>Rufus had… <em>Geostigma?</em> She felt her heart sinking in her chest and she bit her lip and her hands fisted. <em>No</em>. It couldn’t be. </p><p>“Hannah, but are you a researcher?” </p><p>Hannah snapped out of her thoughts and proceeded to push all emotions aside and answer the question. “Yes,”</p><p>“Occupation?” </p><p>“Endocrinology,” </p><p>“Oh, I see. Well in that case, endocrinologists might prove significantly useful for Geostigma,” </p><p><em>Of course</em>. It struck the glands, and endocrinology was all about the glands. </p><p>“Class?” The woman asked.</p><p>“B1,” Hannah answered and the woman nodded. “What about you, Professor?”</p><p>The woman chuckled and she didn’t answer. Instead, she turned her attention back on the sample, and that’s when Hannah remembered, she had yet to capture the woman’s name. She leaned in and peeked at the identification card that was pinned on the woman’s lab-coat.</p><table>
<tbody>
<tr>
<td>
<p><strong>First/Middle/Last Name:</strong></p>
</td>
<td>
<p><strong>Dr Jocasta H. Ernchester</strong></p>
</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td>
<p><strong>Class:</strong></p>
</td>
<td>
<p>A</p>
</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td>
<p><strong>Occupation(s):</strong></p>
</td>
<td>
<p>Genetic Engineering, Cardiology</p>
</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td>
<p><strong>Born:</strong></p>
</td>
<td>
<p>06/11/1951 - 04/04/1982 (deceased)</p>
</td>
</tr>
</tbody>
</table><p>Hannah’s eyes widened.</p><p>She had a dead woman in front of her.  </p><p>Or at least, <em>everyone thought she was dead. </em></p><p>The woman chuckled bitterly. “My death is still official, even though it never happened,” she looked down on the lenses of her microscope, with that bitter smile on her lips “I asked Shinra to change it but they insist on me being dead. I guess I’ll never find out why. I also asked what that <strong>H.</strong> here is. They didn’t answer that either,” </p><p>Hannah didn’t say anything. She was confused. <em>Utterly confused</em>. <em>How did she not know her middle name? </em>Professor Jocasta <em>Hecate</em> Ernchester. A name that she had read in science-related articles while studying in Midgar’s Sector Five University. But Hannah didn’t speak. She was still shocked as she stared at <em>a ghost</em>. One that everybody thought to be dead. It was even released on the news and the headings of newspapers that her father used to read.  </p><p>
  <em>Shinra’s second in command of R&amp;D, died of ARS.</em>
</p><p>Hannah was too little to understand what ARS was when it happened, but she remembered people talking about it. <em>Acute Radiation Syndrome. </em>An experiment had gone wrong, and she was struck with radiation. Radiation was more than deadly. It caused insufferable injuries that if one was to recover, <em>they’d beg to die</em>. How was she standing there in front of her? She didn’t even look sixty years old while she should be. She didn’t even look burned or cauterised just like radiation should have left her. <em>What happened?</em> </p><p>“I’m sure you have lots of questions,” Jocasta turned and gave her a kind smile. “That’s why I usually try to avoid mentioning my name,” </p><p>Hannah parted her lips to speak, but Jocasta changed the subject. It was clear she didn’t want to talk about herself. </p><p>“The entire world, now, has turned on our heel, begging for a solution. But did you ever wonder what will happen when this problem is solved?” Jocasta asked and Hannah -honestly- had never thought about that. “The scientists and doctors will once again be cast aside. And then the world will turn to entertainment once more…” Jocasta chuckled bitterly “...it is funny to think of how much they’re willing to spend on <em>entertainment</em> and how little they’re willing to spend on their well-being,” </p><p>Hannah nodded in understanding. She knew how much people spent for <em>entertainment</em>. She knew it first-hand. But something didn’t sound right about the way Jocasta had said that. <em>For the record</em>, Hannah couldn’t believe that somebody like Professor Jocasta Hecate Ernchester -she, who was second in Shinra’s R&amp;D command back in the day when women were not allowed to even step into the colossal company’s labs- somebody so talented had yet to figure out a cure for Geostigma. A name that carried so much reputation. Hannah couldn’t believe that she hadn’t already figured it out.</p><p>Geostigma was <em>basically </em>JENOVA cells infesting the human body. The immune system could <em>recognise </em>the cells and thus the body overcompensated trying to fight it. But Jocasta was there when Shinra excavated JENOVA. She was there when groups of scientists were experimenting and <em>trying </em>to figure out what that thing was.</p><p><em>No</em>, Hannah was sure that she had. She was sure that Jocasta knew how to cure Geostigma, and there was something about the JENOVA cells that she had been growing <em>in vitro</em> (=in a test tube). There was something special about them. She recognised the JENOVA cells. Hannah had been working with them all day, every day, <em>for two years</em>. If Jocasta had figured it out, why wouldn’t she let it out and cure all these people? </p><p>“I’ve done, and I’m doing things I’m not proud of,” Jocasta confessed. </p><p>Hannah bit back the questions. This woman looked tormented enough. Hannah got up to leave. <em>Right now</em>, she wasn’t there to bombard that poor woman with questions. But Jocasta did say that endocrinologists particularly may prove useful to treating Geostigma. </p><p>Hannah stood up, and she picked her bag. Before she turned to leave, she turned and gave Jocasta one last look. That ghost was the woman that all women scientists looked up to for generations. Yet she was still standing there, with severe alcohol addiction and insomnia, overworking. Symptoms that all indicated depression and Hannah wouldn’t blame her. In the current situation that the world was in, they were all a little bit depressed.</p><p>“You… decoded and mapped JENOVA’s genome. You were the first woman scientist to have held the second position in Shinra’s R&amp;D command. Nay- you were the only woman that the President had asked himself to join the research on JENOVA,” Hannah said, and despite all these Jocasta let another bitter chuckle and she buried her face in her hands. Hannah couldn’t understand what had gone wrong. </p><p>“These all mean nothing, my dear,” Jocasta breathed shakily “No matter how strong someone may be, when it comes to somebody they love… they...” Jocasta looked up at her “...I’ve… I’ve never been weaker,” she sighed heavily before she put her glasses back on. She needed to <em>work</em>. Work was her salvation. She needed to sink right into it. It was work that always distracted her. It distracted her from <em>life</em>. <em>Pain</em>. It was her way out of the <em>nightmares</em>. Her way out of impending thoughts of <em>him</em>. </p><p>
  <em>Damn you, heart. Why must you make us so weak?</em>
</p><p>Hannah nodded in understanding. </p><p>
  <em>Damn you. </em>
</p><p>Rufus’s life was in danger, and no matter how much she tried to make herself hate this man, she just <em>couldn’t</em>. He was in danger. He was <em>suffering</em>. He was <em>dying</em>. Her heart felt like it was being split in two. She needed to do something. Anything, to save him. </p><p><em>Save him? </em>She had tried this once. She had tried it and things went <em>downhill. </em>Hannah sighed heavily. She couldn’t stand idle. Maybe he didn’t care, but she did. She <em>did </em>care about him and she hated herself for that.</p><p><em>Geostigma has no cure.</em> Hannah felt a tear slipping down her cheek whilst she walked out of the lab and proceeded to exit the building. </p><p>The man that she loved was dying. She needed to be with him. </p><p>
  <em>She needed to.</em>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0022"><h2>22. I meet you, at last, but am I fucking ready for this?</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><strong>ALFIE’S FACE</strong> nuzzled in Hannah’s lap whilst her hand stroked his mane. She was holding her phone in the other hand, fumbling through the contacts till she found her brother’s. She found it hard to press the buttons and <em>call. </em>For all she knew, her brother thought she was dead. Hannah <em>Sinclair </em>never walked out of the rubble. She was left where they had left her, and she had pulled the trigger of the gun that her <em>beloved </em>had handed her.</p><p>Hannah chuckled bitterly and she tossed the phone by the table of her living room. She let her body rest back in the soft pillow of the <em>one </em>couch that fitted in her small apartment, and she focused on petting Alfie. Her brother would be furious if she called and told him <em>you know what? I’m alive. </em>Changing her name had both its perks and its disadvantages, <em>apparently. </em></p><p><em>But… Rufus… </em>Rufus had Geostigma. She needed to see what kind of case he was suffering from. She needed to know if he was suffering a lot or if he wasn’t. She needed to know if he was okay. She needed to know how much time he had left because she just- <em>No. </em>She shouldn’t. Hannah had kept that gun and that bullet. As bitter as it sounded, they were the only things she had left of him and her heart ached for him whilst it <em>shouldn’t. </em></p><p>She should just forget him. Forget it all and move on, and be <em>Hannah Scanlon. </em>She had to be that new person that she had created trying to escape from <em>his sight. </em></p><p>Hannah chuckled again. Her problems sounded so small and <em>nugatory </em>in her mind. The world was in the verge of extinction. Hundreds were dying every single day. She should forget all those <em>stupid problems </em>and focus on the <em>real </em>problem. <em>Geostigma. </em>She had to keep aiding in the research because there must have been <em>some way </em>somebody could cure this thing.</p><p>Hannah sighed as her hand reached for her phone again. She flipped it open and she found her brother’s contact <em>for the fifth time. </em>She finally pressed the buttons and pulled the phone to her ear. She instantly regretted doing that, but there was no turning back <em>now. </em>She sighed heavily, and she dreaded him picking it up.</p><p>
  <em>“Hey, sis,” </em>
</p><p><em>Okay. </em>That was certainly <em>not </em>the response that she expected. She knew she should probably say something else because the two siblings hadn’t spoken to each other ever since that day, <em>but</em> “How do you-”</p><p><em>“You’re not exactly discreet when you walk to Uni every morning. I saw you yesterday and I was fucking blown,” </em>He did not sound pleased. <em>“Why the fuck didn’t you fucking tell me you’re fucking alive!?!” </em></p><p>Hannah raised an eyebrow, cringing slightly as his loud, angry voice hit her eardrum. “Why you think? You work for the guy who crushed my company and my fucking heart! I wanted to disappear, okay?!”</p><p>
  <em>“For fuck’s sakes, Hanney, I fuckin’ buried you. Why didn’t you just let me know?!” </em>
</p><p>He sounded <em>hurt. </em>His voice slightly cracked and Hannah bit her lip. She didn’t want to do this through the phone. She wanted to be there and pull him into a hug because, <em>hell, </em>she hadn’t seen her brother for two <em>whole years. </em>Even before, they would meet every so often but <em>now… </em></p><p>
  <em>“A phone call. A phone call was all that you had to fucking do! Why didn’t you just think of me?!”</em>
</p><p><em>How could he say that? </em>And how could she feel so bad even after everything that she had done for him? She knew she was going to hurt her brother by letting them know she was dead. She knew he’d get mad when he’d find out that she had survived but she just never had the courage to call him and tell him. She was so selfish and she had hurt him, but there hadn’t been a day to go by without thinking of him.</p><p>Ever since their mother was shot in that car, and ever since they were left in the streets, all she did was think of her <em>little brother. </em>She did <em>all kinds of jobs </em>back when she was just a little girl just so that her brother could be taken care of in the Turk Academy that she had to pay. <em>How could he say that? Of course, </em>he didn’t know everything in detail, and she could never tell him. She didn’t <em>want </em>to tell him. She didn’t want to pass on such a guilt to his shoulders.</p><p>“I’ve always thought of you, Reno… every single day ever since mom died…” Her own voice cracked and her eyes stung with tears.</p><p>Reno didn’t answer right away. He took a moment, and she heard him inhaling sharply for a moment and she was sure he was trying not to break down.</p><p>
  <em>“I need to talk to you, I’m coming over,” </em>
</p><p>And he did come. It didn’t take long when she heard a knock and her door and the moment she opened it, he hugged her. Reno’s hands slipped around her and brought her against him and he buried his face in her shoulder. He breathed shakily against her shoulder and both siblings broke down. She was the only person he would allow to see him <em>cry. </em></p><p>She felt Reno’s fingers clutching on her shirt around her waist. Hannah pulled back only to cup his face. Her thumbs found his cheeks, wiping his tears away and pulling those strands of hair away from his face.</p><p>“You’re the only one I have left, don’t you know that?” Reno asked and there was something so <em>heart-breaking </em>about the way he said it. Hannah didn’t know what to say. She knew. They both knew when their parents died, the only ones they could trust were each other, and she had broken that.</p><p>“I… I’m so sorry,” She said letting another tear slip down her cheek and Reno sighed before she let him in her small apartment and she closed the door behind her. She noticed he was holding a folder in his hands. It was that very same folder that she had found on Rufus’s desk right before she had left.</p><p>Reno tossed the folder on her table in her living room. “Says here you’ve killed sixty-five people,” Reno chuckled bitterly “I’ve killed more, I’m not going to judge you, but I thought I fucking knew who you were,”</p><p>“I can’t tell you, Reno,”</p><p>“Why?”</p><p>Hannah sighed. “I’m trying to protect you,”</p><p>“Me? From what?” Reno pointed a finger to himself “I’m no longer that eight-year-old boy that you had to protect, Hannah-”</p><p>“That’s not what I mean-”</p><p>“Then tell me. Stop lying to me and tell me what happened back then!”</p><p>Hannah pursed her lips. <em>How in the world </em>was she supposed to explain that? But maybe it was time that he knew. She had kept things a secret long enough.</p><p>“Please, sit. It’s a long story,”</p><p>Reno took a moment to look at her before he nodded and the two siblings settled on each side of the couch. Hannah drew in a deep, calming breath and she focused her attention on the floor with her hands wrapped around her waist. Reno remained silent. It was so unlike him to stay silent, but he needed an explanation, and if staying silent was going to give it to him, he was going to wait for her to explain.</p><p>“Do you remember Uncle Ben?”</p><p>“Yes,”</p><p>“He’s dead,”</p><p>“I know,”</p><p>“His son killed him in front of me. I was fourteen you were twelve, in your first year in the Turk Academy. So… his son wasn’t alone, I couldn’t fight them when they… they…” she couldn’t say it. Tears were already forming in her eyes before she buried her face in her hands and she sighed.</p><p>Reno stood up and kicked the floor growling angrily “Who were those men?! Do you remember their faces?! Hanney, I swear to Holy I will find them-”</p><p>“It’s alright, Reno. It’s been so long-”</p><p>“No, it’s not alright!” Reno shook his head as he cursed under his breath and walked in circles.</p><p>“It doesn’t matter whether it’s alright or not. It doesn’t change what happened,” Hannah buried her face in her hands and she sighed.</p><p>Reno sat back down beside her. “Well then go on, I have all night,”</p><p>Hannah sighed heavily. “I was sold to Corneo, but I escaped again and I searched for a job in Honeybee. I became a… <em>hooker</em> if you may call it that way,”</p><p>Reno buried his face in his hands and he sighed. “Why, Hanney, why would you-”</p><p>“For you! I had to do anything to make sure you were taken care of in the Academy. I didn’t want you to come back to Wall Market. That place was hell!”</p><p>“Why didn’t you tell me?! I could have been there for you! I’d give it all up and I’d-”</p><p>“I <em>didn’t want you</em> to, Reno. I could provide for you a better life and I did. What kind of sister would I be if I hadn’t?”</p><p>“I never asked you to go through hell for me-”</p><p>“You would’ve done the same for me,”</p><p>Reno growled “That’s irrelevant! And what about that list?! Who are those men?!”</p><p>“Those are my <em>clients, </em>Reno. I killed each and every one of them, and I constructed a plan to kill Corneo as well, but I failed,”</p><p>Reno sighed heavily as he dipped his hands in his pockets “Corneo’s gone. I killed him,”</p><p>“You did?”</p><p>Reno nodded “Boss specifically ordered to kill him in the vilest way that Tseng could think of,”</p><p>Hannah raised an eyebrow “Tseng, specifically?”</p><p>Reno smirked. “Trust me, he suffered,”</p><p>Hannah chuckled. She couldn’t believe Rufus had wasted his <em>precious</em> time give such an order.</p><p>Reno sighed and shook his head. “I can’t believe you never told me,” Hannah placed a hand on his shoulder but still Reno didn’t turn to look at her.</p><p>“I just did what I thought was best. I’m so sorry, Reno. I never meant to hurt you,” Hannah said and that’s when he turned and looked at her.</p><p>“You did not hurt me, you hurt yourself, and it’s…” Reno sighed as he shook his head and sighed heavily “…it’s fuckin’ worse, alright?”</p><p>The anger seemed to slightly fade away. Reno’s smile returned and his hand slipped around her. Hannah smiled at her brother as she buried her face in his shoulder and passed a hand around him. She hadn’t been hugged by someone for <em>two years. </em>She chuckled against her brother’s shoulder and his hand found her hair.</p><p>“But yeah, you did hurt me when I had to watch you jump off that damned chopper,” Reno said against her hair and Hannah’s hands tightened around him.</p><p>“I’m sorry,” She breathed shakily against his neck and blinked a few tears away. She knew she had hurt him, and of all people, her brother did not deserve that.</p><p>Reno groaned. “I told you striking deals with a Shinra ain’t no good!”</p><p>“You were right but-”</p><p>“You didn’t listen to me! Stubborn as ever!”</p><p>Hannah chuckled as she pulled her face up and looked at him playfully. “You’re also right about that. But you love your boss. Admit it,” Hannah raised an eyebrow and Reno grinned.</p><p>He ran a hand through his tired eyes and he pulled his hand from around her. “You do too, and that’s what the fuckin’ problem here is. He legit told you to go kill yourself and ya fuckin’ did it,”</p><p>Hannah chuckled bitterly as she wiped her eyes and settled on top of her one knee. “I’m an idiot. I know,”</p><p>Reno nodded. “That’s one fuckin’ right thing you’ve said today,”</p><p>Hannah chuckled at her brother’s comment and the two siblings stood in silence for a short moment. He was right. <em>She was an idiot. </em>She was an idiot because she had fallen. She had fallen and no matter how much she had tried to <em>forget him </em>and <em>stay away from him </em>she just <em>couldn’t. </em>She had to move on, she tried. She tried so many times but it just <em>didn’t work. </em></p><p>And <em>now </em>he was suffering. He had Geostigma and she needed to know how bad it was. She had to know how much he suffered. She had to know if he <em>needed </em>her there. “Reno… how is he?” Hannah drew in a deep breath shakily.</p><p>Reno sighed and shook his, and let a curse beneath his breath. “I’d be lying if I said he’s fine,”</p><p>Hannah gritted her teeth and she focused her gaze on some random spot in her living room. They couldn’t have survived all those things that had happened only to lose him on Geostigma <em>now</em>. “I know you’ll disagree but I need to see him. I need you to take me to him, Reno, please-”</p><p>“I don’t think he <em>wants </em>to see you. He thinks you’re dead, Hannah. I sure spotted you a few times walking to the University, but I had no intention to tell him,” Reno said and he was probably right.</p><p>It was probably best to <em>stay away. </em>It was probably the best to never get to him because their relationship was just <em>no good. </em>But she hated every single day of her life those two years that had barely passed. She hated returning in an empty apartment every single night. Turning the key, and locking her door, and just have nothing to return to. The neighbours were taking good care of Alfie when she was going to work. But she had nothing to look up to.</p><p>She had nothing but nightmares and an empty apartment. If Alfie wasn’t there with her, she would’ve picked up the phone and dialled her brother sooner than she actually did. And then Alfie barked and the familiar sound made Reno jump up and turn at the source of the sound. His eyes widened. His jaw dropped.</p><p>“No fuckin’ way!”</p><p>Alfie hurried towards him and jumped on his lap and started licking Reno’s face. Reno’s hands reached around their pup and he started stroking his fur and playing with Alfie while he licked his cheek.</p><p>“Old pal!! I thought you were dead!” Reno’s eyes widened as he turned and looked at her. “Where the hell did you find him?!”</p><p>Hannah chuckled as looked at her brother playing with Alfie just like he used to when he was little. “He found me. He saved my life, actually,” Hannah said and Reno turned and looked at her whilst his hands kept stroking Alfie’s back.</p><p>Reno took a long moment to talk and play with Alfie and Hannah couldn’t help but stare. Just the sight of Reno playing with their long-lost pup brought so many memories. Memories that she thought she never had.</p><p>“Oh- Uh… I got, something else I wanna discuss,” Reno said and he chuckled when Alfie started licking his palm. Hannah raised an eyebrow. “So, uh… there’s this… uhh… girl, and she’s… uhh…”</p><p>“You got a girlfriend?!”</p><p>Reno frowned “She’s not my- Hey!”</p><p>Hannah caught Alfie from his hands and settled him on her lap. “My little brother got a girlfriend! I can’t believe it! Are you going to break her heart like all the rest of them?”</p><p>Reno sighed as he buried his face in his hands and groaned. “That’s the problem, she’s not like the rest of them,”</p><p>He sounded desperate. That one must have been a great deal to him. Hannah arched an eyebrow “So… what’s her name?” she asked.</p><p>Reno sighed. “Caroline,”</p><p>“Aww, what a beautiful name! You got to introduce us!”</p><p>“Yeah… that’s another problem. She’ll probably kill me if she sees me again, and mind you, she’s very scary when she gets mad,”</p><p>“Aww…” Hannah whined and she smacked his shoulder “…what did you do?!”</p><p>Reno cringed “I mightta… sorta… possibly have… flirted with another girl?”</p><p>And that’s when he got a <em>beating. Well, </em>he was Turk, she couldn’t beat him a lot, but she did smack and punch hard on his shoulder till he was wincing and whining and folding himself when she added a few kicks on his ribs.</p><p>“You. Fucking. Jerk. You. Don’t. Do. Such. BULLSHIT!”</p><p>“Wait! Wait! Ow! I don’t- I didn’t mean it! I was drunk! I wanna make it up to her!”</p><p>“And how will you do that, you jackass?!” Hannah finally stopped kicking him across of her on the couch and he turned and gave her an apologetic smile.</p><p>“Uh… that’s where you come in??” Hannah shot him a glare and she parted her lips to speak but he cut her. “I’ll take you to your boyfriend-”</p><p>“He’s not my boyfriend-” Hannah tried to correct him but he cut her.</p><p>“…and you will help me deal with my crazy girlfriend,” Reno said and Hannah kept shooting him that glare. He knew what she was saying with that glare. She was probably telling him to <em>man up because he was an adult and he had to deal with his problems himself. </em>And she was probably right <em>but </em>“…please, she’s gonna skin me alive, she’s a boxer,”</p><p>“And you’re a Turk!”</p><p>“I know but I don’t wanna hurt her! I’ve become such a <em>simp</em>, Hannah, I’m such a disgrace-”</p><p>“Alright! Alright, jeez, I’ll help!” Hannah laughed amusingly. She clutched on her stomach and she tried to ease her laughter. She was pretty sure Reno was shooting her a glare, but she couldn’t help it. “Oh dear, she must worth a great deal to you,”</p><p>“She’s my baby!”</p><p>“Alright, alright!”</p><p>Reno grabbed the car keys that he had tossed on the table and he stood up. “Alright, let’s go. I can’t promise he’ll wanna see you,”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0023"><h2>23. what do you mean, when you say you can fucking fix me?</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><strong>Reno took her to Healen Lodge.</strong> Everyone knew that Shinra established there the biggest Medical Centre for treating people with Geostigma and researching for a cure. It had become the President’s very residence and the company’s Headquarters. It was still night when they got there. It was around <strong>11:00PM</strong> and Hannah was sure he was probably asleep.</p><p>She waited outside the room that Reno had vanished in. Her hands were tugging nervously on the leather handle of her bag as she waited outside. The building looked empty as she waited, <em>and waited. </em>She wasn’t expecting to get a positive answer. She just wanted to see him and she’d be on her way. She didn’t want to add to his troubles. She just wanted to be there for him.</p><p>When Reno returned, Hannah stood back on her feet and she waited for whatever her brother had to say. “He’s asleep. I dismissed the nurses so you better take care of his bandages yourself. You’ve treated Geostigma patients before, haven’t you?”</p><p>Hannah nodded. “Of course,” <em>Every single day in the University</em>. “I need to wash my hands first,”</p><p>“No worries, we’ll give you everything you need. You are a doctor, after all,” Reno smirked “you’re more than qualified to be here,” he stopped walking as if he had just recalled something that he had to tell her “The bandages around his waist had been recently changed. You only need to just take care of the arms and legs</p><p>And <em>indeed. </em>Hannah was given a blue nurse outfit and a lab-coat. After thoroughly washing her hands, she put on blue plastic gloves and settled her glasses in the pocket of her lab-coat. She picked her hair back tightly. They couldn’t risk infesting the body with anything else. Geostigma weakened the immune system by 60%. Most people who died of Geostigma, were dying from other diseases that the immune system couldn’t fight because it was weakened by Geostigma.</p><p>Hannah entered the room where Reno said that Rufus was. He was sleeping. He was on a hospital bed. The machinery around him beeped steadily. Everything seemed fine, but he had fresh bandages tied around his waist that covered his stomach and half his body. He had a white sheet covering his body and keeping him warm. His hair was a short mess against his pillow. He was breathing. Cables were attached to his chest keeping track of his heartbeat and blood pressure.</p><p>His hands were covered in bandages. Bandages that had turned black as the dark, damaged, infested tissue had started dissolving beneath. It was <em>bad</em>. Hannah had seen worse, but it was <em>bad. </em>He had another bandage tied around his head covering his left eye. He must’ve lost sight from that one.</p><p>Hannah gritted her teeth and her hands fisted. She felt that familiar sting in her nose reminding her that her eyes were preparing tears. He was <em>bad. </em>She never thought she’d ever see him this way. It had been so long since the last time she had seen him. She had tried to stay away from him but she was only wasting <em>time. </em>She was wasting the time that she could be spending with him. But <em>now </em>he was dying. He was dying and his condition was bad no matter how well he was treated there.</p><p>Hannah approached him hesitantly. She didn’t want to think of what would happen if he woke up. She didn’t want to think of what he would tell her. She had left him again, but after giving her that <em>gun </em>and getting off that helicopter, <em>she had no choice. </em>And she had stayed away and she had hurt him letting him know she was dead. She knelt beside him on the bed and she started untying the bandages around his hand, slowly and carefully not to wake him.</p><p>Her tears blurred her vision, though. She put on her glasses and she replaced his bandages trying her best to silence down herself. She wanted to <em>cry. </em>Curl up in some corner and cry because he was dying. Because her effort back then to help him escape was for nothing. But then she found, it wasn’t her efforts that she cared about. It was <em>him. </em>She was losing him. She was losing him and she had wasted two <em>entire</em> years that she could be spending with him.</p><p>She couldn’t tell whether her <em>death </em>had hurt him, but she hoped it hadn’t. She hoped he was still that <em>heartless man who had handed her the gun. </em>Such man had no possibility of getting hurt. She just hoped she hadn’t hurt him. She had just finished fixing his bandages when she knelt beside him on the bed and she took his hand in hers. His hand was cold and stigmatised, but she didn’t care. She shed her tears on the back of his knuckles and she tried to cry silently.</p><p>For so long she would try to convince herself to move on. To forget him and build a new life, but she had failed. She had inevitably failed because what she had said back then, it wasn’t just because out of panic. She <em>loved this man. She loved Rufus Shinra, </em>no matter what happened afterwards. No matter how she watched those flames approaching and she had nothing from him but a gun to <em>mercy-kill</em> herself. She was an idiot. She knew it, but, at least, <em>now</em> she was accepting it.</p><p>He couldn’t be dying. She didn’t want him to die. She had so much to tell him. She had so much she wanted to do with him even though she knew he would never want her the same. Even though she knew that he never really cared.</p><p>“No matter what you and your father did… I don’t want you to die,” She admitted. Her voice trembled. Her tears spilled on his knuckles. She was finally admitting it.</p><p>And that’s when his fingers twitched and gave her own a gentle squeeze. “Hannah?”</p><p><em>No. </em>It couldn’t have been her. She was <em>dead. He had killed her </em>and that very thought, that very memory hurt worse than those alien cells that were slowly destroying and plaguing his skin. His whole body ached and he didn’t move because he couldn’t, but he did fill a warm hand over his. Warm fingers, lacing with his own. No one of the nurses would dare do that to him because he was and he had been the <em>heartless boss of that doomed company that everybody blamed. </em>The son of the man <em>who had destroyed so many people’s lives. Including hers. No. </em>He had <em>taken hers, </em>and he had been blaming himself for it every single day.</p><p><em>She was nothing to me, </em>he kept saying to himself. It never really worked.</p><p>But whose was that voice? Could it be hers? Could she be alive? After all these months of going through hell, he would sit in the dark and think of how he had failed her that day. He would think of the moment that she had walked out of that helicopter, and he would think of the sight of her standing in the midst of all this destruction, knowing that he had brought it upon her. It always hurt so <em>damn much </em>but he would always <em>bite</em> the pain <em>back</em> and he would move on because he had always been <em>so good at moving on. </em></p><p><em>No. </em>He was terrible at it, but if he looked ahead, and focus on his job, then things would get easier. He had accepted that she was dead. He had accepted that he had <em>killed her, </em>but she was there. Rufus opened his eyes and he looked down and he saw her. She was kneeling beside him on the floor. She was holding his hand. She was in a lab-coat. Her face lifted up at the sound of her name and she looked up at him with shiny eyes and drenched eyelashes.</p><p><em>It was her</em>. It was really her and he felt the relief that he hadn’t felt ever since that moment that they had shared in that emergency room right before everything went <em>downhill. Was she really there? Could she really be alive? </em>It could very well be his mind playing tricks on him, but that barely ever happened. He always had such control over his thoughts.</p><p>“Are you… really… here?” He asked. He had to make sure. He had to make sure that it was her, that she wasn’t dead, that he hadn’t <em>killed her. </em></p><p>Hannah nodded. He could tell she was holding back her sobs. He could tell she was trying not to break down. She laced their fingers together. She was in no makeup nor any fancy dress, and her eyes were puffy and red from the tears that she had shed for him. But she was beautiful nonetheless. She was <em>perfect </em>just like he remembered her.</p><p>“I’m here…” she said and her voice trembled.</p><p>Hannah sat beside him on the bed and he shifted closer to her. He needed to get closer. He needed her arms around him. He needed her to hold him and he hated how much he had missed her. He hated how much he needed her whilst he shouldn’t be. He shouldn’t be needing <em>anybody.</em> But two years without her had been exactly like the first two years after his mother’s death.</p><p>She sat beside him on the edge of the bed and she passed a hand around him. Her back rested against the bed frame, and his back rested on top of her chest. Rufus buried his face in her neck and shut his eyes and breathed shakily.<em> How was she there? </em>He didn’t want to know. He didn’t want to know what had happened, he was just glad that she was there, <em>with</em> him. Holding him just like she had held him that day in that room in the Shinra Tower.</p><p>“I left you there… I let you die… I’m so sorry,” His fingers gave her own a gentle squeeze and she couldn’t believe he had just told her that. Maybe he <em>did care. </em>Maybe he <em>did mean it when he said he loved her. </em>She couldn’t tell whether she should let him fool her once more, but she wanted so much to believe him. She wanted to know that he <em>cared</em>.</p><p>Hannah pressed a kiss to his bandaged temple and her fingers found his hair. “Hush, just rest… just rest, I’ll be here,”</p><p>Rufus sighed and he shut his eyes, pushing a tear down his cheek. Normally he would scold at himself for <em>crying, </em>but right <em>now</em>, he was so <em>weak </em>and exhausted, he just sighed against her neck and breathed her in and relished in the warmth of her touch. The tender stroke of her fingers in his hair that eased the headache that had been tormenting him.</p><p>He was never going to let her out of his sight ever again. He was never going to let her go. <em>No. </em>Whether she wanted it or not he was going to keep her there with him and he didn’t care if she objected. He <em>needed </em>her there. He needed her with him and no matter how much he hated himself for that, he couldn’t stop it. He would hate himself <em>more </em>if he knew she was in danger and he was doing nothing about it. Just like he had done <em>that day.</em></p><p>“Don’t ever leave me again…” Rufus’s hand held her own impossibly tight as if he was afraid, she was going to leave. As if he was afraid, she was going to pull away <em>again </em>and leave him. “…do you understand me? Don’t you ever leave me again, Hannah,” It was as if he was giving an order, but his voice cracked and he buried his face further into her neck no matter how the movement brought pain to his muscles and his body. These were words that he’d be too ashamed to speak to <em>anyone</em>, but <em>now</em> he didn’t know how much longer he had left. He didn’t want to spend his last days like he had spent those two years.</p><p>“I’m not going anywhere, I promise…” Hannah buried her face in his hair and wetted them with tears of her own. She couldn’t tell how much he’d been through, but she was there with him <em>now. </em>They couldn’t have suffered so much just to have him <em>die now </em>from Geostigma. “…you’re not going anywhere either, you hear me?”</p><p>He did not answer. He couldn’t give fake promises.</p><p>Her hands tightened around him. “I’m not going to let you,”</p><p>“There’s no cure,” Rufus whispered against her neck and she wept.</p><p>“We’ll find one!”</p><p>She didn’t want to think of the worst scenario. She didn’t want him to die. She loved him. He pulled his face and he looked up at her. He was allowing her to see him <em>cry</em>. He was allowing her to see those tears slipping down his cheeks. He had never allowed anyone to watch him being so <em>pitiful, </em>but she was there, and he didn’t care to be exposed to her. <em>He had been before</em>. She <em>loved him. She had told him. </em>Her hands found his face. Both her hands cupped his cheeks and he sighed as her thumbs reached for his tears wiping them away.</p><p>She met his eyes with her own “Rufus, we’ll find a cure-”</p><p>“I should have never given you that gun-”</p><p>“Rufus, listen to me-”</p><p>“Hannah, just…” he didn’t know what he was saying, what he was doing. For once in his life, he didn’t know what to say and what to do. He didn’t want to watch her cry. He didn’t want to die, <em>not now. </em>Not as much as he didn’t care about it in the entirety of those two years that had passed. But this was <em>so wrong. </em>He wasn’t supposed to fall for anyone, and he wasn’t supposed to make somebody fall for him. He did not have the time for this. He did not want to feel the pain of <em>dying </em>and leaving her back. He knew how much pain that a loss of a loved one inflicted on someone and he didn’t want to bring it to her. He had let her die. <em>Why did she come back?</em> <em>Why didn’t she just stay hidden? Away from me? </em>It would only make sense if she did that, but <em>no, </em>she was there and he couldn’t understand. “Please, hate me like you ought to do. Why are you here? Why are you holding me? Why did you come back-”</p><p>“I love you, Rufus,”</p><p>“You shouldn’t-”</p><p>“It doesn’t matter. I do,” Hannah cut him and he just looked at her and for once in his life, he was <em>so confused</em>. He wasn’t worthy of any of that, he couldn’t understand. He couldn’t understand <em>how </em>she had fallen for him and maybe she couldn’t understand either.</p><p>His stigmatised hand found her cheek. He winced slightly, but his thumb brushed against her skin, wiping that tear away before he guided her face down to his. He caught her lips with his own and she sighed. She tasted his tears on his lips before she met his tongue with her own and he sighed in her mouth. He had missed this. He had missed this <em>so much</em>. He had missed her and he was too tired to scold himself for that. He just sank in this moment. The only moment he’d let go of all that self-control that he had all these years.</p><p>She pulled back from the kiss and she dragged kisses all the way up to his forehead. She wasn’t going to let him <em>die. Not now </em>that they had just found each other. She knew who could find a cure. She knew exactly what to do <em>tomorrow. </em></p><p>◄ ◊ ► ◄ ◊ ► ◉ ◄ ◊ ► ◄ ◊ ►</p><p>“Found anything of use?”</p><p>Hannah knew Rufus had already been sending her brother to find Dr. Jocasta H. Ernchester to help find a cure. No matter what the Professor had said, Hannah was sure she had figured it out.</p><p>After lots of convincing, she finally came. Rufus offered her to search the old Corporate Archives that they had scavenged from the rubble in Midgar. They were the only lead that they had to Hojo’s experiments on JENOVA’s and Rufus knew that it was that being that was at fault for Geostigma.</p><p>The Professor did not look well. She was dressed in black, and a black piece of wood was in her hand, serving as a cane to help her stand. <em>Well, </em>she still looked better than <em>him. </em>Rufus pressed the controls on the arm of his chair and guided the wheelchair towards the table that she had settled in the midst of the old bookcases that held old, leather folders. She had a couple of notebooks in front of her on the table and her cane was propped beside her.</p><p>Rude was standing guard, but he wasn’t really needed. That woman could barely walk. She wasn’t a threat. Rufus nodded at him and Rude exited the room closing the door behind him.</p><p>“I did,” She said. Her hand reached for the notebooks “These are mine, by the way. I’m taking them with me,”</p><p>Rufus frowned beneath the sheet that covered him. “These are property of the company, Professor,”</p><p>Jocasta sighed. “Let me have a look on that eye, will you?” she offered. She was smart.</p><p>Rufus hummed in acceptance. She got up from her chair and she limply walked towards him. She rolled another chair beside him and she sat down. His hands reached for the sheet that covered his face and he pulled it off, revealing his messy hair and the tight bandages that were tied around his head, covering his one eye.</p><p>Her hands reached up for his face. “May I?”</p><p>He was surprised she was even asking. He couldn’t believe that this woman had worked alongside Hojo. She didn’t seem to have that <em>insanity </em>that Hojo in him. Rufus noted to himself to make a small research on her past. It was intriguing.</p><p>She unfolded his bandages and she revealed his eye. She didn’t grimace, neither cringe when she looked at his eye. He knew it was bad. He knew everybody grimaced when they’d see it. But she wasn’t affected by it at all. She cupped his face taking a better look before she sighed and she pulled her hands away. She reached for her bag that she had settled on top of the table and she started fumbling through the stuff that she had there.</p><p>“Who’s been overseeing your recovery, Mr. President?” She asked.</p><p>“We hire only the best Doctors, Professor,”</p><p>Jocasta chuckled doubtfully. “Yeah, right,” But then she pulled out two ampules and a syringe, and Rufus turned and looked cautiously at the objects that she placed on the table. He watched her as she filled the syringe with a greenish phosphorescent liquid from the one ampule and he arched an eyebrow.</p><p>“What’s that?” Rufus asked.</p><p>Jocasta pursed her lips as she watched the liquid being poured into the syringe. “Thirty-five years ago, I started researching on self-healing. It took me a while before I figured out a way to decode JENOVA’s genome and find out what that being was capable of. Self-healing is one of its abilities. I translated into DNA that specific sequence that’s needed for self-healing and I grew it into bacteria. The liquid that they produce is this,” Jocasta explained. She tapped the syringe with her fingers “There you have it. Self-healing,”</p><p>“You’re not convincing me, Doctor,” Rufus said incredulously.</p><p><em>What kind of bullshit is this? </em>Did she really think he would believe her? <em>Self-healing </em>sounded like something to come from a fairytale. But this was <em>real-life. </em>There was no way she had achieved that no matter how much of an <em>incredible </em>scientist Hannah presented her to be.</p><p>But she still seemed dead serious about what she was saying. “Mr. President, if I don’t fix that eye, you’ll lose your sight,”</p><p><em>Why would she even- </em>­<em>No, </em>there was something that she wanted from him and that was exactly why she was trying to help him. Besides, he had no idea what that thing in that syringe was. There was no way he was letting her inject him with it. For all he knew, she might have even tried to kill him. He did try to <em>execute her </em>with the rest of the AVALANCHE team back in Junon.</p><p>“Why would you even want to fix me?”</p><p>“For the same reason, I fixed Tseng while you left him bleed to death back in that Temple,”</p><p>If he was honest with himself, he really didn’t have something to say to that. Tseng never told him what happened in that Temple and he didn’t care. He had left him die and he expected him to be dead, but he returned back without so much as a scratch. He did let him know he would let him die again <em>if he had to. </em>The Turks were expendable. They <em>had </em>to be if he was to be good in his job. <em>Yeah, they were.</em> <em>Hannah wasn’t. </em></p><p>“Alright, then, let’s make a deal. I fix your Geostigma, you give me back my notebooks,”</p><p>He chuckled. Her cockiness was slightly amusing. “Fix my Geostigma? I’ve got numerous scientists that have been researching on it for months and they haven’t found anything. How am I supposed to believe that you can actually-OW!”</p><p>The sting on his arm was sudden. He didn’t have the time to muffle the sound that tore through his throat. She had actually injected him with the greenish liquid. Jocasta cringed. She never had a stable arm to make painless injections, but he wasn’t sitting still either. The greenish liquid coursed all around his body and suddenly the pain on his eye and wherever he had skin rotting away, it just stopped. He could see clearly with his eye. He could move his hands and his feet without wincing in pain. The black marks were disappearing with new tissue being repaired.</p><p>“With all due respect, shut the fuck up, Mr. President. I’m trying to fix you here,” Jocasta said calmly as she pulled out the needle and pressed a cotton drenched in alcohol on the tiny hole that she had created on his skin.</p><p>“What the hell?!” He cried out frustrated as his other hand reached for the cotton and he pressed it on his forearm “I didn’t take the fucking deal!”</p><p>“I don’t care,” Jocasta said as she came back with another syringe filled with the purplish liquid this time.</p><p>This time he grabbed her arm. His fingers clenched tightly around her wrist. She had a scar around her wrist, but he didn’t care where it had come from but she winced. He would’ve attacked her <em>if he could move. </em>But what she had already unleashed to his body, seemed to be working. He knew he’d be able to stand on his feet <em>now </em>and that was <em>massive </em>progress comparing to what his own <em>Doctors</em> had tried on him to help him recover. He shouldn’t be hurting her while all she seemed to try to do was <em>fix </em>him, but he couldn’t trust <em>anybody. </em></p><p>It was his job not to.</p><p>“And what is that?” He asked and she knew he wasn’t going to let go of her hand unless she explained.</p><p>She sighed. “That is the serum that I injected Sephiroth with, two years ago. It contains the antibodies that detect and destroy JENOVA cells inside one’s body. So, now, I used the self-healing serum, to heal -nay, replace- all the damaged cells of your body, and now I’m gonna inject you with the antibodies. They’re going to instantly wipe out every single cell of JENOVA’s from your body. So, there you have it, a cure for Geostigma. Mind letting my hand go?” Jocasta explained, but he did need a moment to process that.</p><p>Her words made sense and he did feel better <em>already. </em>He let go of her hand and she injected him again nearby the same spot on his forearm. The sting came much smoother this time and he could already feel a <em>weight </em>lifting off of his shoulders. Maybe she had <em>indeed </em>figured it out.</p><p>Jocasta pulled out the needle and pressed on the tiny whole with another cotton drenched in alcohol. “You’re welcome,” she said as she tossed the syringe and ampules back into her bag, along with her notebooks. He didn’t really mind if she’d take them at this point. She passed the bag by her shoulder and she made her way towards the door to leave.</p><p><em>No. Just like that? </em>He knew she had already explained to him how she had done it and he could very well pass it on to the rest of his scientists, but she was <em>leaving? Just like that? </em>Was she not going to ask for anything in return? That was foreign. His entire life he knew that if somebody gave him something, they always needed something in return. This was foreign. How does one act out of pure kindness and nothing more?</p><p>His hands found the arms of his wheelchair and he stood up. It felt so good being able to stand up without the need of a nurse’s or Hannah’s help. He got to pain from anywhere. His muscles no longer hurt. His hands traced the spots on which they were previously stigmatised. He wouldn’t dare to touch those parts from the pain. </p><p>“Professor!”</p><p>His voice stopped her. Jocasta sighed irritatingly as she pressed her weight on her cane and she winced on the effort to turn her body and look at him. He looked at her at the sorry state that she was in. She looked no older than thirty, yet there she was with a cane in her hand to be able to stand and walk. She looked exhausted as if she hadn’t slept in <em>weeks, </em>yet again she helped him. She helped the son of the man who was possibly the source of all her struggles. He knew of only one other person who had done this. <em>Hannah. </em>No matter what he and his father had done to her, she was with him. </p><p>“How do I repay you?”</p><p>Jocasta just chuckled and shrugged. “Nothing. Just… save the world. Don’t destroy it for money. Don’t be a prick like your father. You know you’re better than that,”</p><p>And with that she turned around and limply walked out of the room.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0024"><h2>24. the end of the worst fucking company</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><strong>ONE YEAR LATER</strong> another company had emerged. The World Re-genesis Organisation. <em>Of course</em>, it was funded by no other but Rufus Shinra. The Shinra Electric Power Company was on the verge of getting bankrupt, or at least, that’s what everybody thought. At least, these were the rumours that the Turks had spread with a little bit of effort.</p><p>Rufus, basically, wanted to erase <em>Shinra </em>no matter how much of a shame it was. The world <em>hated </em>Shinra after everything that had happened, and he himself had grown to loathe the company that once he called his own. <em>No. </em>It wasn’t <em>his own. It was his father’s.</em> He need not to hide in the shadow of his father anymore. He wanted to create something new. Something <em>better</em> and that something was the WRO. An organisation completely dedicated to rebuilding the world and he wanted no other to govern it but <em>Reeve Tuesti</em>.</p><p>Though, after dealing with the Remnants and curing Geostigma, a new problem emerged no long after. Rufus did not remember himself being angrier in his life. It was when Tseng entered his office with some old files that nobody cared about anymore. <em>Deepground. </em>He could not believe that there was an entire City beneath Midgar, and he didn’t know. No one had briefed him on that matter. Deepground held the vilest, strongest test subjects of Shinra’s. The measures his father had taken to quench his thirst for power were <em>sickening. </em>Rufus had anonymously supplied the WRO with all the gil they needed to deal with that new threat, and they did.</p><p>It had been another year, but things in Gaia had never been more peaceful and Hannah had been with him all along, just like she had promised. Every morning he would go to the headquarters of whatever was left of Shinra, and Hannah would go to the WRO. She had started working there as a research scientist after she finished studying for her doctorate.</p><p>She was third in command and she couldn’t believe she even deserved that position. But she was one of the oldest scientists there. Life had been <em>amazing. </em>For once in her life, she loved her everyday life. She didn’t mind going to the labs and work there all day, but what she loved the most, was that in the afternoons Rufus would pass by and pick her from work and they would return together to their house in Junon. They had been living together, and life was just <em>not lonely </em>anymore.</p><p>She had no nightmares anymore. She had no company to worry about, though, she did have the plans for tidal power in her old files and she had talked to Rufus about it. He liked the idea, and he had said he <em>would look into it. Of course</em>, he was busy. Shinra hadn’t <em>bankrupted </em>just yet, but they were close to getting there.</p><p>After another day of work, both had no energy to do anything else but just lie down to bed. Rufus had just finished the paperwork and he had just joined her on the bed. She looked already in deep sleep when he got there. Her hair was a beautiful blonde mess against the pillow. Her body was hidden beneath the bedsheets. Her eyes closed as soft breaths escaped her nose. She looked peaceful and he couldn’t believe he was staring down at her.</p><p>He had seen her sleep so many times before but she had always been so <em>precious </em>to look at, he couldn’t understand himself. But he knew he never lied. He never lied when he told her <em>he loved her </em>that day in Midgar. His weight pressed down on the mattress as he lied beside her. He wanted to hold her but he didn’t want to wake her.</p><p>Rufus’s hand reached for her cheek, caressing her skin softly with his thumb before he realised, he was smiling. <em>Oh Gaia, </em>it was taking him long, but the more time he spent with her, the more he fell. The more time he spent away from her, the more he couldn’t wait for him to close that <em>wretched </em>company and just <em>be with her. </em></p><p>She tilted her face to the side where his hand lingered and before he knew it, she had kissed his thumb. She turned and looked at him and gave him a smile. It was that <em>genuine, happy smile </em>that he always loved to see on her lips. All their problems were gone <em>now. </em>Geostigma and JENOVA, and Deepground, and Shinra were history. He had a future to protect <em>now. Her. </em></p><p>Hannah shifted closer to him. Her body faced his. His hands slipped around her as she buried her face in his neck and she sighed there contently. She felt the weight of his cheek pressing on top of her head and they both closed their tired eyes and relished in each other’s arms in the dark room. He was holding her close and tight. He always held her tight as if he was afraid, she was going to leave. She wouldn’t blame him. She had left him so many times.</p><p><em>Not again. Never </em>again. He felt her fingers drawing circled against his chest and she pressed a kiss on top of the grey shirt that he was wearing. His hand found her hair, slightly tugging on them and pulling her head back to look at her. His icy-blue eyes found her own and he pressed their foreheads together.</p><p>“Hannah…”</p><p>“Yes?”</p><p>“I love you,”</p><p>She giggled. Her hands found his face, cupping his cheeks. “I love you too,”</p><p>“Say it again,”</p><p>She bit her lip as she leaned closer. “I love you, Rufus Shinra,”</p><p>“Again,”</p><p>“I love yo-” she never got to complete the sentence as his lips found hers. His tongue found her own and they both sighed as they met each other’s taste. Hannah’s fingers found his hair and she felt his own fingers clutching around her nightgown and pressing her body against his own.</p><p>He just wanted to hold her close and relish in this moment. He was just glad he had this. <em>Someone </em>who could love <em>him. Him, </em>the man that everybody hated except maybe the people that he paid. But <em>no, </em>he didn’t care about the others. She <em>loved him. </em>It was enough. It was <em>more than enough. </em></p><p>They pulled away from the kiss and she nuzzled her face back in his neck. He buried his nose in her hair and breathed her in and closed his eyes.</p><p>He knew exactly what was left to do.</p><p>◄ ◊ ► ◄ ◊ ► ◉ ◄ ◊ ► ◄ ◊ ►</p><p>He never thought he would do this. But he had approximately <em>one </em>hour blank, so he had to make a quick work of it. <em>It was a mistake. Oh, </em>he knew. It was a terrible one. <em>Going to ask for advice from an old foe? Nice one. </em>He was just glad there wasn’t anybody around to recognise him, and it was evening so the bar would be empty.</p><p><em>Yes. Tifa </em>wasn’t a Turk. She wasn’t somebody that he was paying so whatever she’d say she would say it honestly, and out of all the people that he knew she was the most empathetic, <em>honest </em>one. He wouldn’t dare to deal with Elena’s enthusiasm if he ever got to her. He couldn’t talk to anybody else about it. He needed somebody who could keep a secret and Tifa was <em>admittedly </em>the best option.</p><p>Rufus entered the new Seventh Heaven that was established in the newly rebuilt City of Edge. He had phoned her, of course, to let her know that he would be passing by and <em>why</em>. He knew if he showed up in the doorstep unannounced, he would get a punch in the face by the martial artist right away. But even through the phone he could even <em>imagine </em>her grinning when he told her the <em>problem</em>.</p><p>Tifa was rubbing the counter with a cloth. A smile flashed across her lips when she saw him entering her empty bar that she was preparing for the night. She was wearing a black skirt and pants, and another black shirt above. Her black silky hair reached her waist from behind.</p><p>“Glad you could make it…” Tifa said as she pulled the cloth away and she turned around reaching up for the shelves. “…so, what would you like me to make? You’ll either ask for something extremely special, or something extremely plain,” Tifa said as she stared thoughtfully at the series of bottles that she had on her shelves.</p><p>“Just water, please. I have a meeting in an hour,” Rufus said as he settled on a bench across her on the counter.</p><p>“Very well,” Tifa said as she poured some water in the glass that she had picked and she handed it to him. She rested her elbows on the counter across him and she looked at the man that she once hated. They had <em>really </em>come a long way. “So? Did you get it?”</p><p>Rufus sighed. “I didn’t know which one to choose so I got all of them,” He might have been an experienced businessman that could handle more than two companies and a City at once. He might have been <em>a poet with a gun</em> during a fight, but when it came to <em>relationships -</em>and specifically- <em>this kind, </em>he was useless.</p><p>Tifa’s eyes widened for a second. “All… of them??” but then she reminded herself that he had no problem doing that <em>when he owned half the planet. </em></p><p>Rufus sighed once again. <em>He was really helpless, wasn’t he? </em>He brought up the bag he had carried all the way from the store and he placed it on top of the counter taking out numerous velvety boxes.</p><p>Tifa had to make a double-take as he spread them out in front of her. “Oh boy…” Her hand found her hair, pushing a strand back. <em>That Hannah girl </em>must have really been a lucky one.</p><p>Tifa checked out each one of them. All engagement rings were beautiful and she wouldn’t blame him if he couldn’t pick. Besides, it made sense he would have no idea about such things. Tifa turned her attention back at Rufus who was impatiently waiting for her to pick one.</p><p>“Alright, what’s her favourite colour?” Tifa asked and at that Rufus’s mind went blank.</p><p>He could have sworn, she had mentioned it <em>once. </em>“Uhh…”</p><p>Tifa gasped “You don’t know her favourite colour?!”</p><p>“I think… I…”</p><p>“How’re you going to get her to marry you if you don’t know her favourite colour?!” Tifa was visibly <em>pissed. </em>   </p><p>“How am I supposed to know her favourite colour?!” Rufus tried to say defensively but she shot him a glare.</p><p>“You’re supposed to know <em>her, </em>including <em>her favourite colour!” </em>Tifa said and Rufus sighed.</p><p><em>This is ridiculous. What am I doing?! </em>His hand reached for his pocket, drawing out his phone. “I bet she, herself, doesn’t even know what her favourite colour is,”</p><p>“That’s ridiculous,” Tifa arched an eyebrow.</p><p>“I’m gonna call her,” Rufus searched for her number in his list of contacts and Tifa’s eyes widened.</p><p>“No! Don’t you-” Tifa tried to stop him but he had already dialled the number. “There’s no way she doesn’t know!” Tifa whispered incredulously, but he opened the speaker to prove her wrong.</p><p><em>“Hey, honey,” </em>Hannah responded no long after.</p><p>“What’s your favourite colour, Hannah?”</p><p>
  <em>“Uh… I don’t remember…” </em>
</p><p><em>No. </em>This was impossible. Tifa shot him a shocked look before she facepalmed and groaned mentally. <em>They’re made for each other. </em></p><p>
  <em>“…let me ask Hester, she’ll probably remember. Hester, do you remember what my favourite colour is?”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“Uh… I thought you mentioned lilac the other day,” </em>
</p><p><em>“Oohhh! Right! Yes, it’s lilac, honey,” </em>Hannah finally answered. She giggled <em>“Why that question, though?” </em></p><p>A small smile flashed across Rufus’s lips. “You’ll find out,” He said before he ended the call and tossed the phone back in his bag. “There you have it,”</p><p>Tifa tried to ignore the fact that she <em>didn’t even now remember her favourite colour. Whoah, </em>and she just focused on the rings that she had spread in front of her.</p><p>“Alright, the stone closest to that colour is that- Oh my- is that a purple diamond?!” Tifa said as her eyes widened and she looked down that valuable stone in wonder.</p><p>Rufus sipped his water. “Looks like one,” he shrugged.</p><p>“Is it natural?!” Tifa asked as she looked immediately at the list with the details of the rings that he had bought. “Oh Gaia, it is! It’s 3.40-carats! Have you got any idea how much this is worth!?”</p><p>Rufus just gave her a look with an arched eyebrow, letting her know that <em>he had bought it. Of course, he knew. </em></p><p>Tifa had to get it together and bite all that excitement away. “Right, right, of course, you do, sorry, this just…” She looked at the ring. The beautiful purple, circular diamond was nicely placed in the platinum ring, with smaller lilac stones following on each side. The more she stared at it, the more she fell in love. “…this is the one,” Tifa said with a dreamy look on her face before she placed it back into its dark blue, velvet box and handed it to him.</p><p>“Alright, then, I’ll just return the others,” Rufus said before he placed all other boxes in the bag and he stood up to leave. “Thank you, for the help,”</p><p>“Wait, I have something to give you,” Tifa’s voice came from behind and he had to turn around and look at her.</p><p>Her hands reached for a shelf in the counter in front of her and she pulled out a white folder, offering it to him. Rufus approached her and took the folder in his hands looking at the writing in the front.</p><p>For Mr. Rufus Shinra and Ms. Hannah Sinclair</p><p>He arched an eyebrow. “What is this?”</p><p>“It’s Jocasta’s and Vincent’s wedding invitation. Cloud offered to give it to the Turks in the WRO HQ, but since you’re here, I could give it to you in person,” Tifa explained and Rufus took a moment to open the invitation and read. It was to take place in a large hall outside of Mideel.</p><p>He didn’t know whether they should go or not. He didn’t even know <em>why </em>they would invite him. For all he knew, Shinra was the one who had hired the scientist and provided him with the labs to experiment on them and make their lives <em>a living hell</em>. <em>This can either be a trap or- </em>but he stopped thinking like this when he reminded himself, that if Jocasta Ernchester wanted to kill him, she would have done so when she cured his Geostigma. She wouldn’t have cured him at all.</p><p>“I know you probably won’t want to come but… it could be the perfect place to propose to Hannah,” Tifa suggested and he found that <em>she wasn’t wrong. “</em>Oh, and by the way,” Tifa’s voice stopped him from walking and he turned around to look at her. “I did tell <em>one </em>person about our conversation,”</p><p>At that, Rufus’s eyes widened. <em>How dare she?! </em>He really thought he could trust Tifa. He parted his lips to speak but then he heard footsteps and a pair of small hands caught his own. Rufus looked down only to see an eleven-year-old girl. Her hands both tugged on his own and he turned and looked at her dumbfounded.</p><p>“Are you Hannah’s boyfriend?” The little girl asked -Marlene must have been her name.</p><p>“Uh…” he didn’t know how to react. He hadn’t been around little ones before and he always admitted to himself that he despised them and that they were a <em>waste of time, space, and money. </em>But the little girl looked up at him with such excitement and innocence in her wide doe-brown eyes that he couldn’t help shooting all thoughts of <em>irritation </em>away. “…yes,” Rufus knelt down to the little girl’s height. “Do you know her?”  </p><p>Marlene nodded. “She was badly wounded when I found her with Elmyra two years ago. She looked sad,”</p><p>At that, Rufus’s eyes widened, but he hid his surprise right away. Hannah had never told him how she was rescued that day. It was the day that he had <em>left her there, to die. </em>It was the day that he had been regretting ever since. That little girl had saved Hannah that day when he was too weak to do <em>anything </em>but <em>leave her there. </em></p><p>“Do you make her happy?” Marlene asked and Rufus felt like he needed to think about it for a moment.</p><p><em>Sure, </em>he was happy having her there with him, but <em>was she?</em> She had no nightmares anymore, so long as they slept together, and she always had that smile on her face that he always longed to see. <em>Yes. </em>They <em>were </em>happy, <em>now, </em>that everything was over and he was hoping they could stay that way for as long as they could. <em>Together. </em></p><p>“I’m trying to,” Rufus answered and she gave him a smile before she caught his hand again and she started dragging him with her.</p><p>“C’mon!”</p><p>Rufus had no choice but to follow and he heard a chuckle coming from Tifa as she followed them from behind. “Uh… where are we-”</p><p>“Have you met Aerith? She told me where Hannah was before I found her,” Marlene said as she stopped dragging him for a moment and she turned and looked at him with her bright, excited eyes. “You know, you should bring her flowers sometime,”</p><p>What was the little girl talking about? The Cetra was dead. JENOVA had killed her almost four years ago. But <em>no, </em>the little girl seemed sure about it. Maybe she was talking about a tomb, or maybe the Cetra’s church. He couldn’t tell how Aerith had contacted with Marlene, and he didn’t know <em>why </em>would Aerith help someone she didn’t even know, <em>Hannah. </em>But he knew now who had actually saved Hannah.</p><p>An honest smile flashed across Rufus’s lips and Tifa could have sworn, this was the first time she had seen him <em>actually </em>smile. He took Marlene’s hand in his “That’s a great idea. Will you help me?”</p><p>He couldn’t believe the little girl had <em>actually melted</em> his heart.   </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0025"><h2>25. I finally reached the fucking epilogue</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><strong>HE COULDN’T</strong> take his eyes off of her the moment she walked down the staircase. Her dress, and her hair, and her makeup were all very simple. But he had found, over the months they had spent together, that it was the simple things that suited her. Hannah was already too beautiful. She did not need to fix her face with thick layers of makeup, nor did she need some <em>extreme </em>dress to make her body appealing.</p><p>He had fallen deep, <em>hadn’t he? </em>His hand reached the pocket of his black pants, making sure that he had taken that velvet, small box with him. It was right there and <em>now </em>he just had to make sure she wouldn’t notice it. He knew Hannah was smart. She could see from <em>miles </em>away what he was planning to do because only a few months together were enough for her to learn <em>reading</em> the most <em>unreadable </em>man on Gaia. It both frightened and impressed him.</p><p>He couldn’t have it any other way.</p><p>“You’re staring,” It was the next thing that he heard coming from her and he’d realised she was standing right before him. Her hands gathered in front of her, both holding on her purse. Her hair was picked in a bun with a couple of forelocks falling on her forehead. Her dress was a dark blue that reached just beneath her knees. A small V on the chest and a slightly exposed back. The sleeves were long and it made sense that they would be. It was December.</p><p>Even the outskirts of Mideel were slightly covered in a thin layer of snow and it was cold outside. It was going to start snowing <em>again</em>. She was holding his coat in her hands, alongside her own. He had barely noticed, but the more she stayed with him, the less work she left for the maids and the butlers to do. She had almost brought up the fact, that she didn’t want to have people do chores for them, and that she’d rather do all these herself. He had <em>declined, of course. </em>No -<em>soon to become a Mrs. Shinra</em>- was fit to do such <em>chores. </em></p><p>But he hadn’t told her yet. He was going to propose <em>tonight. </em>Tonight was that wedding that they had to attend, and at first, he thought it to be a useless way to waste his time, but after Hannah insisted they go, and after Tifa offered the <em>idea </em>to steal away and propose after the wedding, he had backed down. He was -<em>honestly</em>- out of ideas. He could arrange the biggest of shows and festivals and parades, but he was sure, that Hannah wanted none of these. She wanted <em>him, </em>not his money and what he could do with them, and that was one of the many reasons he had fallen for her.</p><p>She had saved him from both certain death <em>and </em>his own lonely, insufferable <em>self</em>. How could he not stare at that gorgeous woman who was now standing before him? She had <em>that smile</em>. Those beautiful light-green eyes of hers found his own and he instantly knew he was making the right choice. <em>No, </em>making her <em>his wife</em>, was probably the only <em>right </em>decision that he had made in his life and was so sure about. He instantly knew that everything about that ring in this pocket, and everything about them both, it was everything so, <em>so, right. </em></p><p>He just gave her a smile. He couldn’t explain all of these. He didn’t know <em>how</em>. She brought up his coat and helped him put it on. He was handsome. <em>Perfect, </em>as always. She could stare at him, and she’d never get tired of it. A grey tie -that she had knotted for him- rested on top of his black shirt, and a white jacket on top, with black pants and shoes. His hair, perfectly set on one side of his forehead. How did she want to mess them up with her fingers, once more?</p><p>He took her own coat from her hands and he walked behind her, settling it around her shoulders. His hands found their way around her. Warm palms pressed flat on her belly as he leaned from behind and his lips found her cheek. He pressed a warm kiss there, and he could even feel the heat of her blush beneath his lips. She was <em>his, alas, </em>no matter how beautiful were the previous women he had dated, none were like her, and he didn’t care about <em>looks </em>as much as he cared about <em>inner beauty. </em>The one that he had once <em>given up </em>to find. <em>Actually</em>, he had never even intended to <em>search, </em>but there <em>it was</em>.</p><p>“You’re breathtaking, Hannah,” He whispered warmly against her earlobe and Hannah was sure her face was just as red as her brother’s hair -if not a darker shade.</p><p>Her hands found his own that was still around her, pressing her back against the frame of his body. She chuckled as she turned to face him. Her hands found the buttons of his coat, and started buttoning them up, avoiding his gaze as much as she could afford.</p><p>“I’m sure you’ve seen better,”</p><p>Rufus’s hands found her own as she finished buttoning his coat. His fingers traced the back of her palms, and his thumbs found the base of her own. “Not at all. I’d be lying if I said I have,” He hated knowing that sometimes -no matter how much he showed her how beautiful and precious she was- she still thought otherwise. She let her hands sink in his own and she looked up at him. “Hannah,” He really wasn’t one to say such things. He really wasn’t the kind of man who would just <em>speak out</em>. He’d always rather put into <em>action </em>what others say in words. But maybe she <em>needed </em>to hear him say that. “You’ve no idea how much you mean to me,”</p><p>At that, she gave him <em>that </em>smile, and it made his heart flutter. Only then did he realise he had leaned down to her and his nose was touching hers, and his breath was landing warmly on her lips. She let go of his hands and she reached up for his face, right before he leaned closer and met her lips with his own. His arms found their way around her and pulled her close. She let out a soft moan when their tongues met, and both shut their eyes. No matter how many times they’d kiss, it always felt like the very first time.</p><p>If she hadn’t pulled back, he knew they would never make it to that wedding.</p><p>But they did get there on time, and there were surprisingly <em>many </em>people invited. He could make out a few old doctors and scientists of Shinra’s or Mideel’s clinic, or <em>now </em>WRO’s. They all must have been old colleagues of Jocasta’s thirty years ago. The old AVALANCHE team was there, including Hester, Reeve, and Shalua. They had taken over the front seats and Rufus with Hannah settled three rows back. Even the Turks were there and it made sense that they would be. Reeve had mentioned that Vincent Valentine was also recruited to train the new generation of Turks alongside the other four.</p><p>And then came the bride. Jocasta was escorted by no other than Sephiroth. It made sense that Sephiroth -that boy that she had raised and cared for- would be the one to walk her down the aisle. They weren’t related by blood, but Sephiroth was reunited with his <em>mother</em>. <em>And his father. </em>Rufus couldn’t say he didn’t feel at least <em>a little bit </em>jealous. He wasn’t fortunate with his parents and he always knew his father showed greater affection for that man that he showed to his own son. But Hannah and so many people in there <em>weren’t fortunate with their parents either</em>. Besides, maybe Sephiroth too wasn’t fortunate with his parents either.</p><p>The Turks found the <em>classified</em> information on <em>Jocasta H. Ernchester </em>that Rufus -out of pure curiosity- had requested. It was a <em>sweet irony</em> to know that the woman that Sephiroth <em>now </em>called <em>mom, </em>wasn’t exactly the woman who had looked after him <em>thirty </em>years ago. Jocasta <em>H.</em> Ernchester had <em>indeed died thirty years ago. </em>That woman <em>there, now, </em>it wasn’t <em>her. </em></p><p>But it was best that <em>no one ever found out. </em>    </p><p>This was a <em>wedding</em>. They were happy and such <em>classified information </em>would ruin it all. It was best if they never knew unless by <em>some miracle </em>Jocasta would retrieve her memories. <em>No. </em>Hopefully, she never would. Rufus could pretty much tell they were happy from the way the groom and bride suppressed their laughs as the best man -Cid Highwind- messed up with the cards and the things that he had to say. Everybody was trying <em>not to laugh. </em></p><p><em>Idiots. </em>Rufus thought, even though he couldn’t admit that he too had a wide smile on his lips. Hannah seemed more fixated on the fact that her brother wasn’t alone. Another girl was sitting beside him and it looked like that the two of them were having one <em>serious </em>argument. The woman escorting him was <em>gorgeous </em>nonetheless. The pitch-black dress complimented the combination of the blue-green and purple colour of her hair. Hannah then reminded herself, that Reno had yet to ask for her help to <em>deal with his ‘crazy’ </em>girlfriend, <em>just like he had said.</em></p><p>She couldn’t tell what they were arguing about, but she knew that a moment later, her brother received a slap on his cheek that made Hannah wince. Even Rude -the ever-stoic Turk who sat nearby- he turned at the loud smacking sound of that slap. It did leave a red, hand-shaped mark on his cheek and Hannah was trying her best not to burst out laughing like a <em>dying chocobo. </em>Caroline had had a <em>heavy </em>hand <em>indeed. </em>And then, she was on her feet, leaving the building with Reno following hastily from behind.</p><p>Hannah <em>did </em>consider helping her brother, but <em>on second thought, </em>this was way too hilarious to stop it. He hadn’t asked for her help <em>yet, </em>and, <em>besides</em>, he was an <em>adult. </em>It was time he dealt with such problems <em>himself</em>.  </p><p>“Looks like he’s in trouble,” Rufus’s voice came from beside her and she turned her attention back to him.</p><p>Hannah’s face was red from trying to suppress the laughter. She sucked in a deep breath trying to snap out of it, and her hand reached for her eyes, wiping a couple of tears that had gathered there. “Oh dear- do you know her?”</p><p>“She’s worked for me,” Rufus shrugged.</p><p>Hannah arched an eyebrow. “Everybody’s worked for you,”</p><p>He couldn’t tell she wasn’t right. A smirk flashed across his lips.</p><p>◄ ◊ ► ◄ ◊ ► ◉ ◄ ◊ ► ◄ ◊ ►</p><p>The food was delicious, the people were many and the chatter was loud. They were dining in a huge hall no further away from Mideel, surrounded by greenery. Rufus noted to himself that <em>should he marry Hannah, </em>they too should do that somewhere <em>far away </em>from large cities. He had grown so <em>sick </em>of large cities.</p><p>The two of them were seated in a large circular table, with the Turks. It was Elena that kept asking stupid questions to both Hannah and Reno’s girlfriend. Reno kept cringing whenever his girlfriend kept answering those questions in detail, and Tseng kept scolding Elena for even asking in the first place. Rude and Rufus were silent as always, and Hannah was trying her best not to laugh.</p><p>“So how do you take your coffee?” Elena asked looking at Caroline’s direction.</p><p>Tseng’s hand reached for his forehead rubbing an insistent ache away. “Elena-”</p><p>Caroline chuckled “No worries, that’s an easy one. I take my coffee just like I take my men…” and then she turned at Reno. “…red-haired and stupid!”</p><p>“Oh, don’t give me that bullshit again-” Reno whined in protest.</p><p>“Oh? So, what if I do? What are you gonna do about it?” Caroline shot back. She did have a mischievous smile beneath that forced angry grin.</p><p>At that, Reno’s hand snuck over her thigh and he leaned close. His breath found her earlobe and Caroline found it hard to keep pretending to be angry at him. “Trust me, babe, I want nothing but to hear you beg,” He said against her ear and Caroline shivered. <em>Damn him. </em></p><p>Elena’s hand landed on Tseng’s shoulder who had been -possibly- brooding over something, but she did manage to snap him back to reality. “You never do anything like that to me!” she protested.</p><p>Tseng raised an eyebrow as he turned to his girlfriend. “You want me to blackmail you?” <em>This is absurd. </em></p><p>Elena groaned “No! Well… yes…?”</p><p>Rude’s phone began ringing. He cleared his throat, a couple of times “E- Excuse m- me…” he stood up only to walk away flipping the phone open and pressing it to his ear.</p><p>Hannah watched Rude as he picked up the phone. Then she turned and saw Elena trying to explain things to Tseng, and Reno with Caroline were already making out. “Oh boy,” Then she felt Rufus’s lips touching her ear and his hand found her own.</p><p>“How about we escape this freakshow?” Rufus suggested and Hannah gratefully turned and gave him a look.</p><p>“Yes, please,”</p><p>The two excused themselves before standing up. Rufus’s hand caught her own and she followed him as they escaped the large group of tables where all the guests dined. It was night outside. There were no clouds and the stars shined bright above. But there was no moon, and -most importantly- there wasn’t that <em>loud, </em>annoying chatter of people. It was just the two of them in the middle of the large garden that surrounded the building.</p><p>It was cold outside, but their coats were doing a pretty good job at sheltering their bodies from the smooth, cold breeze. It was quiet, devoid of people but the two of them. The lights were all that came from the windows of the building, and -honestly- Hannah wouldn’t have it any other way. She loved the silence.</p><p>“That was a good idea,” She admitted as the two of them sat on a wooden bench that stood in the middle of the trees and bushes.</p><p>Rufus sat beside her and he watched her as she nuzzled further beneath her coat with her arms wrapped around her body tightly. He passed a hand around her and brought her close. Hannah’s head rested on his shoulder and she felt the weight of his own cheek pressing against her forehead. He planted a kiss there and the two of them just stared at the clear night sky for a short moment.</p><p>And then came a question that he wasn’t expecting her to ever ask. “Why did you do it?” Rufus pulled back slightly, to meet her eyes with his own, and search for what exactly she was talking about. Hannah bit the inside of her cheek thinking that maybe -just <em>maybe</em>- bringing this up <em>now </em>was probably a bad idea, but she needed to know, and she found that through all that time that they had spent together, she had never really asked. “Why did you give me that gun that day?”</p><p>Rufus bit his tongue slightly. He knew that question would come, and he knew he could say nothing but the truth. Everything that happened that day, it all happened so fast that he -<em>honestly</em>- didn’t have the time nor the energy -due to his injuries- to think things through.</p><p>“It will sound foolish, and it probably is, but I did it to protect you…”</p><p>He looked down at her, and he could say that she wasn’t quite pleased with what he had just said. If he wanted to protect her, he would have never <em>asked </em>her to get off that helicopter so that he and the rest of the people could be saved. But he did have more to say.</p><p>“…if Meteor struck the Planet, then we would all die a painful, burning death whether we escaped with the chopper, or whether we didn’t. I didn’t want that for you. I wanted you to have a fast and painless death, Hannah. I didn’t want you to suffer. Could I walk, I would’ve jumped off myself. Maybe I should have just <em>crawled</em> out, or shoot myself on the spot-”</p><p>“Rufus-”</p><p>“I blame myself to this day. Or at least, I did blame myself for every single day because I had sent you to your demise and I had to hurt you and watch you die-”</p><p>“It’s alright,” Hannah said and she gave him a smile.</p><p>How could she still say that? How could she still give him a smile and cup his cheek like none of that had happened? She loved him, and he knew it, but he also knew that he didn’t deserve any of that.</p><p>
  <em>No. </em>
</p><p>He had to make things right. He had to prove himself worthy of her love and her affection. Worthy of having her as his own. His hand found her own that was cupping his cheek. It was time he set things right and sealed their bond forevermore.</p><p>“I didn’t mean to hurt you, Hannah. But I didn’t want to fall for you either. If I was to feel something for somebody and I lost them, I didn’t want to feel that same pain I got through when my mother died…” Both pairs of their hands tangled with each other and he could tell that <em>now </em>she was looking sympathetically up at him. “…I want you with me. I want to know you’re safe, because I love you, Hannah,”</p><p>And then her heart skipped a beat when he knelt before her. <em>No way… what is he doing?! </em>His hand reached for his pocket and he pulled out a lilac, velvet box. Her heart was already melting from what he had been telling her and she could tell she was about to start crying.</p><p>He revealed the ring, but she didn’t pay as much attention to it as she paid to the <em>fact that he was actually proposing to her. </em>She must have been living some kind of a dream. Some kind of an illusion.</p><p>“And that’s why I ask you, Hannah Sinclair, would you do me the impeccable honour, of-”</p><p>“Yes!” He barely even got the time to pass the ring to her finger before she jumped on her feet and her hands found his face.</p><p>She cupped both his cheek and her lips found his own. Rufus chuckled in the kiss before his arms found their way around her waist and pulled her close. His lips closed gracefully around hers and their tongues met -once again- in a blissful dance.</p><p>His arms tightened around her, clutching in her clothes whilst her fingers found his hair. Everything was going to be alright <em>now. </em>She was <em>his. </em>She was <em>with him, </em>and it would stay that way.</p><p>
  <em>Always.  </em>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>No, I didn't write an 80k word fanfic in two days, tho I wish I had the capability to do that 🤣🤣 Been working on that bad boy three months now! Thank you all for reading!! It's one of the few books that I write and it ends with a Happy End eheheheh but both Rufus and Hannah deserve a Happy End so I had to. </p><p>I hope you enjoyed it! The next fanfic that will be part of <strong> Sandy's Canon World of FFVII </strong> Series will be the Reno x Caroline ship since they show up briefly here. <em> I really hope I get to write it and not neglect like a 100 other fanfics that I have yet to finish </em> 😭😭😭😭</p><p>Please drop' em Kudos if you liked it and lemme know through your comments if you enjoyed it! 😘❤</p>
        </blockquote><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thank you for reading! Please make sure to drop 'em Kudos if you liked it!!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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